scrouds
Master Don Juan
Now is a good time to get some friends if you don't have any. Smith and Wesson, Ruger, Kimber, Glock, all come to mind, and many more
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Yeah, at least be prepared in the event something happens, which I doubt.3countriesPlan said:Protect yourself -- get some mace at least and stay vigilant not cause you are scared but cause losers have nothing to lose. Then, keep records of all the correspondance you have with him and her if you can keep it. Then if you are really on top of the game you can make a call to your lawyer and ask what you should do that would benefit you in a court of law if anything were to pop off.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Aristippus said:you should never flirt with married women . . . . It's not right...
Scrouds, do you understand why Aristippus wins hands down? Because you recognize that there's a question of moral right and wrong, and phrase your response in a defensive manner -- you understand that your position will be strongly attacked. OTOH, Aristippus proffers the rule without hesitation or doubt. Even if I had no moral compass, I'd recognize the difference between someone talking from a position of strength, and one of weakness.scrouds said:You didn't do anything wrong flirting with a married chick
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
why should I accept your version of moralityDown Low said:Hmm. Which one sounds correct?
Scrouds, do you understand why Aristippus wins hands down? Because you recognize that there's a question of moral right and wrong, and phrase your response in a defensive manner -- you understand that your position will be strongly attacked. OTOH, Aristippus proffers the rule without hesitation or doubt. Even if I had no moral compass, I'd recognize the difference between someone talking from a position of strength, and one of weakness.
"Version" of morality? Morality isn't some kind of buffet from which you may pick and choose whatever language and behavior to use in front of children, old people, women, etc. Your very language tells us that you clearly understand that you are pandering moral degeneracy.scrouds said:why should I accept your version of morality
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
I've never bought into the "harmless flirting" concept. We are emotional creatures, and a harmless flirt today can easily go over the edge when one feels unappreciated, slighted, unloved, fill in anything else.zekko said:I've found that most married women will flirt a bit, and I have several married male friends who are huge shameless over the top flirts including overtly sexual remarks. Rollo has recommended flirting while you are married, and especially in front of your wife.
I don't think a little harmless flirting is a bad thing, for either gender, but there is definitely a line you don't cross. Whether or not the OP crossed that line is difficult to say since we don't have all the details.
Can you live there... will you live there with me?Atom Smasher said:I've never bought into the "harmless flirting" concept. We are emotional creatures, and a harmless flirt today can easily go over the edge when one feels unappreciated, slighted, unloved, fill in anything else.
That "line you don't cross" will be dictated by the emotion of the moment (for both genders) and can be as mercurial as emotions themselves. It's a dangerous place to be in.
yeah i'm with you.Atom Smasher said:I've never bought into the "harmless flirting" concept. We are emotional creatures, and a harmless flirt today can easily go over the edge when one feels unappreciated, slighted, unloved, fill in anything else.
That "line you don't cross" will be dictated by the emotion of the moment (for both genders) and can be as mercurial as emotions themselves. It's a dangerous place to be in.
Agreed. Once you actually realize that most men out there are just venting their emotional insecurities, it nearly becomes irrelevant. I would have just ignored his message.( . )( . ) said:Betas gonna beta.
It's true these losers can sometimes be quite dangerous when they snap, most of the time they are kittens though. Personally I would never have apologized.
Yes. I feel that a man's projected "suaveness" is sufficient to let a man's spouse know that he is in demand. It's like having a saber but never needing to rattle it.backbreaker said:yeah i'm with you.
I mean, if i walked into say the mall and saw some dude chatting up my wife and she was being polite and talking back, i have zero issue with that.
if she's all out flirting, playing touchy feely, making innuendos, she can harmlessly find her a new place to live.
it's a blanet sign of disrespect.
and "they started it" is not a viable excuse. I get hit on and you learn how to deflect. "I appreciate the compliment but I'm happily married"
I think there is a fine line between knowning you can flirt with girls and actually flirting with girls. There are plenty girls, well i don't want to sound like Hugh heffner or anything but i have an idea of if it came to it how i could flirt with and probably get a date if i had to today. but i dont' actually firt wtih them beucase that's disrespectful to my wife.
i spun plates with the best of them but once you decide to get in a real relationship you need to end that. that's how i feel. I'm a conversationalist, but i don't flirt or even let situations become escalated.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.