Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
You don't blame her, but I do. Exams are starting next week? so she can stay over an extra hour and screw around, no? Unless she's the valedictorian at MIT, her finals are not a 24-hour concern a week beforehand.phoenixriver said:J has already gotten back in touch with me, saying this Saturday won't be anything more than just salsa and dinner. We both have Finals exams starting next week, so I don't blame her.
This is the kind of forum jargon that sounds good and all, but is absolutely useless.Charm said:What do you mean "if it doesnt work out well?". Being a DJ is about making your own destiny. Get that thru your head. Your fantasy becomes reality when you let the two collide.
phoenixriver said:For the time being, I'm going to continue with the road trip plan, because that's a little too far developed to break off. (And frankly it sounds like it'll be good fun, girls or no girls - I mean come on - six days in Orlando in the midwinter? Can't miss!)
J has already gotten back in touch with me, saying this Saturday won't be anything more than just salsa and dinner. We both have Finals exams starting next week, so I don't blame her.
I think I may have a different time frame from the rest of you guys. I'm a first year law school student, and if you know anything about law school, first year's generally the worst time possible to even think about a new relationship. I wouldn't even normally consider it, except this lady was dropped in my lap by friends. If it doesn't work out with her, well - too bad, but I was prepared to go the whole first year without any girl anyway.
Anyhow, exams are looming and so I won't take up more of your time. Thanks for the input - you've all been great!
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.