Openers

[Plinco]

I'm sure there's plenty of threads on this already.

direct versus indirect

Direct approach is good because it cuts right through the games that women play. It's also confident and builds a little sexual tension. Other people swear by indirect approaching. I've used both and I prefer direct.

 

[Sega Genesis]

Can you give examples you've used of direct versus indirect?

In my experience indirect creates more sexual tension than direct.

With direct everything's out in the open; no wondering, no uncertainty (both of which create tension and build on the attraction imo and experience).

With indirect there IS that wondering and uncertainty which is part of the 'game" and a big part of flirting and the fun of it.

That said there is a time and place for being sexually direct when in a relationship but upon first approach, I prefer indirect but don't mind direct as it does cut through the chase especially if I'm not interested.

$.02.

 

[Plinco]

Can you give examples you've used of direct versus indirect?

In my experience indirect creates more sexual tension than direct.

With direct everything's out in the open; no wondering, no uncertainty (both of which create tension and build on the attraction imo and experience).

With indirect there IS that wondering and uncertainty which is part of the 'game" and a big part of flirting and the fun of it.

That said there is a time and place for being sexually direct when in a relationship but upon first approach, I prefer indirect but don't mind direct as it does cut through the chase especially if I'm not interested.

$.02.

Direct
"Hey you're cute what's your name?"

Indirect
"What kind of sports do you play?"

Waiting for ioi's is submissive but several members here say that's what they do

Didn't your husband approached you directly?

 

[Sega Genesis]

I thought you were talking about being sexually direct upon first approach (Mode One). Or directly asking for her number or for a date without chatting for five minutes first.

I think approaching with "you're cute (or very pretty) what's your name? I'm Plinco" is a great way to approach depending on where you are and the moment.

Personally I dislike "gorgeous' like someone else advised. It's too player-like imo and over the top for an initial approach. JMO about that, some women eat those kinds of extreme compliments up.

Approaching with "what sports do you play?" as in your example would be awkward, there's no leading up to it!

I've been approached in all sorts of ways at various places. .

The best approach is when it doesn't even appear like an approach, like in a market or something where conversations between people often happen spontaneously and naturally.

Had a guy approach once and say "has anyone ever told you you're very pretty"?

My response "No never (haha).

We both laughed after that and began chatting.

I recall another approach where he walked up to me and said "Have we met? Judy right"?

I'd never met him and no my name is not Judy.

I wasn't impolite but it didn't inspire me to want to talk to him.

So many crazy stories...

Anyway your first example is good but after you ask her her name, give her your name. If you tell her yours, it makes it more comfortable for her to tell you hers.

The way Michael Douglas did in Fatal Attraction.

"What brings you here tonight? I'm Dan."

You could see she warmed up to him after that and said "Hello, I'm Alex."

And the rest is history!

Great flick I just watched it again recently.

P.S. Notice how he didn't tell her how pretty or gorgeous she was? Attractive women hear this all the time, it's unnecessary and can actually be a turn off in some instances

 

[Plinco]

Pre-covid, I'd have random conversations with a lot of people, some led into setting up a date with a girl. I didn't do any direct approaches back then.

 

[Plinco]

From this thread:

Please help with this club/bar situation

*To make this constructive, do not tell me not to hit on college girls. I was at a club/bar on this Thursday night and after direct cold approaching five young ladies I get approached by a bouncer telling me to leave because he said that he got a couple of complaints about me from girls, and he...

www.sosuave.net

this is cringe. Everything about it is wrong. A simple "Hi" would be much better.

Why would "hi" be better than being direct?

Bro. So long as:
A) she gave you some kind of IOI's, and

Waiting for an IOI is submissive. Why is this better than being direct?

 

[BackInTheGame78]

From this thread:

Please help with this club/bar situation

*To make this constructive, do not tell me not to hit on college girls. I was at a club/bar on this Thursday night and after direct cold approaching five young ladies I get approached by a bouncer telling me to leave because he said that he got a couple of complaints about me from girls, and he...

www.sosuave.net

Why would "hi" be better than being direct?



Waiting for an IOI is submissive. Why is this better than being direct?

Maybe so you don't get thrown out of clubs?

 

[Bingo-Player]

Indirect will be a much longer process but can usually result in stronger / deeper attraction with better quality women

Mode one is just a numbers game and process of elimination issue is once a woman knows what you want she has all the leverage

This can work if she believes you to be a valuable male but if not you're at high risk of rejection or worse manipulation

 

[Bible_Belt]

From this thread:

Please help with this club/bar situation

*To make this constructive, do not tell me not to hit on college girls. I was at a club/bar on this Thursday night and after direct cold approaching five young ladies I get approached by a bouncer telling me to leave because he said that he got a couple of complaints about me from girls, and he...

www.sosuave.net

Why would "hi" be better than being direct?



Waiting for an IOI is submissive. Why is this better than being direct?

Because she just saw you tell those other four girls in the bar that you thought they were beautiful too.

 

[Vanderdonck]

Nothing wrong with direct. I don't typically offer compliments on looks ("you're pretty") though "cute" is fine. But I have said "I saw you sitting alone and was wondering if you'd like some company." Complimenting her style/clothes/hair can work.

IOIs help but aren't required.

 

[Cheeky_James]

I'm sure there's plenty of threads on this already.

direct versus indirect

Direct approach is good because it cuts right through the games that women play. It's also confident and builds a little sexual tension. Other people swear by indirect approaching. I've used both and I prefer direct.

I never got the theory this direct game as practicised by the youtuber pickup guys etc , opening with this bland “you’re cute so I just had to come say hi “ (or whatever variant) off the bat as the reason for approach her.

it’s like.. the opposite of being suave or charming.

even a cheesy cold read is better than that.
(As long as the guy signals to her that it’s a bull**** line and just an excuse to start the convo ie with his voice and facial expression ).

Flattery is under-utilised imo.
The old saying “flattery gets you everywhere” can be quite true. But that’s not flattery .

A better approach would be “OMG, you are so unbelievably GORGEOUS I HAD to meet you. I couldn’t help myself ! My heart just started beating like crazy and I was just DRAWN to you.. its like just got sucked into a tractor beam.. haha I just powerless ! (Laughing /smirking / cheeky face )

like over the top, laid on thick, fake AF ‘wow I think Im in love’ stuff.

it’s got more energy and more balls to it imo.

 

[Plinco]

Because she just saw you tell those other four girls in the bar that you thought they were beautiful too.

No she didn't

I never got the theory this direct game as practicised by the youtuber pickup guys etc , opening with this bland “you’re cute so I just had to come say hi “ (or whatever variant) off the bat as the reason for approach her.

it’s like.. the opposite of being suave or charming.

even a cheesy cold read is better than that.
(As long as the guy signals to her that it’s a bull**** line and just an excuse to start the convo ie with his voice and facial expression ).

Flattery is under-utilised imo.
The old saying “flattery gets you everywhere” can be quite true. But that’s not flattery .

A better approach would be “OMG, you are so unbelievably GORGEOUS I HAD to meet you. I couldn’t help myself ! My heart just started beating like crazy and I was just DRAWN to you.. its like just got sucked into a tractor beam.. haha I just powerless ! (Laughing /smirking / cheeky face )

like over the top, laid on thick, fake AF ‘wow I think Im in love’ stuff.

it’s got more energy and more balls to it imo.

Being genuine is key with all of this.

 

[Cheeky_James]

Being genuine is key with all of this.

Hmmm, don’t think so.
Read what Sega Genesis wrote about going in direct ( SG is a female , apparently)

‘With direct everything's out in the open; no wondering, no uncertainty (both of which create tension and build on the attraction imo and experience).’

and ‘cute’ is pretty meh as far as a compliment goes.

You can be genuine when you get to know each other.

Pretty sure there’s heaps of infield video showing that this approach does not work. It’s cringe to watch for the most part.

 

[Plinco]

Hmmm, don’t think so.
Read what Sega Genesis wrote about going in direct ( SG is a female , apparently)

‘With direct everything's out in the open; no wondering, no uncertainty (both of which create tension and build on the attraction imo and experience).’

and ‘cute’ is pretty meh as far as a compliment goes.

You can be genuine when you get to know each other.

Pretty sure there’s heaps of infield video showing that this approach does not work. It’s cringe to watch for the most part.

That's interesting. Thanks for the suggestion.

Back when I used to date I was almost always genuine.

 

[Sega Genesis]

Hmmm, don’t think so.
Read what Sega Genesis wrote about going in direct ( SG is a female , apparently)

‘With direct everything's out in the open; no wondering, no uncertainty (both of which create tension and build on the attraction imo and experience).’

and ‘cute’ is pretty meh as far as a compliment goes.

You can be genuine when you get to know each other.

Pretty sure there’s heaps of infield video showing that this approach does not work. It’s cringe to watch for the most part.

To clarify @Cheeky_James I initially thought when @Plinco wrote direct, he meant sexually direct, Mode One. Which I personally dislike.

A low key compliment followed by asking her name and giving you yours is fine for an opener imo.

At a club for example "you're a very pretty girl what's your name? I'm Plinco."

Or again "I'm Plinco, what brings you here tonight? Leaving out the compliment altogether.

Always be genuine, it's all in the delivery anyway. Meaning, it's not what you say so much as how you say it and your vibe/energy.

 

[BaronOfHair]

Direct approach is good because it cuts right through the games that women play. It's also confident and builds a little sexual tension. Other people swear by indirect approaching. I've used both and I prefer direct.

Yeah... Slipping Ludes into the object of one's lust's Manhattan while she scrolls through Instagram on her Iphone is the ultimate indirect approach, nonetheless the fate of Dr. Hucksterable indicates:

Going THAT route is more ill-advised than The Ottoman Empire's refusal to adopt the printing press, the moment such machines hit the market en masse

 

[Plinco]

Yeah... Slipping Ludes into the object of one's lust's Manhattan while she scrolls through Instagram on her Iphone is the ultimate indirect approach, nonetheless the fate of Dr. Hucksterable indicates:

Going THAT route is more ill-advised than The Ottoman Empire's refusal to adopt the printing press, the moment such machines hit the market en masse

If I remember correctly you preferred indirect approaches, and then built sexual tension if the woman was interested in you by delving into her emotional landscape.

 

[Sega Genesis]

A low-key compliment followed by asking her name and giving you yours is fine for an opener imo.

Oops I didn't word that correctly. I meant to say asking her name and giving her yours...is fine for an opener.

 

[BaronOfHair]

If I remember correctly you preferred indirect approaches, and then built sexual tension if the woman was interested in you by delving into her emotional landscape.

Her emotional landscape is the one aspect of a gal I've ZERO desire to delve into

 

[Cheeky_James]

To clarify @Cheeky_James I initially thought when @Plinco wrote direct, he meant sexually direct, Mode One. Which I personally dislike.

A low key compliment followed by asking her name and giving you yours is fine for an opener imo.

At a club for example "you're a very pretty girl what's your name? I'm Plinco."

Or again "I'm Plinco, what brings you here tonight? Leaving out the compliment altogether.

Always be genuine, it's all in the delivery anyway. Meaning, it's not what you say so much as how you say it and your vibe/energy.

I definitely live by ‘it’s not what you say, it’s the way you say it.’

I remember one of Zan Perrions opening lines I liked
“Wow , you’re Dazzling! Who are you and why are you not my girlfriend ? “

As it has flattery + a challenge/ frame together.
A pull-push I guess.(?) I liked that one.

you’re so my type/ you’d make a great girlfriend for me is a good angle I reckon. That’s charming. And invites some role play after .

Zans early courses have some good lines and banter.