"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Rate my looks?

Wildebeest

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i know its irrelevant, but what do you guys think

avg, ugly, or good looking?

 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Wildebeest

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5'11
82 kg
fairly fit, I have decent shoulders, and nice biceps, but body fat is like in 12-20% range. No 6 pack, but stomach isnt too flabby
 

Wildebeest

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I can grow stubble slowly, with decent coverage, but I cant really grow a beard atm
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Wildebeest

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yea, I typically dont clean shave anymore, and I feel good about it.

I am asking opinions because girls never seem to think im cute in my mind at least.
 

Wildebeest

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I dont tend to get complimented on my looks. Pretty much only complimented was on pof by a psycho stalker girl in the making, who was like a 6 or 7

Ive been complimented by girls on my clothes sometimes. I dress a little bit more stylish lately. Not afraid to wear a shirt that is different or unique.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Mike32ct

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Girls are very tough on looks, much worse than us guys are. They generally only compliment the top 20 percent of guys.

This naturally leaves many decent looking and even handsome dudes (understandably) questioning their looks. I do the same thing.
 

Wildebeest

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I actually thought I was very ugly when I was 17-19.

"Girls are very tough on looks, much worse than us guys are"
- thats interesting, is it because theyre obsessed with looking good themselves?
 

Mike32ct

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I don't want to hijack your thread with a looks rant lol. Those threads get out of control lol.

But suffice to say that girls are big into looks for the following reasons:

1. Because they can. They generally get way more attention than most males do, so they can be much more picky.

2. Girls are big on status. She wants to show off to her girlfriends that she is dating and/or hooked up with the hot guy.

3. Because of #1, they have a sense of entitlement.

So anyway, all a guy can really do is try to optimize their looks. In your case, grow some stubble and continue working out.
 

SamTheHobit

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loveshogun

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OP:

Your looks are good enough. Don't obsess over it.

If you work out, it should be for the benefits of being healthy, and the huge impact being healthy makes on your everyday life - looks are just a nice positive side-effect.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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marmel75

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loveshogun said:
OP:

Your looks are good enough. Don't obsess over it.

If you work out, it should be for the benefits of being healthy, and the huge impact being healthy makes on your everyday life - looks are just a nice positive side-effect.
Always remember that to bang a girl, you only really need to meet a certain "minimum requirements" in the looks department. As long as you do that, what happens is really up to your abilities. Obviously if you are a great looking guy, its going to be easier for you because your looks alone will turn her on, but there are a lot of other way to turn women on besides looks. I think you are a decent enough looking guy...actually remind me a little bit of Nicholas Cage, although a younger version...
 

vatoloco

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Wildebeest said:
yea, its actually my main dp for pof lol
doing my puppy dog eyes
Holy shit son! If this is you main pic, you're never gonna get anywhere, especially on POF!!

You exude "Nice Guy." No offense, bro. You just do. You're not a bad-looking kid but you need an edge...
 

floydb25

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You look kind of like Nicholas Cage. There's a resemblance, at least. It doesn't really matter what guys think about how you look - only women. Not women on PoF, either. If you have girls checking you out and agreeing to dates, you're good. They don't have to compliment you; not all women are forward. The city / state I live in now has a lot of reserved, shy, polite, traditional women (the south) who don't seem very flirtacious or social, but I can see them staring from a distance, so its all good. Back home (the midwest), the girls were very forward and aggressive, and had no problems approaching, flirting, complimenting, or getting right down to business. All depends on the locale, and the people you run into. Not everyone is going to say "hey sexy" or "you're hot", or scream / whistle at you. They might not say anything, or come up to you at all. Looks are looks. If you get them, and get dates, and sexual advances, you're good. Don't obsess because you're not being approached. Only the aggressive ones tend to do that.
 

SoSuaveDude

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I will agree that you have the sort of nice guy look, so try some facial hair.

Other than that, get your confidence up because making this thread is a clear cutaway that you are lacking a bit in the area (which is also most important).
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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