"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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ppl always say that im over confident?

antidonjuan

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back to grade 6 teachers and friends all say that i am over confident even until now, the girls ive talked to always said that i am over confident and somtimes ****y, what should i do? after reading the dj bible, i learned that confident and ****iness are great things, but ppl are actually stating this fact, it feels awkward hearing it

should i back off a bit and act a bit less confident?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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L Duke

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antidonjuan said:
back to grade 6 teachers and friends all say that i am over confident even until now, the girls ive talked to always said that i am over confident and somtimes ****y, what should i do? after reading the dj bible, i learned that confident and ****iness are great things, but ppl are actually stating this fact, it feels awkward hearing it

should i back off a bit and act a bit less confident?
take as a compliment because it is
 

antidonjuan

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yea, i think i am haha but its just the way i am.. i tried to back off sometimes but i show overconfidence and some arrogance without concience, ehh this is annoying
 

War Against Betaism

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It all depends on the tone they said it to you in. If they said it in a way like "Hey you're pretty overconfident," it MIGHT mean a good thing. Being overconfidence is better than having a lack of self esteem. But if they said it like "omg I swear you're so overconfident," then that's bad. Just be more open minded.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Damian

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There's a line between CONFIDENCE and ARROGANCE. I've learned the hard way that RESPECT is that line.

A lot of people, when starting out with C+F, overcompensate for confidence with arrogance. They disregard everyone else's thoughts and opinions because it is easy to assume they are insignificant compared to whatever your own thoughts are. This creates a sort of enmity that pushes you into the "a-hole" zone. It's almost too easy to become self-absorbed and jaded, but you always have to keep others' emotions in the back of your mind.

Over time, you'll come to find a balance between confidence and disregard. You can still be confident while practicing mutual respect. Have serious conversations with people and take respect their opinions. You can be confident and sympathetic at the same time. Be aware of how other people feel around you and have them keep a positive attitude of you. Remember that a good DJ is confident, but behind that confidence is an empathetic individual that can understand and connect with people on an emotional level.
 

Dank Juan

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If you were playful and funny you wouldn't come off as such an ass.
 
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