Master Don Juan
- May 31, 2020
- Reaction score
The wall isn't always a wall with a woman in her 30s. Most women in their 30s post 2010 seem to be experiencing a padded cushion instead of a brick wall. They are still hotly pursued if they are using swipe apps.I think even their expectations that they project are really just excuses to push men away the way they have pushed men away their entire lives bc no one was ever good enough supposedly, out of literally 100+ guys. High standards can be a way to facilitate Avoidant attachment.
what I experience is that the wall is not so much in their looks but in their mental health. It's impossible to tolerate a neurotic mental patient in my free time. to the extent they can keep it together long enough to sit down and talk then the dates are boring job interviews and they seem hyper aware of power dynamics even within a single conversation. There is almost no sign of flirting or femininity at all.
There is a lot of weirdness in this cohort. I've mainly interacted with a 30 something women who have never been married and have no kids. I think the worst ones are the big career ones. The women with the demanding white collar careers are the least feminine ones. I once had a date with a 35 year old woman who spent weekends traveling to EDM festivals in other cities. Although she didn't have an overwhelmingly demanding career, she was a bit unstable. No second date there.
A lot of the 30 something women I've interacted with don't make relational development a priority. Relational development falls beneath her job, her friends, Fluffy the Cat/Fido the Dog's needs, etc. Although childless women in their 30s face some degree of social exclusion, they typically have more friends than childless men in their 30s.
I try really hard avoid boring job interview topics of conversation on first dates. Sometimes it works, but there are times where some of the 30 something women won't lighten up.
There's also a contingent of 30 something women who are looking to have babies fast, and that's a non-starter with me. I don't think that's been the majority of my interactions, but it is out there. If there is a contingent that feel that way, they generally hide it well.