Albatross953
Master Don Juan
I should mention third date for me, I usually will take her to the rifle range if she's cool. Its actually really well received most of the time.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Excellent post, couldn't rep more, very similar to my own experiences OLD. Especially the parts about "100 emails before waste of time" "not reveal income" "circling back to ones who don't respond (no more than once though IMO)" and several other points.Espi said:here are just a few things off the top of my head. I'll probably edit this as I think of more pros and cons.
What works
Care to elaborate on how you structure your emails? Do you use the ****y/funny angle, or be genuine? Do you ask a lot of questions? I've been doing OLD for about 3 months, had some success, getting better. But I can always use some pointers from veterans haha.dasein said:Excellent post, couldn't rep more, very similar to my own experiences OLD. Especially the parts about "100 emails before waste of time" "not reveal income" "circling back to ones who don't respond (no more than once though IMO)" and several other points.
I do some things differently, but mostly similar. One important thing is to humbly assess one's strengths and then play to those strengths. Use stock techniques here and elsewhere as training wheels until you develop your own style, but in order to develop that style, you must do much repetition. I started out a miserable failure OLD, and ended up after much hard work and effort to learn the ropes over time able to send ten mails every goround to the hottest profiles in a large metro area and get 7 responses/dates. It's like any other skill or working out, learning a new language, instrument. Once you learn it and master it, it's very rewarding.
@thread: How much time would you spend to learn a skill that could get you laid within a couple of days by a hot woman whenever you want merely by logging into a match.com account while sipping a beer at home in your underwear? Would you do that for a week and then whine "it's too hard!" "it doesn't work!" "women OLD are all b-tches!" "only naturals can do OLD?" When you started working out or playing a sport, did you give up because you didn't have the end results you wanted in a week?
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Caveat, haven't done OLD seriously in four years. Busy with career/business goals and had some intervening longer relationships. Friends tell me nothing has changed though, and I may crank up OLD again in late 2014.GS750 said:Care to elaborate on how you structure you emails? Do you use the ****y/funny angle, or be genuine? Do you ask a lot of questions? I've been doing OLD for about 3 months, had some success, getting better. But I can always use some pointers from veterans haha.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
------Espi said:I use match.com and I always ask them out on the first email and in my experience usually only the most attractive ones seem to go for it. I'm specific about when and where I want to meet them, though. Your opener is very basic--which is a good thing, IMO--and I would be more specific as to the day and time and place you want to meet.
"You are attractive, and I want to meet you. Will you join me for a drink or two this Wednesday night at 8 at The Rusty Nail on 5th and Main? You're buying"