"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

question...

window

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 25, 2007
Messages
472
Reaction score
7
If a new girl suggests to you to go and see a movie with her but she sais she is bringing a friend along for "support" how do you deal with it ?
 
Last edited:

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

horaholic

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 12, 2008
Messages
2,254
Reaction score
79
Find a distraction for the friend. Blind date style. Actually, I would change plans altogether. I think you should go get a couple drinks together instead, till everyones comfortable, and save the movie, for when its just the two of you. Movies are bad first dates anyway.

Can you give us some more info? How do you know this chick, and who is her support friend?
 

Jitterbug

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 12, 2008
Messages
3,197
Reaction score
140
I'd only tolerate this "bring a friend for support" BS if I were still in high school. Adults should be able to deal with other people socially on their own.

I'd counter offer with something else.
 

squirrels

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 15, 2003
Messages
6,620
Reaction score
186
Age
47
Location
A universe...where heartbreak and sadness have bee
1) horaholic is right...why are you asking a girl to a movie the first night out? Juvenile behavior begets juvenile behavior. How did you arrange this date? Are you meeting her at her house? Your house? If she's uncomfortable, something like coffee at Starbucks might be a better play...meeting at a public place in broad daylight.

A movie is a crummy first date...you already have a girl that you don't know well enough that she's comfortable meeting you alone, and now you want to hang with her in a dark place where she can't talk to you and get to know you. Balls. I go to movies by myself. You have company...make use of it.

2) Why is she bringing a friend? Is this an Internet deal? If she's bringing a friend, she's trying to c*ck-block you. She's either not that into you, or she's wound way too tight for living.

"Support"...LOL!

I'd cancel. Tell her I'm not gonna make it. I had a girl pull that "bringing a friend" crap last-minute on me. Her friend ended up drawing over a random pack of dudes so my date ended up looking out for HER, so I couldn't isolate. They talked for like an hour and a half about beer and getting drunk or some ****. I bailed.

Tell her that you're not into chaperone-dates. You're looking for someone more mature than that.
 

jophil28

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 18, 2006
Messages
5,216
Reaction score
278
Location
Gold Coast. Aust.
window said:
If a new girl suggests to you to go and see a movie with her but she sais she is bringing a friend along for "support" how do you deal with it ?
I would say, " She can come along only if I sit in between you two.You both get to hold only one of my hands each. Who gets what hand is a matter of negotiation beween you.
Oh, and no crying, talking or sniffling at the weepy parts, and keep your hand off my leg or i will call your parents.."
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

STR8UP

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 10, 2002
Messages
6,911
Reaction score
125
I accepted these terms ONE TIME.

Actually, she brought her best friend AND her little brother (didn't know about the brother) and expected me to pay.

I dumped her a few days before Valentines Day.

Eat that beeyotch!
 

Mr. Me

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2007
Messages
1,356
Reaction score
84
You don't agree to the date. Nicely turn her down and suggest another time when it can be just the two of you. Period. End of story. Sort of like, "Hey, thanks, but I'd rather do something just me and you. How's next Sunday? Let's go see it then."

The reason you don't want someone else there (not even if you find someone for that person or double date) is that it's a distraction between you and the girl and interrupt whatever vibe you're creating, maybe even cut your date short because they don't "feel well" or whatever.

Also, the other person can act like a c@ckblocker if they don't want to "give up" their friend to you.

Also, now you have to "entertain" their friend(s), IOW, they have to like you and as they're not there because they're interested in you in the first place, that can work against you. And if they don't like you, they'll influence her against you too, especially if this is one of your first dates in with her. So, why take the chance?

You have to date smart and reduce the odds of things happening that could work against you by running a tight ship.

squirrels said:
A movie is a crummy first date.
True. It's passive and you're just sitting mutually staring at a screen, rather then having fun interacting together. That's why scary movies are better. But the reason he should go to the movies in this case is because SHE invited him. That signals some interest and it should be rewarded. It's just that she wants to bring along someone and that's not acceptable.
 

Rollo Tomassi

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 4, 2004
Messages
5,307
Reaction score
343
Age
58
Location
Nevada
NEXT.

If an adult female you'd like to be dating suggests a chaperone (i.e. cøckblocker) come along on the date, you're not dealing with an adult, you're dealing with an adolescent. At 37 y.o. I'd say it's long past due that you stop dating like a middle schooler.

Teenagers go on dates like this, adults do not.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Top