Power struggle with gf

[derby1]

Idk if she’s cheating she has like 0 friends lol

the blue pill conditioning is deep, real deep.

we need to talk bro

she has an eco system of friends..............

not suggesting she is cheating, but they cant live without that eco system.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

For the love of god, don’t think she’s cheating on you because of the typical pua logic knee jerk reactions on this thread. Just listen to what Dash said and if it continues on then we might have a big problem lol. However, I feel like there’s other things you are leaving out. MDMA, cutting, dude you should stick to 13-15% bf especially in a relationship. Anything below that will be an eating disorder especially if you’re in a relationship.

 

[manfrombelow]

Ah the classic timeless universal story about how your female wants to be the alpha in your sweet loving relationships.

 

[spred]

Like Corey Wayne is saying, match and mirror her actions: pull back and see how she is responding. If she keeps becoming colder and doesn’t want sex, she is lining up your replacement.
If she has issues with work or other stuff, she will notice you pull back and become closer again.

 

[Bigpapa]

I (20m) visited my gf (20F) yesterday and was planning on satying until sunday, (she lives 1h away). So I get there right, first time seeing her in awhile and thought I would give her some flowers (like the afc I am) bc I havent done that too many times. The evening approaches and I assume we’re gonna have sex like we always do, we basically do every night before bed. I make a move but she doesn’t want to. So i just forget about it and go to bed. I tried again in the morning but she didnt want to AND she didnt even wanna cuddle plus she was acting kinda cold and had not even kissed me yet.

So in the afternoon I lie to her that I have a headache and I go home because im not gonna sit and tolerate this behaviour towards me. She’s basically treating me like a friend at this point. I can tell she gets kinda mad that I wanna go home though. But I still follow through, although I am quite sure that I would have gotten laid this night but I think she’s trying to controll me with her ***** and im not gonna be a slave to that ****.

Now I just plan on laying low on the contact with her and let her realize her behaviour is not ok. She has to appreciate me and realize that im not gonna be some simp to her.

might also be a thing about your relationship not evolving , and does not see you as a long term relationship prospect as you are far away from her ( 1h drive ) . A relationship either evolves , either you guys brake up

For how long you are together ?

 

[Atom Smasher]

OP, I can tell by the way you write that you’re going get your sh!t together with women in the near future as you mature, but you’re not quite there yet.

Girls at her age have their heads completely up their asses. They are confused wrecks and are vulnerable to almost all influences.

Girls absolutely CRAVE a man they can look up to, a man they consider to have higher value than them. They CRAVE a man who corrects them and tells them “how it is”, not so much after the fact but rather by insinuating boundaries.

I always tell these guys here that my wife has never given me a sh!t test even once, but I can actually think of two times very early in our relationship. One was we were walking toward an amusement park entrance with multiple booths and she pulled my hand and said “this one is open “. I powerfully pulled her over to one over to the other side and said “we’re going through this one”. She never tried to lead me again.

The other was one day I went to hold her hand while we were walking somewhere and she seemed to resist. I immediately withdrew and silently rejected her attempt to hold hands. I kept my body language distant for a little while (ignoring her) and she was all over me wanting to hold hands and be physically close.

Words are a losing proposition with women. When the misbehave or display indecisiveness, you need to display to them that your very ESSENCE is that of a leader who considers it unthinkable to to respond to her energy.

YOU are the source of energy flow in the relationship. You are the one who sets boundaries, not so much verbally (although occasionally that’s appropriate), but more by your rock-solid frame.

A woman needs to learn early on that she is entirely expendable and that you are running the show. With this girl, you need to pull way, way back and display that you are losing interest. Either she will straighten out or bail. Either way you win. She is either entertaining the thought of another guy who’s chasing after her OR she finds you weak.

Many men give off a “please love me” puppy dog vibe, and you want to avoid that at all costs. Another way to put it is that they convey that they are “all-in” with the girl. Women should be made to feel a roller coaster of acceptance vs. indifference. This confusion keeps them on their toes and deep down inside this roller coaster of emotion is addicting.

There’s a lot of nuance to doing this successfully (you can’t over-do the hills nor the valleys of the roller coaster), but you can start by not accepting her indifference. Her indifference must be met by indifference on your part.

This will eliminate the no man’s land of ruminating about the unknown. It will force her hand and expose what’s really going on, thereby freeing you from worry.

 

[Dash Riprock]

I would go a step further than everyone else here and just do yourself a favor and break up with her now. Guarantee her tone changes massively. You then decide if you want her back in your life. My guess is you do - even though you shouldn’t. Her behavior shows it is only a matter of time before she calls it off IMO.

The preemptive breakup is probably the most effective weapon in raising interest level. Thing is, you have to stick to it or you come off as weak.

OP may be better off calling a "timeout" if she reaches out to him. This will still pique her interest and will buy him some time to see if he wants to see her again. Lots of moving parts to playing this right but it can be quite effective. But, 90% of the time things may be ok for a while but quickly revert back to the way they were with all the same BS again.

 

[Chuck Taylor]

OP, your b!tch is 20 years old. She still bases her life decisions on what/who gives her the hardest orgasms.

Either dump her now, and don't look back, or stay on the emotional rollercoaster for another few years until SHE dumps YOU. Your call. Best of luck.

 

[EyeBRollin]

You lost frame way before this happened, OP.

Go no contact until she contacts you. Then you act cold back to her. When she presses you, explain that her behavior was unacceptable and she owes you an apology. If she refuses, get off the phone with her until she hits you back up to apologize.

Step two is the broad has to make amends for her shvt behavior. That means she needs to come see you and either bring a gift or cook for you. She needs to voluntarily blow you also.

Do NOT go see this girl again until she makes amends for her behavior. This is how you discipline your woman. And if she walks, she was never yours to begin with.

 

[SoSuave666]

You lost frame way before this happened, OP.

Go no contact until she contacts you. Then you act cold back to her. When she presses you, explain that her behavior was unacceptable and she owes you an apology. If she refuses, get off the phone with her until she hits you back up to apologize.

Step two is the broad has to make amends for her shvt behavior. That means she needs to come see you and either bring a gift or cook for you. She needs to voluntarily blow you also.

Do NOT go see this girl again until she makes amends for her behavior. This is how you discipline your woman. And if she walks, she was never yours to begin with.

I agree with some of this. Don’t agree with the principle of trying to make it work after it’s clearly going downhill. I definitely agree she needs to come back, cook for you, and suck your d1ck. Mandatory.

 

[EyeBRollin]

I agree with some of this. Don’t agree with the principle of trying to make it work after it’s clearly going downhill. I definitely agree she needs to come back, cook for you, and suck your d1ck. Mandatory.

You are right. However, OP is going to want to try anyway. This is the roadmap.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Ah the classic timeless universal story about how your female wants to be the alpha in your sweet loving relationships.

So whose gonna wear the pants? Whose gonna have the balls? Whose gonna walk with the big swinging c0ck? Her or you?

 

[Atom Smasher]

How many times did you reject her attempts at holding your hand before you allowed it?

Probably 2. I also kept physical distance and removed my attention from her for maybe 20 minutes. This is a great gal. That’s all it took.