Plate is baiting me HARD

[Dash Riprock]

This experience may help some SS newbies;

Met this girl via OLD a couple months ago. 33, very hot, model, probably HB8+. We hit it off and I told her I'm not looking for a girlfriend or LTR. I'm NSA and FWB only. But, I told her I do enjoy treating to dinner, theater, events, trips and like to hike and ski--because I like to do those things. She said that all sounded good. We started hanging out every other weekend for the last couple months (single mom, joint custody of kids--arrangement worked great for me). The s*ex really rocked, was awesome. Good connection too. We went out to eat a few times, drank margaritas and would come back and smash. She even bought me a quart of good whiskey, chocolate eggs, and massage oil for Easter Sunday. I got her nothing. My gut said she was interested in boyfriend status with me. Just got that gut feel. In between her coming over, we would meet for lunch once/week as we work in the same building (ironically) in downtown Denver. I'm there 1-2x week.

Had lunch last week Wednesday, had some laughs, good talk. We set a date for Sunday to hike, eat, hang out. I get a text first thing Thursday morning thanking me for lunch, hope my day went well, cannot see me on Sunday, "Sorry" she writes. No reason, no alternative date mentioned. My reply: NO REPLY. She's out and I'm done. Flake and you're OUT. It's been NC ever since.

Now, last night, I see her looking at my OLD profile. She uploaded new pics, quite sexy. I didn't even know it was her until I looked because she changed her main profile pic. She even favorites me last night on the OLD site. Now, I see she checked out my profile again a few minutes ago today.

Lesson: Don't ever chase, drop them cold if they flake without a reason or a counter date, and ALWAYS GO and stay NC. Don't put up with immature, trash woman BS.

Who knows what the f*uck happened and frankly I don't care. I'm just amused at how the female mind works: want what they can't have, drives them crazy when the guy goes NC and/or acts indifferent, will keep throwing crumbs and bait to try to get the guy to reach out--just so they can deny him again. It's actually pretty f*ucking sad.

If she wants to plan and pay for a date with s*ex included, then maybe. Otherwise, I won't ever be reaching out.


F*ucking hilarious.

 

[marmel75]

I dont see anything surprising, this happens quite often. Basically there is a time limit where she expects things to progress and if you dont want to she will move on to someone who does want that.

FWB situations are always very fluid. They all have an expiration date. She must have really liked you for it to last that long, most don't.

There is no blame to go around here. She wants a more serious relationship. You don't. Nothing wrong with either sides position, it simply means at this point you two are incompatible long term.

 

[Smartone84]

Had lunch last week Wednesday, had some laughs, good talk. We set a date for Sunday to hike, eat, hang out. I get a text first thing Thursday morning thanking me for lunch, hope my day went well, cannot see me on Sunday, "Sorry" she writes. No reason, no alternative date mentioned. My reply: NO REPLY. She's out and I'm done. Flake and you're OUT. It's been NC ever since.

Now, last night, I see her looking at my OLD profile. She uploaded new pics, quite sexy. I didn't even know it was her until I looked because she changed her main profile pic. She even favorites me last night on the OLD site. Now, I see she checked out my profile again a few minutes ago today.

Lesson: Don't ever chase, drop them cold if they flake without a reason or a counter date, and ALWAYS GO and stay NC. Don't put up with immature, trash woman BS.

Who knows what the f*uck happened and frankly I don't care. I'm just amused at how the female mind works: want what they can't have

I know I don't have to tell you this, but these are the types of women where you don't want a relationship anyway (even if you did). Flaking like that and then pulling baby games with OLD to follow (make no mistake at least part of the reason the new hot pics were uploaded was to grab your attention) is basically the definition of immature. Looks like you made the right decision in making her a f-ck buddy from the start. Give yourself a pat on the back there. That being said, nothing a woman would do at this point would surprise me, and especially not this.

 

[guru1000]

This experience may help some SS newbies;

Met this girl via OLD a couple months ago. 33, very hot, model, probably HB8+. We hit it off and I told her I'm not looking for a girlfriend or LTR. I'm NSA and FWB only. But, I told her I do enjoy treating to dinner, theater, events, trips and like to hike and ski--because I like to do those things. She said that all sounded good. We started hanging out every other weekend for the last couple months (single mom, joint custody of kids--arrangement worked great for me). The s*ex really rocked, was awesome. Good connection too. We went out to eat a few times, drank margaritas and would come back and smash. She even bought me a quart of good whiskey, chocolate eggs, and massage oil for Easter Sunday. I got her nothing. My gut said she was interested in boyfriend status with me. Just got that gut feel. In between her coming over, we would meet for lunch once/week as we work in the same building (ironically) in downtown Denver. I'm there 1-2x week.

Had lunch last week Wednesday, had some laughs, good talk. We set a date for Sunday to hike, eat, hang out. I get a text first thing Thursday morning thanking me for lunch, hope my day went well, cannot see me on Sunday, "Sorry" she writes. No reason, no alternative date mentioned. My reply: NO REPLY. She's out and I'm done. Flake and you're OUT. It's been NC ever since.

Now, last night, I see her looking at my OLD profile. She uploaded new pics, quite sexy. I didn't even know it was her until I looked because she changed her main profile pic. She even favorites me last night on the OLD site. Now, I see she checked out my profile again a few minutes ago today.

Lesson: Don't ever chase, drop them cold if they flake without a reason or a counter date, and ALWAYS GO and stay NC. Don't put up with immature, trash woman BS.

Who knows what the f*uck happened and frankly I don't care. I'm just amused at how the female mind works: want what they can't have, drives them crazy when the guy goes NC and/or acts indifferent, will keep throwing crumbs and bait to try to get the guy to reach out--just so they can deny him again. It's actually pretty f*ucking sad.

If she wants to plan and pay for a date with s*ex included, then maybe. Otherwise, I won't ever be reaching out.


F*ucking hilarious.

Most men don’t understand the power silence and distance employ. The message you sent, although covert, is powerful.

Now she feels she fvxked up, without your even having sent a word. If she wanted exclusivity, she could have requested it, but she didn’t. Instead she elected to play this game. And you walk away like a champ.

Me thinks she will reach out to you within the month.

When she does, IF you’re still interested, just request a meet at the first text. She’s not deserving of any more time and attention until she redresses her behavior.

IF you are no longer interested, you kept a strong frame, which will benefit you immensely in your future dealings with women.

 

[Smartone84]

Most men don’t understand the power silence and distance employ.

I didn't have this part of my game completely down until recently and it's been an absolute joy to read some stories including this one showing how well it all really works once applied.

 

[TheGambino]

This experience may help some SS newbies;

Met this girl via OLD a couple months ago. 33, very hot, model, probably HB8+. We hit it off and I told her I'm not looking for a girlfriend or LTR. I'm NSA and FWB only. But, I told her I do enjoy treating to dinner, theater, events, trips and like to hike and ski--because I like to do those things. She said that all sounded good. We started hanging out every other weekend for the last couple months (single mom, joint custody of kids--arrangement worked great for me). The s*ex really rocked, was awesome. Good connection too. We went out to eat a few times, drank margaritas and would come back and smash. She even bought me a quart of good whiskey, chocolate eggs, and massage oil for Easter Sunday. I got her nothing. My gut said she was interested in boyfriend status with me. Just got that gut feel. In between her coming over, we would meet for lunch once/week as we work in the same building (ironically) in downtown Denver. I'm there 1-2x week.

Had lunch last week Wednesday, had some laughs, good talk. We set a date for Sunday to hike, eat, hang out. I get a text first thing Thursday morning thanking me for lunch, hope my day went well, cannot see me on Sunday, "Sorry" she writes. No reason, no alternative date mentioned. My reply: NO REPLY. She's out and I'm done. Flake and you're OUT. It's been NC ever since.

Now, last night, I see her looking at my OLD profile. She uploaded new pics, quite sexy. I didn't even know it was her until I looked because she changed her main profile pic. She even favorites me last night on the OLD site. Now, I see she checked out my profile again a few minutes ago today.

Lesson: Don't ever chase, drop them cold if they flake without a reason or a counter date, and ALWAYS GO and stay NC. Don't put up with immature, trash woman BS.

Who knows what the f*uck happened and frankly I don't care. I'm just amused at how the female mind works: want what they can't have, drives them crazy when the guy goes NC and/or acts indifferent, will keep throwing crumbs and bait to try to get the guy to reach out--just so they can deny him again. It's actually pretty f*ucking sad.

If she wants to plan and pay for a date with s*ex included, then maybe. Otherwise, I won't ever be reaching out.


F*ucking hilarious.

Word

 

[Toddz]

Single mom = pump and dump

enough said

 

[Roober]

While I do agree with your approach, I dont think this qualifies as trash BS. She decided that your guys situation no longer worked for her, and chose to part ways.

Could she have communicated that a bit better? Sure, but so could you.

 

[guru1000]

Could she have communicated that a bit better? Sure, but so could you.

She did communicate ... by her action. And so did he.

If she had a grievance, she could have brought it overtly. But she didn't.

Alternatively, it could be argued that he could have said, "What's up? What's on your mind." And resolve the issue, and tell her next time to communicate her grievance. But what would be the underlying message in "his being the bigger man"? That the only consequence if she wishes to sleight again will be his initiation of, "Let's talk." Hardly a frame any man should enter.

She must redress her behavior so they can have a normal functioning relation. And if redress is not possible (as they are simply incompatible in relational propriety), Dash's best option is to walk away entirely. And so he did.

 

[The Duke]

How good looking are some of you guys that you can pull a model off OLD? I have dated some good looking women but not even close to that on OLD. I mean if she's an 8 youd have to be a 10 in looks.

Disagree, I'm probably a 7.5 and have dated several models from OLD. I live in a city known for lots of attractive women so maybe that helps.


I'm not at all surprised by her behavior. Pretty typical of a lot of females. Although I don't care for her actions, she did communicate. Just happened to be very covert, indirect, weak, and immature. I imagine she is a personality that doesn't like confrontation.

If this was me I would reach out and open the door to find out what is actually on her mind. Never good to assume, and you can always learn something about personality and behavior that will serve you well down the road. Don't see how doing so would be loosing frame unless you can't stay calm. Conflict resolution is a noteworthy skill.

And something @Amante Silvestre said fits this situation very well:
If you want to come off as a man who does not tolerate certain things, if you want to convey a message to a woman, if you want to get to the root of an issue, you can just as easily do so with some curt discussion inside of 5 minutes.

 

[Roober]

She did communicate ... by her action. And so did he.

If she had a grievance, she could have brought it overtly. But she didn't.

Alternatively, it could be argued that he could have said, "What's up? What's on your mind." And resolve the issue, and tell her next time to communicate her grievance. But what would be the underlying message in "his being the bigger man"? That the only consequence if she wishes to sleight again will be his initiation of, "Let's talk." Hardly a frame any man should enter.

She must redress her behavior so they can have a normal functioning relation. And if redress is not possible (as they are simply incompatible in relational propriety), Dash's best option is to walk away entirely. And so he did.

The whole situation just doesn't make sense. He said fwb or nsa only, meets with her regularly for lunch (how is this fwb?), sexes her a couple times, over the course of a couple months. I would certainly qualify that as sending mixed signals. She flakes on a date and gets zero response from him, a guy whom she has spent several months with.

Anything would be better than complete radio silence. It just makes him appear like a spoiled little kid that didn't get his way. Choosing to leave a bad situation, does that make her trash? I certainly dont think so. It comes from the false expectation that the feminine should communicate overtly, when in fact that is the masculine role.

And the fact that he goes on to claim how much he doesn't care, but then comes and makes a post about this woman. If he doesn't care, he wouldn't seek counsel in the group here while he attempts to validate the correctness of his decision.

And the title, "the plate is baiting me HARD", which I dont observe at all. All I really see here is more ego preservation.

 

[guru1000]

The whole situation just doesn't make sense. He said fwb or nsa only, meets with her regularly for lunch (how is this fwb?), sexes her a couple times, over the course of a couple months. I would certainly qualify that as sending mixed signals. She flakes on a date and gets zero response from him, a guy whom she has spent several months with.

Anything would be better than complete radio silence. It just makes him appear like a spoiled little kid that didn't get his way. Choosing to leave a bad situation, does that make her trash? I certainly dont think so. It comes from the false expectation that the feminine should communicate overtly, when in fact that is the masculine role.

And the fact that he goes on to claim how much he doesn't care, but then comes and makes a post about this woman. If he doesn't care, he wouldn't seek counsel in the group here while he attempts to validate the correctness of his decision.

And the title, "the plate is baiting me HARD", which I dont observe at all. All I really see here is more ego preservation.

She--a mere plate--cancelled a date with no reason, no counter-offer, no followup, with zero-fvck regard for seeing him again, and then surfaces his OLD profile with new pics to incite him into orbit? LOL.

I wouldn't call her trash, but this is certainly not a girl I would want on my team.

More men can learn from this. Good job Dash.

 

[sazc]

(assumption)
She got tired of feeling like his best option for "today"/"the moment". She felt this was disrespectful given the length of their personal interaction, So she decided to employ a little 'silence and distance' to really determine if he gives a sh1t. To see if absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Is it a sh1t test? Could be, maybe not. The difference has yet to be seen - does she have enough self esteem to stay silent, deciding not to be someone's long term cvm dumpster. Or will she break no contact first?

It doesn't really matter. OP didn't want anything deep with this one - he got what he wanted. It's so 'not deep' she refuses to talk to him and tell him what's up with her.

He classified her as a plate. Time to move on, there's nothing here for him, no depth - just the way he wanted it.

 

[The Duke]

Which is just a reward since they enjoy dramatic conversations (some more than others).

When the conversation becomes too dramatic you give her a warning. If the drama continues you end the discussion right there. She can either come to the table or be put out to pasture.

 

[guru1000]

(assumption)
She got tired of feeling like his best option for "today"/"the moment". She felt this was disrespectful given the length of their personal interaction, So she decided to employ a little 'silence and distance' to really determine if he gives a sh1t. To see if absence makes the heart grow fonder.

In other words, manipulation. Could very well be.

 

[sazc]

In other words, manipulation. Could very well be.

Women do orbit men. If OPs gut feeling is correct, this one sounds like she started orbiting, and giving up the goods, in the hopes that OP would find enough value in her to make her an LTR.

Enough time passed and she started to feel that, despite her best efforts, OP was never going to find her high value enough to make her a real option. So she decided to break orbit.

It is what it is.

Could be a test/manipulation. Could be that she's just done with him because she wants to be.

Who knows

I definitely don't see that she is "playing OP hard", unless (perhaps) OP has the feelz, and/or he became too reliant on this pvssy.

Can't do that with plates.

 

[The Duke]

Dash stated his intentions from the start. She should have cut ties at that point if she didn't agree with it.

Rest assured the next dude will be beta and forced to wine and dine her ass for 2months before she lets him even sniff those panties.

 

[sazc]

Dash stated his intentions from the start. She should have cut ties at that point if she didn't agree with it.

Rest assured the next dude will be beta and forced to wine and dine her ass for 2months before she lets him even sniff those panties.

Just like women tell men "LJBF", but men orbit anyways, hoping she'll change her mind, women orbit for the same reason.

Hopefully she will do a little self examination and raise her panty dropping standards, and also learn to listen to what people say, instead of thinking she can change them.

Then again, maybe OP just got old? Maybe she cultivated another Chad into wanting an LTR and that's why the silence.

Thousands of potential reasons. No way to know what the reason really is.

 

[The Duke]

Just like women tell men "LJBF", but men orbit anyways, hoping she'll change her mind, women orbit for the same reason.

Just curious, what percentage of the male population would be a willing orbiter if they thought the potential was there? I see most dudes as beta fag's. I don't hang out with girls that don't want to fuhk me!

I'd say 80% of females are willing to orbit.

 

[guru1000]

Enough time passed and she started to feel that, despite her best efforts, OP was never going to find her high value enough to make her a real option. So she decided to break orbit.

It is what it is.

.

Men read this over and over again.

This is the predominate thought in the female mind. This is why when she inquires of your intent, it's best to state, "I'm open to anything. I'm fluid. Let's see where things go. I just like to take things slow."

By doing this you meet her most primal need, which is for emotional reliability. IF a women feels she cannot emotionally invest into you (as she feels you are using her), some might very well pull this same manipulative tactic upon you.

Always give them hope. And you are not being (the socially-shamed) "dishonorable" in doing so ... there is always a chance.