Out of shape but she/they still like you?

[MoreThanSmooth]

Feeling kinda sh*tty lately because I used to be athletic but work has destroyed my body over the last couple of years.

I still have a pretty good build with the exception of my stomach, which is scarred (old surgery) and fat.

Problem is, I now have a conflict between my opinion of my body and the girls I’m seeing. There’s an absolutely smoking South American girl into me at the moment and she seems to find me hot even with the extra couple of stone I’m carrying. Similarly, I’m getting drinks with a cute hippie chick who tells me I’m “buff” but tbh I feel like she wouldn’t like me naked.

Do I go for bedding these chicks regardless because they like me or should I back off for 6 months until I’m fit? Last thing I want is to take my kit off and get put down because I’m not what they thought I was.

Chicks apparently don’t care much about this stuff but I hate being fat tbh. Hitting the gym but it will take a while.

 

[lamath]

Yeah sure wait until you are fit..........




Hit that now!!!

 

[Glassguy]

If they will fvck you when you're fat, they will still fvck you when you trim down.

Go get it

 

[marmel75]

Womens opinion of what is good shape is a lot lower than ours. I was about 20-25 lbs heavier at one point than my peak shape and I still had women telling me I was very muscular and that I had a great body...

 

[zekko]

Womens opinion of what is good shape is a lot lower than ours. I was about 20-25 lbs heavier at one point than my peak shape and I still had women telling me I was very muscular and that I had a great body...

There seems to be a lot of messages to this effect lately, as opposed to all the "you must get down to 8% body fat so you have a defined jawline" that was so prevalent for so long.

I think it's hard for us to see what women find appealing, because we are attracted to bodies that are smaller than ours. Whereas they appear to like a certain amount of bulk.

 

[flowtheory]

If a woman is giving you warm attention, they are most likely attracted. It’s how you make them feel. As opposed to just how you look. How you look with your shirt of is only a plus to them.
Of course they will choose a lean athletic body over a chubby weak looking bod for the most part. However sometimes that’s not true too, based on how she feels about her body.

But if these women are paying you compliments and showing interest, they already want the D and your out of shape self is irrelevant to them, in the short term at least!

How you feel about yourself in the buff is your opinion, and if it’s not a confident one, address it, because you will carry yourself better.

Plus, if the woman isn’t lean and super good looking herself, many women can be intimidated by a really in shape and good looking male. Naturally females want the limelight on them. They want to be sexier. Gives them a power.

 

[gravityeyelids]

Hell no, don't wait. IMO a guy with a biggish upper body/shoulders but with a little bit of a gut can be just as powerful looking as the ultra ripped guy. Here's the thing about being extremely ripped and muscular - ripped dudes actually look pretty small unless they're wearing a tight shirt (or shirtless obv). Legit physique competitors look kinda shrimpy a lot of the time with anything other than a very well fitted shirt. A lot of this is because when they cut down enough to get competition ready, they just shrink overall. It's EXTREMELY hard to be stupid ripped and look big in a baggy shirt.

Guys with a bit more bodyfat can usually look a lot stronger and be just as dominant. I honestly get a bit jealous sometimes when i see guys at the bar who are a bit chubby but have big looking shoulders and back, when they obviously don't lift a ton. Part of this is down to body type, but part is that the extra body fat can almost look like muscle with a shirt on.

Being fit is important but there are a lot of other factors that will get her going beyond just that. Never question it - just go for it. You should ALWAYS be pushing and assuming attraction. What's probably hurting you more than what you look like is the decreased confidence. I don't even have to look great to benefit from a few months/weeks in the gym - the increased energy, test and confidence will have a huge impact on how girls perceive you.

 

[zekko]

Hell no, don't wait. IMO a guy with a biggish upper body/shoulders but with a little bit of a gut can be just as powerful looking as the ultra ripped guy. Here's the thing about being extremely ripped and muscular - ripped dudes actually look pretty small unless they're wearing a tight shirt (or shirtless obv). Legit physique competitors look kinda shrimpy a lot of the time with anything other than a very well fitted shirt. A lot of this is because when they cut down enough to get competition ready, they just shrink overall.

They showed the Mike Tyson/Buster Douglass fight from 1990 on ESPN earlier in the week. I remember Tyson as being this big bruiser type but I kept thinking how small he looked in the ring. Of course, Buster Douglas was a lot taller than him. But yeah, if you have some muscle and throw a little fat on top of it your arms (or whatever) will look bigger. Not too much fat though