oakraiderz2
Master Don Juan
I know there are some here, theres gotta be. I just wanna know what year you are, if you wanna go to grad school, what youre interested in and anything else interesting.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Please tell us what your real major is.Potbelly said:You mean who here is getting a degree in having common sense? Like if someone is sad...what does it mean? Hmm...they're depressed maybe...
Not me, I chose a real major.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I was joking man...did you not read the sarcasm? My real major is in economics and biology (double major). I might have to minor in one of those though....dunno how it looks right now.seanchai said:Please tell us what your real major is.
I didnt see any sarcasm in it either...interesting combo you got there.Potbelly said:I was joking man...did you not read the sarcasm? My real major is in economics and biology (double major). I might have to minor in one of those though....dunno how it looks right now.
My favorite professor, who teaches most of the classes I take, loves Seligman. He's also very big on Erik Erikson, whose Developmental Stages are forever etched into my brain as a result. Last MOD we essentially focused entirely on Positive Psychology and counseling using the Skilled Helper Model...from Egan's "Essentials of Skilled Helping". That text is geared heavily towards Positive Psychology. Good stuff...doctoroxygen said:I'm graduating with a degree in psychology this summer. I just presented my research on interactions between sexual history and situational factors on automatic sexual perceptions at a research symposium at my school yesterday.
Next year I'm going to be a paid research assistant in the psych department at my university while applying to Ph.D. programs in clinical psych with an emphasis on positive psychology interventions.
That is, of course, if I don't decide on medicine instead![]()
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
lol...it's easier to tolerate people when you want to learn from them.doctoroxygen said:Seligman is a genius academically, but I hear he's a monster ****. Of course, I wouldn't turn down a spot at Penn's program
The program that interests me in George Mason with Todd Kashdan. He researches both curiosity as a signature strength and social anxiety in veterans.
Are you familiar with positive psychotherapy? If you have access to PSYCInfo look it up. It's in the Nov 2006 "American Psychologist". Fascinating and ground-breaking article, but largely ignored by disease-oriented folks.
That's very true, and a lot of psychology professors think it's a problem. There's a huge amount of "physics envy" in psychology, a real need to focus on making psychology into a "hard science" when that's not what it was intended to be. I say leave the real science to the biologists, chemists, and physicists and let psychology be fascinated by the world without understanding itPlasticSurgeon said:A lot of Psych programs are integrated heavily with Biology and Physiology and in my opinion that is the direction the field of Psych is moving.
Statistics are only as good as the people gathering them are honest and objective. Statistics are so easily manipulated to show whatever the person wants them to show.PlasticSurgeon said:Psychology becomes a science with Statistics. Ever notice that every psych program requires a stats class? You can prove any theory with t tests, chi square's, confidence intervals, and the 'null hypothesis.' Stats is the course that proves psychology is a real science!![]()
Agreed, a good statistician can prove just about anything.Wyldfire said:Statistics are only as good as the people gathering them are honest and objective. Statistics are so easily manipulated to show whatever the person wants them to show...
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Only to people who are foolish enough to trust statistics.Francisco d'Anconia said:Agreed, a good statistician can prove just about anything.
The fact is...you are foolish if you trust statistics. I've worked for lots of non-profits who only got necessary funding by statistically proving there was a large need for their services. People who gather statistics have already decided prior to gathering them WHAT they want the statistics to show. So...they target populations most likely to provide the statistics they are looking for.Potbelly said:^ words of an idiot.
You trust good statistics you dumbass. Just because it isn't perfect and people cheat doesn't mean you discount the whole field. Do you go discounting all churches because some pervs molest kids?
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.