scrouds
Master Don Juan
Now is a good time to get some friends if you don't have any. Smith and Wesson, Ruger, Kimber, Glock, all come to mind, and many more
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Yeah, at least be prepared in the event something happens, which I doubt.3countriesPlan said:Protect yourself -- get some mace at least and stay vigilant not cause you are scared but cause losers have nothing to lose. Then, keep records of all the correspondance you have with him and her if you can keep it. Then if you are really on top of the game you can make a call to your lawyer and ask what you should do that would benefit you in a court of law if anything were to pop off.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Aristippus said:you should never flirt with married women . . . . It's not right...
Scrouds, do you understand why Aristippus wins hands down? Because you recognize that there's a question of moral right and wrong, and phrase your response in a defensive manner -- you understand that your position will be strongly attacked. OTOH, Aristippus proffers the rule without hesitation or doubt. Even if I had no moral compass, I'd recognize the difference between someone talking from a position of strength, and one of weakness.scrouds said:You didn't do anything wrong flirting with a married chick
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
why should I accept your version of moralityDown Low said:Hmm. Which one sounds correct?
Scrouds, do you understand why Aristippus wins hands down? Because you recognize that there's a question of moral right and wrong, and phrase your response in a defensive manner -- you understand that your position will be strongly attacked. OTOH, Aristippus proffers the rule without hesitation or doubt. Even if I had no moral compass, I'd recognize the difference between someone talking from a position of strength, and one of weakness.
"Version" of morality? Morality isn't some kind of buffet from which you may pick and choose whatever language and behavior to use in front of children, old people, women, etc. Your very language tells us that you clearly understand that you are pandering moral degeneracy.scrouds said:why should I accept your version of morality
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
I've never bought into the "harmless flirting" concept. We are emotional creatures, and a harmless flirt today can easily go over the edge when one feels unappreciated, slighted, unloved, fill in anything else.zekko said:I've found that most married women will flirt a bit, and I have several married male friends who are huge shameless over the top flirts including overtly sexual remarks. Rollo has recommended flirting while you are married, and especially in front of your wife.
I don't think a little harmless flirting is a bad thing, for either gender, but there is definitely a line you don't cross. Whether or not the OP crossed that line is difficult to say since we don't have all the details.
Can you live there... will you live there with me?Atom Smasher said:I've never bought into the "harmless flirting" concept. We are emotional creatures, and a harmless flirt today can easily go over the edge when one feels unappreciated, slighted, unloved, fill in anything else.
That "line you don't cross" will be dictated by the emotion of the moment (for both genders) and can be as mercurial as emotions themselves. It's a dangerous place to be in.
yeah i'm with you.Atom Smasher said:I've never bought into the "harmless flirting" concept. We are emotional creatures, and a harmless flirt today can easily go over the edge when one feels unappreciated, slighted, unloved, fill in anything else.
That "line you don't cross" will be dictated by the emotion of the moment (for both genders) and can be as mercurial as emotions themselves. It's a dangerous place to be in.
Agreed. Once you actually realize that most men out there are just venting their emotional insecurities, it nearly becomes irrelevant. I would have just ignored his message.( . )( . ) said:Betas gonna beta.
It's true these losers can sometimes be quite dangerous when they snap, most of the time they are kittens though. Personally I would never have apologized.
Yes. I feel that a man's projected "suaveness" is sufficient to let a man's spouse know that he is in demand. It's like having a saber but never needing to rattle it.backbreaker said:yeah i'm with you.
I mean, if i walked into say the mall and saw some dude chatting up my wife and she was being polite and talking back, i have zero issue with that.
if she's all out flirting, playing touchy feely, making innuendos, she can harmlessly find her a new place to live.
it's a blanet sign of disrespect.
and "they started it" is not a viable excuse. I get hit on and you learn how to deflect. "I appreciate the compliment but I'm happily married"
I think there is a fine line between knowning you can flirt with girls and actually flirting with girls. There are plenty girls, well i don't want to sound like Hugh heffner or anything but i have an idea of if it came to it how i could flirt with and probably get a date if i had to today. but i dont' actually firt wtih them beucase that's disrespectful to my wife.
i spun plates with the best of them but once you decide to get in a real relationship you need to end that. that's how i feel. I'm a conversationalist, but i don't flirt or even let situations become escalated.
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.