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Over 30 DJ's

Jack12345

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"Finding a good woman in her 30's is like finding a parking space... All the good ones are taken and the remaining ones are handicapped."
You need to look at younger girls because youre at the peak of your sexuality, a guy who becoming a man. Doesnt mean you wont find hot girls at their 30's, but putting your focus on these type will gradually suck your energy and keep you stagnating. You cant blame the women, this is their biology clock. The handicapped term is out of context and feels desperate and negative - two things you should avoid
 

LARaiders85

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Looks like at least some of what I'm experiencing in my 30s is inevitable and not just due to tech. Oh well.
 

SW15

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Looks like at least some of what I'm experiencing in my 30s is inevitable and not just due to tech. Oh well.
The element that I find most frustrating when dealing with women in their 30s is that they have sky high expectations still, as if they were still in their 20s. If you do meet 30 something women on apps, they are being pursued as hotly as 20 something women. They have no shortage of options, plus they get naturally more fussy.

What are you experiencing with 30 something women now?
 

LARaiders85

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The element that I find most frustrating when dealing with women in their 30s is that they have sky high expectations still, as if they were still in their 20s. If you do meet 30 something women on apps, they are being pursued as hotly as 20 something women. They have no shortage of options, plus they get naturally more fussy.

What are you experiencing with 30 something women now?
I think even their expectations that they project are really just excuses to push men away the way they have pushed men away their entire lives bc no one was ever good enough supposedly, out of literally 100+ guys. High standards can be a way to facilitate Avoidant attachment.

what I experience is that the wall is not so much in their looks but in their mental health. It's impossible to tolerate a neurotic mental patient in my free time. to the extent they can keep it together long enough to sit down and talk then the dates are boring job interviews and they seem hyper aware of power dynamics even within a single conversation. There is almost no sign of flirting or femininity at all.
 

SW15

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I think even their expectations that they project are really just excuses to push men away the way they have pushed men away their entire lives bc no one was ever good enough supposedly, out of literally 100+ guys. High standards can be a way to facilitate Avoidant attachment.

what I experience is that the wall is not so much in their looks but in their mental health. It's impossible to tolerate a neurotic mental patient in my free time. to the extent they can keep it together long enough to sit down and talk then the dates are boring job interviews and they seem hyper aware of power dynamics even within a single conversation. There is almost no sign of flirting or femininity at all.
The wall isn't always a wall with a woman in her 30s. Most women in their 30s post 2010 seem to be experiencing a padded cushion instead of a brick wall. They are still hotly pursued if they are using swipe apps.

There is a lot of weirdness in this cohort. I've mainly interacted with a 30 something women who have never been married and have no kids. I think the worst ones are the big career ones. The women with the demanding white collar careers are the least feminine ones. I once had a date with a 35 year old woman who spent weekends traveling to EDM festivals in other cities. Although she didn't have an overwhelmingly demanding career, she was a bit unstable. No second date there.

A lot of the 30 something women I've interacted with don't make relational development a priority. Relational development falls beneath her job, her friends, Fluffy the Cat/Fido the Dog's needs, etc. Although childless women in their 30s face some degree of social exclusion, they typically have more friends than childless men in their 30s.

I try really hard avoid boring job interview topics of conversation on first dates. Sometimes it works, but there are times where some of the 30 something women won't lighten up.

There's also a contingent of 30 something women who are looking to have babies fast, and that's a non-starter with me. I don't think that's been the majority of my interactions, but it is out there. If there is a contingent that feel that way, they generally hide it well.
 

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LARaiders85

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The wall isn't always a wall with a woman in her 30s. Most women in their 30s post 2010 seem to be experiencing a padded cushion instead of a brick wall. They are still hotly pursued if they are using swipe apps.

There is a lot of weirdness in this cohort. I've mainly interacted with a 30 something women who have never been married and have no kids. I think the worst ones are the big career ones. The women with the demanding white collar careers are the least feminine ones. I once had a date with a 35 year old woman who spent weekends traveling to EDM festivals in other cities. Although she didn't have an overwhelmingly demanding career, she was a bit unstable. No second date there.

A lot of the 30 something women I've interacted with don't make relational development a priority. Relational development falls beneath her job, her friends, Fluffy the Cat/Fido the Dog's needs, etc. Although childless women in their 30s face some degree of social exclusion, they typically have more friends than childless men in their 30s.

I try really hard avoid boring job interview topics of conversation on first dates. Sometimes it works, but there are times where some of the 30 something women won't lighten up.

There's also a contingent of 30 something women who are looking to have babies fast, and that's a non-starter with me. I don't think that's been the majority of my interactions, but it is out there. If there is a contingent that feel that way, they generally hide it well.
All of your experiences are my experiences honestly except for this one part:

"Although childless women in their 30s face some degree of social exclusion, they typically have more friends than childless men in their 30s."

I actually think that guys have more friends but that's just based on my experience.

I think at the whole idea of women suddenly losing their looks and suddenly everything changes at the wall is sort of a revenge fantasy for Mgtow/incel types. It's not that it doesn't happen but it is seriously sedated in today's market which has plentiful options for even women with no looks at all.
 

SW15

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I think at the whole idea of women suddenly losing their looks and suddenly everything changes at the wall is sort of a revenge fantasy for Mgtow/incel types. It's not that it doesn't happen but it is seriously sedated in today's market which has plentiful options for even women with no looks at all.
Yes. It doesn't change that much. At best, there's a decline after menopause. Within the last 7 years or so, I've heard a few stories from acquaintances of women between 45-60 getting hotly pursued on Match, OurTime, and the more website/non-swipe type like online services. An in shape 50 year old woman will have no problems finding options.

The wall as a concept was probably more realistic in the era before dating websites and later dating apps. Most people have more dates as a result of apps than they would have if they were just dependent upon real life sourcing of dates. It must be said that a lot of these website/app sourced dates are complete garbage. One of the best attributes of cold approach is that in 5 minutes you can figure out if something will work in-person more easily. While this facet reduces the number of total dates, it also does reduce the amount of money wasted on failed dates. Apps are great at producing wasteful spend for men. The 30-39 year old childless women isn't asked out in person as much as she is asked out on apps. However, she still fields a decent amount of cold approaches if she lives in a singles dense neighborhood of a major metropolitan area. Most 30-39 year old single women live in such areas.

One of the most difficult things about dealing with 30-39 year old childless women is their bio clock. They have the massive demands that have been talked about on this thread, and they wish to rush into family formation. Whereas when this woman was 25, she didn't demand a shorter time frame to get to a major life milestone. Rushing into that life milestone is such a bad idea. There can be an advantage to going on a date with a 40 year old woman who has given up on having kids. You'd be much harder pressed to find a 35 year old woman who has given up on the idea of kids. An interaction with a 40 year old woman resigned to no kids has the potential have an more positive vibe because it's not a husband hunting job interview type expedition that you might get with a 32-36 year old. The difficult part there is finding said 40 year old being in good shape.
 

markfromeurope

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I am an 'older' DJ and find that the field of sane (very important disclaimer) women diminishes rapidly with each passing year. It gets exponentially more difficult to find a sane woman without baggage, hangups, emotional problems, bratty kids or other weirdness. Also, as you get out in the world and get the most basic things like a career, house and car, you have a harder time discerning whether she's interested in you or your wallet/possessions.

If a woman is still single/virgin/never been married after age 30, there is something wrong with her. But then again, being able to talk to a potential life companion is important too. You want someone who shares your sensibilities, worldview, intelligence level, sense of morality, work ethic, etc. So that as you get older, you don't really WANT the younger HB's, firm and willing though they may be.

The best time for the hunt is when you're in your 20's and early 30's. After that all you find are women with low interest level who married the guy anyway, then lost interest (surprise!) after they had a kid or two, then get divorced and bitter, blaming "men". There are a LOT of women like that out there: disillusioned but refusing to take the blame for leading on the poor AFC that she loved him, then 'waking up' to the fact that she never loved him, and then wondering what happened. Duh?

There are fine, genuine women out there, but they get scarcer as time goes by.
This is my experience. I am 35.
 

Spaz

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This is my experience. I am 35.
You're back again, Mark, women are not men, they are not supposed to be like men, so with that in mind, they of course act crazy to many men.

For me, all those craziness, if you're able to predict beforehand and use it to ur advantage, it will be a source of unending amusement.

You're a smart man....think, turn the situation around instead of complaining.
 

markfromeurope

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You're back again, Mark, women are not men, they are not supposed to be like men, so with that in mind, they of course act crazy to many men.

For me, all those craziness, if you're able to predict beforehand and use it to ur advantage, it will be a source of unending amusement.

You're a smart man....think, turn the situation around instead of complaining.
Yeah, had to do some break from this place.

@Post above - no worries, I am just stating facts and will still try to play against the odds or try to increase the odds in the worsening market available. That's how it works for me - I will never settle. That's not who I am.
 

VictorSleazy

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31 here. Made a commitment to myself only date under 25’s as long as i can. I think it all comes down to how good you take care of yourself. Girls i date say stuff like ”i wish i lookd like that when im 30+”

i hate the stress girls in their 27-30 age bring, you can feel their need to lock you down asap. Much more chill with younger ones
 
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