You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
No offense taken. I agree that one shouldn't obsess over bodyweight, but it's relevent in my case because I want to fight as a middleweight (160 lbs.) not as a small heavyweight. So the scale matters.Pimp-sicle said:One: Weighing yourself every couple days is absolutely pointless.
a) weight naturally fluctuates throughout the day, due to fluid intake, about of food ingested, etc. If you do weigh yourself, it should be first thing in the morning right when you get up. I would do it once every 2-3 weeks MAX.
b) piggybacking on point a. Your weight is irrelevant, ESPECIALLY when your trying to drop body fat and put on muscle. Your body COMPOSITION is much more important. Measure inches; waist, chest, neck, thighs, arms, calves etc to see if your making progress. Lastly, definitely get your body fat taken every 10-14 days like clock-work.
I've never understood why the average joe is obsessed with seeing a number on a scale when their body composition is much more important. If you hit 160-165 and have no muscle on you, you'll look like a concentration camp victim at your height. Okay not completely, but close.
c) Your diet sucks.... sorry its the truth and I'm being honest to help you. Severely lacking in quality protein, lacking in good fats and to top it off you have no idea how many total calories your intaking.
Add to the fact that you seem to have weak will power, then punish your body by not eating for the rest of the day once you have a cookie or something you perceive as bad.
When your cutting if your diet is 95% in check and your consistent, a cookie here and there will not kill your diet. And the whole starving yourself routine is very catabolic to muscle mass and slowsssss down your metabolism.
d) As Fugly pointed out, you should get your diet in check. Look into carb cycling, re-feed days and get to it.
Sorry if this post came off as arse-wholish, I'm all about putting 100% effort toward your goal and you seem like your a good guy with the right intentions, but your half-arsssing it expecting different results. Not gonna happen.
You have made a journal, you want to do this in your mind, but you are weak willed right now.
Part of weak will comes from not planning out your diet. When you don't plan your diet, its a lot easier to make a bad choice.
PIMP
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.