Hey everyone, male (22) 6'3, recently dropped 138lbs in 9 months. Been going to a club I use to frequent but stopped attending as the women there just weren't attracted (can't blame 'em). Went back in this Friday with a buddy of mine, same environment, same routine women. But it was different, I literally walked in and got chat up within my first 5 steps inside. I was getting ogled, and "eye-****ed". I guess I enjoyed being spotlight, but I keep getting this gut-wrenching feeling of resentment towards the women and especially of my self. Telling myself (from my preconditioned "fat" phase) "I don't deserve this, "why won't they look at other men", "stop staring at me". Can anyone articulate how they were able to transition from being Idk fat or unattractive, to moderatley better and how to better handle the 'NEW found attention'?
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Same Club, Different weight.
- Thread starter boggob15
- Start date
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Serenity
Moderator
You sure it's that and not a hidden resentment over the implication of this is that all they cared about was your look and nothing else, as that's the only difference?
I never really struggled with physical attractiveness, other than bad hair and clothes style so I couldn't tell you. I guess you just have to stop questioning it, stop resisting it and just roll with it. Don't try figuring out why and just enjoy that this works, you probably won't reach any helpful conclusions anyways.