"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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Reframing faliure, getting through tough times

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Master Don Juan
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I'd been doing great for a long time with this stuff. I was well on my way, and had made huge strides. My posture was more open, I was more relaxed and natural, and everything in my life way improving due to my positive outlook.
But then some stuff happened, and to make it short, I've been reverting to how I was. I lack focus, I'm all over the map, anxious, stressed, and just not doing well. Most of my social interactions are very forced and stressed. It's not good.
Just recently, I talked to this girl I haven't seen in a while. She's showing every sign (except being real close with this one guy, which throws me off a bit) and I thought about her a bit, so I decided "whatever, I've spent time thinking about her, so now I should just get her number and be done with it". I couldn't do it though, and I still can't. It's really ruining my mood. Failing to do something brings me down a lot.
So what are some ways that I can refocus on being positive and not letting this get to me? Should I just carry on, don't think about this girl at all, and just focus on myself for now, or should I force myself to get her number seeing as she does like me and this would be a missed opportunity?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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unorthodox

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Check out "strong your confidence" thread, I posted a reply there. Might be something you need.
 

everywomanshero

Master Don Juan
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If you beat yourself up for not asking for the number, then you are programming your mind to simply avoid situations where you will feel guilty for not asking for the number, IMO!

Better way to look at this: Dude, that rocks that I had the ballz to talk to a chick I like. Next time it's going to be even mo pimp, cause I am gonna get the # too!'

No one interaction is the end of your social life, and everyday is a brand new life. Make tommorrow a better life.

One more suggestion, instead of trying to get the #, why not set the goals a little higher and try to get a kiss close or hold hands?

Tommorrows a new day man, make us proud tomorrow! Talk to at least 2 girls, if you get a good vibe going with one, try to hold her hand (if you want to cheat use palm reading or the greek god finger thingie).
 

Evo-Psych

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You start off saying that you have made huge strides, so try to think back and put yourself in the state of mind you were in before things went bad. Don't dwell on the recent past failures. Try to keep the progress you have made in your mind and use it as a pep talk to help psych yourself up.

Start building a new string of successes and just shrug off the mistakes and regrets. Start off with the small things you thought were going to be hard when you first became an rAFC, but became so easy later on you wondered why you ever thought it was a big deal. That will help you get your confidence back and go on from there.

Changing your life and the years of AFC conditioning is a slow process and I know I have had many slips along the way. Just make a commitment to yourself that no matter how bad things seem you never want to live your life like a chump and press on.

Good luck.
 
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