"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Platform Decay

Deep Dish

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I recently learned about a theory of platform decay. It applies to social media, but also Amazon, Spotify, and ride sharing apps.

First, a platform is good to users, to draw people in.

Then, once enough people are locked in, they will screw over users to cater to business users. Once businesses are locked in, they will screw over business users to seize all value for itself.

Then, the platform dies.

Cory Doctorow, who calls this ensh*ttification, has said this is the inevitable consequence of a dual buyer and seller market.

This just happened with Spotify which now will not pay royalties to musicians who are deemed to not generate enough listens, screwing over small musicians.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Serenity

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It's the consequence of practically being a monopoly. What alternative is there? There are competitors, but they can't really compete.

For social media an alternative platform is worthless if their friends and followers aren't even on it. On Spotify users won't switch because no other platform can offer that much music, the artists won't switch because no other platform can offer that many listeners. YouTube also has this problem, viewers stay because that's where their favorite content creators are, the content creators stay because that's where their viewers are.

What all these platforms have in common is that they don't produce anything, they just facilitate a very convenient way for buyers and seller to meet in one place, while leeching a cut from everyone. Their entire value lies in a lot of people using their service, which is also why it's near impossible to compete. It's a catch-22, to realistically compete you need a ton of users to give value to your platform, but you need value on your platform to get a ton of users.
 

SW15

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Caleb Jones (Alpha Male 2.0, formerly Blackdragon) had a similar model discussing platform decay with online dating platforms.

 

Serenity

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It's just a new form of planned obsolescence. Capitalism at it's finest.
I would say it's the opposite of planned obsolescence. Physical products need to become unusable after a time to motivate the customer to get the new model. Online platforms seek to do the opposite, keep you using it for as long as possible while they milk as much value as they can out of you.

In most cases you're not even the customer on these platforms, you're the product to be sold.
 

The Duke

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So what happened to Myspace? Does the decay theory apply?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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