"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Question for guys over 40

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Powersurgeon

Don Juan
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I already told her that if he's going to share time with the kids I have to meet him. Or better told, he's going to meet me. I'm a recovering AFC and so my thread reeks of betaness, but as a recovering chump now I know that I wouldn't invest in a LTR with a woman like my ex.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Albatross953

Master Don Juan
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He's probably an alright guy. And just as much of a chump as you were. As we all were.
 
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Eco-J

Don Juan
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Yeah, there's nothing really that unusual about it. He's likely an AFC who either doesn't know or makes excuses for your ex's cheating and is "interested" in the kids bc he's sucking up to your ex (and not a dangerous pedophile). Don't let it drive you crazy.

I went through the exact same thing when I split w/ my ex - who I was still seeing daily bc of the kids - including wondering why her new admirer was so interested in the kids and telling her I thought he might be a pedophile. Shockingly, leading with accusing her of taking up with a pedophile made her less interested in listening when I came back with calmer requests (limit his interactions w/ the kids bc it can be confusing to them; see him when the kids are w/ me, etc.).
 
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Powersurgeon

Don Juan
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Thank you

Eco-J said:
Yeah, there's nothing really that unusual about it. He's likely an AFC who either doesn't know or makes excuses for your ex's cheating and is "interested" in the kids bc he's sucking up to your ex (and not a dangerous pedophile). Don't let it drive you crazy.

I went through the exact same thing when I split w/ my ex - who I was still seeing daily bc of the kids - including wondering why her new admirer was so interested in the kids and telling her I thought he might be a pedophile. Shockingly, leading with accusing her of taking up with a pedophile made her less interested in listening when I came back with calmer requests (limit his interactions w/ the kids bc it can be confusing to them; see him when the kids are w/ me, etc.).
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That's a very good advice. Yeah, I see this guy as a total AFC, and my ex being post wall or very close to it knows that she has to stick with this "nice guy", that buys her things and invites her to trips, etc.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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