"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Pursuing another mans woman...?

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What a conundrum! She wants you but she wants her b/f! - and does not want to leave any of you - I say pull a train on this ho!!!!

It is not up to you so quit worrying about it. You are not going to leave her on principle, are you? So that leaves the decision solely in her hands, doesn't it?

Just don't pursue her as if she is worthy! You are falling in love with her already, aren't you? Stop it!!
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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CrazyGoNuts

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nah its not love, im very jaded when it comes to love. It takes alot for me to even consider being in love with someone, it makes me sick how people use that word with each other as if its just another word. The reason its such a problem for me is that ive been hookin up with random chicks lately even if their personality is horrible. Its just that there are a variety of things i look for in a girl and she has a large majority of them, I dont want something potentially good to waste away without at least putting some effort into trying to get her. I've put effort into useless b!tches for so long, I at least owe it to myself to put an effort into someone who is worth my time for a change.
 

elvis aint dead yet

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The biggest concern I see with you is, you might not be in love with this girl, but you are consistently finding ways to hang out with her, talk to her on the phone, spend time with her and on and on.

You even stated that she's the kind of girl you are looking for.

You might not be in love, but you have gone beyond just wanting a ONE NIGHT STAND or a FRIEND WITH BENEFITS.

My question for you is,

Why are you persuing a girl who said

"SHE NEVER CHEATED ON HER BOYFRIEND," and then basically proceeded to hook up with you?

You already hooked up, why are you persuing this relationship even further?
 
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She can't be that good, if she is seeing you and has a boyfriend! Huh?? Doesn't sound like a good woman to me. I know, I know, 'she's cute!!
 

CrazyGoNuts

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I'm actually not the one finding ways to hang out, I was actually told last night that she is callin my friends gf all the time asking to hang out with all of us even tho its me she cares about. I have yet to call her which is what seems to be the problem for me. If I dont talk to her all that often I have no way of knowing whats goin on in the meantime.

Why are you persuing a girl who said

"SHE NEVER CHEATED ON HER BOYFRIEND," and then basically proceeded to hook up with you?
Well I like the fact that she never cheated, but at the same time she openly admitted she wanted to be with me and that it was a problem. It was only after I told her I felt the same that stuff happened so I mean its not like she is doing this to be mean to her bf (altho that is an unfortunate effect anyways) we just cant help the way we feel. Up until last night she wasnt aware that I wasnt doing this for fun, I told her that I hooked up with her because I wanted to and because its something I had wanted to do from day one and the same goes for her.

She confused and I am just gonna give her time to figure out what she wants. I do this because sometimes when you meet random girls you happen to just come across one who stands above all the rest and she just happens to be one. I am pursuing her because we just really click well together and I owe it to myself to at least try to be with her. I can tell its what we both want but I understand she cant just dump a boyfriend shes been with for over a year without knowing with 100% certainty that things with me would work out.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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