"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Porn doesnt turn me on

Thread starter Adma
Start date Oct 13, 2008

A

Adma

Don Juan

#1

I dont know why but i just dont feel anything for porn. I mean i can watch it and enjoy it but i dont neccesarily get excited over it.

I have to see the girl in person to feel "hard" is this normal?

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

F

Fallen

Don Juan

#2

Absolutely!

G

Groovy

Master Don Juan

#3

That's good!

Being a porn addict must suck bad. I bet it has nothing to do with real life. Then you can only get on to porn... It should be exactly the other way around.

I personally can't understand how some guys can jack off to their onietisis or girls they met in real life. That never ocurred to me.

E

everywomanshero

Master Don Juan

#4

Watching porn isn't a good idea anyway. I've had several people tell me that they ended up sleeping with giant, amazon women because they got so horned out from watching porn they had to find someone right then. I saw a picture of one of these beasts, uggggh, man was it nasty as ****

B

bigjohnson

Master Don Juan

#5

Porn is different to each person anyway. Best use for it in my experience is if you find something *she* is into it can often lead to some pretty wild adventures.

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

N

noirsake

Don Juan

#6

everywomanshero said:
Watching porn isn't a good idea anyway. I've had several people tell me that they ended up sleeping with giant, amazon women because they got so horned out from watching porn they had to find someone right then. I saw a picture of one of these beasts, uggggh, man was it nasty as ****

Yeah this is VERY true. My friend that jacks to porn 4 times a day (no joke) would fvck anything he got his hands on. He's admitted to it too. How sad.

N

nightcrawler

Senior Don Juan

#7

Adma said:
I dont know why but i just dont feel anything for porn. I mean i can watch it and enjoy it but i dont neccesarily get excited over it.

I have to see the girl in person to feel "hard" is this normal?

try gay porn and report back.

D

Darth

Master Don Juan

#8

You are perfectly normal and healthy in fact.

I am the same way. I don't do porn, but the couple of times I have seen it my first instinct was to avert my eyes. It just doesn't arouse me at all.

A pretty chick with nice clothes that I see in person on turns me on way more than porn.

D

DrD77

Senior Don Juan

#9

Good for you guys. I became addicted to porn and I'm in the process of quitting. I use to binge on for up to 4 hours at a time looking at porn. Then afterwards I felt DISGUSTED. It's not worth it, porn does no good for you. It was just a brief high that I wanted because I was depressed about not having a girlfriend. I still have no girls, but porn is not the answer. I found that the more I looked at porn, the further and further getting a girlfriend is.

Paintballguy

Master Don Juan

#10

Darth said:
A pretty chick with nice clothes that I see in person on turns me on way more than porn.

I agree. I think it is the whole tease thing. When you watch porn, everything is just out there right away. IE, the girl is butt ass naked getting rammed in under 10 seconds. Rather then seeing a hot girl in public thinking "damn i'd love to see her naked". Thats just my opinion anyways.

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

C

CapedCrusader08

Banned

#11

I am concerned porn is becoming a problem. I stay in and jack off,even when I told myself I won't. I spent so much time doing that, and I have no girls currently. This is killing me.

F

FairShake

Master Don Juan

#12

Nothing wrong with it. In fact, it can be helpful for new things to try.

R

Rex Man

Master Don Juan

#13

Porn is the game-killer. Instant gratification can screw with your mind. If I had a porn addiction, I would donate 5$ to charity everytime I 'relapsed'.

D

DonJuan11

Master Don Juan

#14

Paintballguy said:
When you watch porn, everything is just out there right away. IE, the girl is butt ass naked getting rammed in under 10 seconds. Rather then seeing a hot girl in public thinking "damn i'd love to see her naked". Thats just my opinion anyways.

LOL. Watching Jessica Simpson having sex like the movie Basic Instinct would turn me on more than seeing a girl with clothes on going to work Monday morning at 8:30 am.

Porn doesn't hurt, and if you watch it all day and night, then yes, you may have a problem. Some girls I know have said the sex they have with a guy who doesn't watch porn has sucked beyond belief and the sex with the guys who watch porn has been pretty good. Just something to think about.

T

toddlips

Banned

#15

CapedCrusader08 said:
I am concerned porn is becoming a problem. I stay in and jack off,even when I told myself I won't. I spent so much time doing that, and I have no girls currently. This is killing me.

Get a job man! I hear driving a cab is a great way of making a living. :rock:

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

B

brewbaron

Don Juan

#16

I don't think porn is necessarily a bad thing. like most things it takes some self-control. don't spend over x amount of minutes looking at porn, don't wack it more than x number of times a week. having said that I agree with the poster who said a beautiful woman in real life trounces porn in every way, there is no comparison.

J

Junkyard

Don Juan

#17

Everything in moderation. Its tough sometimes, especially when your staying in on a weekend night and u get super horny lol

R

Randallpink83

Master Don Juan

#18

muhuwahaha said:
try gay porn and report back.

hahaha - good stuff

F

Forty0ztoFreedom

Senior Don Juan

#19

Count me in on the "porn is not worth it" bandwagon. Things like sexual exhaustion and retarded ejaculation are real, growing issues. And they seem to have been spiking since the internet got real big. Hmmmm . .

For me though, the biggest issue is the de-sensitizing it does. When a pair of boobs seems like old news to you, you have a problem. Personally I've cut way back, but caved in last Saturday. Oh well.

Rollo Tomassi

Master Don Juan

#20

Porn is for married men who's wives got fat and/or wont put out anymore.

Get busy ƒucking real women gentlemen. Sex is in your bedroom, not on the monitor.

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

You must log in or register to reply here.

22 Rules for Massive Success With Women

This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.

Accept Learn more…

Top