BannedGod
Senior Don Juan
Or am I screwed for life and she will always think of me as a friend? If so, how? HOW DAMNIT!?
<_<
This is a serious thread by the way
<_<
This is a serious thread by the way
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Say I acted liked an AFC with a girl, is there a way to redeem myself?
- Thread starter BannedGod
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Pappadapolis
Don Juan
It will never change. Ever. You really need to read the articles and apply the advice as the situation warrants. Your posts have been about trying to un-AFC yourself. The best way to do this is to avoid AFC behaviors to begin with. I can smell your oneitis for this girl. Like I said in the other thread, she is dead to you.
BannedGod
Senior Don Juan
Aye aye capt'n! And yea I think, despite me, I developped oneitis for her, even though I really did not want too... I still have mucho learning to doPappadapolis said:It will never change. Ever. You really need to read the articles and apply the advice as the situation warrants. Your posts have been about trying to un-AFC yourself. The best way to do this is to avoid AFC behaviors to begin with. I can smell your oneitis for this girl. Like I said in the other thread, she is dead to you.
Anyways you think I should just completly forget about her and stop initiating conversation with her and stuff? If she does, however, how should I react? Be too busy for her always, or eventually give her a shot again?
Pappadapolis
Don Juan
BannedGod said:Aye aye capt'n! And yea I think, despite me, I developped oneitis for her, even though I really did not want too... I still have mucho learning to do
Anyways you think I should just completly forget about her and stop initiating conversation with her and stuff? If she does, however, how should I react? Be too busy for her always, or eventually give her a shot again?
She doesn't deserve another shot because she hasn't earned it. The best way to forget about one girl is to get another.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-xp0LewhI8
BannedGod
Senior Don Juan
Yea I guess you are right... But it's hard sometimes to act like that, especially since I'm good friends with a lot of her friends, it might complicate things.Pappadapolis said:She doesn't deserve another shot because she hasn't earned it. The best way to forget about one girl is to get another.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-xp0LewhI8
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
comic_relief
Master Don Juan
don't go for girls anymore until you learn how to become happy with yourself. Then, girls will fall at your feet. Women NEED a reason to go after YOU. Don't try to validate yourself for them, make them validate themselves for YOU.
comic_relief
comic_relief
BannedGod
Senior Don Juan
And how do you suggest I do that? I keep hearing this argument again and again, but it's never really backed upcomic_relief said:don't go for girls anymore until you learn how to become happy with yourself. Then, girls will fall at your feet. Women NEED a reason to go after YOU. Don't try to validate yourself for them, make them validate themselves for YOU.
comic_relief
Pappadapolis
Don Juan
Don't listen to her problems, don't be available to her when she calls. Don't be afraid to hurt her feelings or piss her off.You have to build a life that defines you, the most common way is hanging with your homeboys. Since she sees you as just an AFC, her friends will too. Girls talk.BannedGod said:And how do you suggest I do that? I keep hearing this argument again and again, but it's never really backed up
NickSCFC2000
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2007
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Depends, if it's someone you're still going out with, and perhaps you've been too affectionate or AFC (too many calls, kisses, meetings), why not use this to your advantage?
ALL girls/women WANT an AFC, it's true! The problem is, when they GET one, they go off them and throw them away, it's like they get what they want, and don't need it anymore. So withdraw all the nice stuff, and sooner or later she'll crave for it again. This is where you start the "Treat 'em mean" stuff and have her crawling for you...
well, maybe I'm being TOO optimistic here, but it's often what happens.
PS, good idea on stopping the contact, if you do things right they usually call you after a week or 2 wanting to meet up...
just say "Soz busy this week, how's it goin?" keep it polite but short. Then when you feel you won't go all AFC next time you meet, arrange to meet up and take the game from there.
ALL girls/women WANT an AFC, it's true! The problem is, when they GET one, they go off them and throw them away, it's like they get what they want, and don't need it anymore. So withdraw all the nice stuff, and sooner or later she'll crave for it again. This is where you start the "Treat 'em mean" stuff and have her crawling for you...
well, maybe I'm being TOO optimistic here, but it's often what happens.
PS, good idea on stopping the contact, if you do things right they usually call you after a week or 2 wanting to meet up...
just say "Soz busy this week, how's it goin?" keep it polite but short. Then when you feel you won't go all AFC next time you meet, arrange to meet up and take the game from there.