ONE YEAR FROM TODAY - I'm Getting Married

[tiburon]

brother i am sorry for carin a bit about you...

You are obiously a guy that know a bit about women, i still thing you are way to in love..which could be a bad thing . The only thing you have said that has actually backed up your argument is the fact your family and i hope this includes your mother think well of her.

I am not out of control and i do give you credit for being wise in some aspects but take some away from youfor being so impatient. About my life since you decided to take an opinion on it i have to say i didnt make a wrong choice but a great one.but thats a whole different story.

You are smart so you would realize that both cases occur . People chnage...and this is very true and when people are in love they get blinded..which is also very true. Therefore we both have good points but the funny part is that both points apply to you. She could change and you could be blinde and so could your family which is a bit harder. Now it is funny you said that about she being the greatest con artist of our times because i said something similiar once.

I aint asking you to move your wedding or anything because of my decision , but i am telling you that if you are a gambler and know some probability there is no point in betting in one thing that might bring the same profit as other which has less risk.

And about promising anything i didnt really mean it .. .it was just because .


So gambler gamble away with your life if you would....

Tiburon( who cares)

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Re: brother i am sorry for carin a bit about you...

Originally posted by tiburon
The only thing you have said that has actually backed up your argument is the fact your family and i hope this includes your mother think well of her.

My mother adores her. Still, I myself know a thing or two about women, and have had the (mis)fortune to see how things can go wrong. Having seen that, I know some of the things to watch out for, and again I didn't get into this just by wildly throwing caution to the wind -- consequences be damned. I entered into the decision after much solitary thought, thoughtful discussions with friends and family and frank discussions with her. While nothing is ever 100% certain, I'm convinced that I am making the correct choice here.

 

[ShortyBrown]

congrats to you and your sweetheart.

 

[tiburon]

yeah congrats

well i said it all..congrats ..ill see if i can marry ShortyBrown one of these days..lol..

Tiburon

 

[Bonhomme]

Congratulations!

Here's to many happy & healthy years, Gio!

 

[Dell SkyCat]

Future

*Summons all the psi-balls, electro-magnetic-field forces, powerful demons and wizards from the beyond, Speaking in forsaken tongues, sacrificing a fellow DJ as we speak, putting a doll in a circle and bringing it to life to seduce every woman out there as he takes control over Sosuave.com*

I see within my crystal ball A marriage with inevitable marriage problems ( like EVERY marriage has), tough times, happy moments, children, and a sarcastic little gio running around.

now are you sure you don't want a psychic blessing?

all in all, Congratulations.

 

[Pro]

Hey cassanova. You got any of your boys around and that know this girl, what do they say about it? That's how you can usually assess the situation fairly accurately.

Your blind, they arent.

Let me know.

 

[Cesare Cardinali]

Originally posted by: Giovanni Casanova

Okay, first of all, this is an internet discussion board. There is no privacy here. Second of all, I didn't delete "all" my old posts here, I deleted four. All of them were about her and how we started, and were things I didn't want her to know about how I felt about her (my advantage would be gone if she knew how I felt about her at that time).

Didn't she find out about your username by being on your computer and having your IM's pop up? If so, then technically, she invaded your privacy by (A) Responding to your IM's when it's YOUR computer (B) Finding out about this website by chatting with your IM buddies when it's none of her business (C) looking up this website so that she can then find out more about how you felt about her; thus forcing you to delete 4 of your posts.

If there were no privacy here, then we'd all give our real names and would advertise the fact that we post here. But there is privacy and she did violate it. Suppose she finds out your email password, does that give her the right to read and respond to your emails? And if she does, is it a "healthy" response from you to simply run around deleting the emails or the posts?

It's the same thing as my diary example, it is as if she found your diary and read it. So as "protection" you went and ripped out four pages of the diary so that she can read all she wants without reading those 4 pages. Something is off here. She should not have put you in a position where you'd have to delete the stuff. She should have said "oh, his IM's are popping up, I'd better shut them off".

Now, with respect to the biological father of the kid.

She picked him and if he is that f*cked up then I'm sure it didn't all come out in one day. Probably she knew that he was messed up and that whole bad boy thing turned her on. It must have turned her on enough to agree to have a kid with him and thus ensure that he will be a permanent fixture in her life.

I agree that people can change, so just because she made a lousy choice in an LTR partner doesn't mean she should be punished for it. However, it does seem very fast for a 23 year old girl to be with one messed up guy and be in love with him and have his kid, and then dump him and fall in love with you and then agree to marry you all in the span of a year or two. This type of rapid falling in and out of love is messed up and IMO indicates a low self esteem on her part.

Also, the fact that your prior relationship was hellish and bordering on abusive doesn't help your own objectivity here. The last chick was so bad that it could make this chick seem excessively good and could be clouding your judgement a little.

Finally, all this stuff about it being cheaper for you two to live on campus when you're married is concerning as well. Who cares if she'll get a better deal on her campus housing if she is married? This should not even be a consideration for two people getting married. In fact, given that she has a kid and is a student, I'd bet that it was her who looked into all the money saving benefits of being married so young and brought all this to your attention.

Dude, don't forget that it's always the women that end up being experts at the divorce laws long before the guy is aware of any sign of trouble. So I wouldn't be surprised if, while you were here deleting your posts, your chick was researching and getting well versed on all the financial advantages of getting married to some dude while still a student.

Gio, I think you need some perspective here. Why not go and travel a little and visit Europe and do all kinds of stuff that you will not be able to do once you get married and jump right into being a part time father? Be young and live it up, you're only 23. Why are you rushing so much? Don't you think you will regret the fact that you became a husband and a father all in the span of one year while still being in school? And all this to save a couple of bucks on campus housing! WTF?

 

[DJ de Florida]

Congrats Gio......hope it works out

 

[die4me]

congratulations man

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

I'll just touch really briefly on the whole episode surrounding her finding this site because it isn't really that important of a thing for me. After I found out she had talked to someone from this site on IM, I was a little concerned... I checked the log. Basically, it was something to the effect of someone saying "Giovanni?" to which she replied something along the lines of "I think you have the wrong screen name." This person (who will remain nameless to protect the guilty but it's someone who still posts here on a fairly regular basis) explained that I was Giovanni Casanova on this site -- she's a smart girl and she found the site. In my mind she didn't do anything bad or sneaky. And in his defense, the guy who told her about this site was a newbie and probably didn't know what he was doing. All that being said, I don't have anything to hide per se, I just didn't want her to see a couple of things, so I deleted them. Aside from those things, I didn't have a problem with her seeing what I have said or wrote because I've got nothing to be ashamed of and I'm very proud of my behavior on this site on the whole. And to her credit, she never comes on this site anyway.

Originally posted by Cesare Cardinali
Also, the fact that your prior relationship was hellish and bordering on abusive doesn't help your own objectivity here. The last chick was so bad that it could make this chick seem excessively good and could be clouding your judgement a little.

I'll grant you that my last LTR was pretty f*cked up, but that was certainly not my most recent relationship. I have dated several women since I broke up with her and have seen good and bad. Since I have seen so much bad, however, it really makes me appreciate how good she is.

Finally, all this stuff about it being cheaper for you two to live on campus when you're married is concerning as well. Who cares if she'll get a better deal on her campus housing if she is married? ... **THREE PARAGRAPHS OF RANTING ABOUT SAVING MONEY ON CAMPUS HOUSING** And all this to save a couple of bucks on campus housing! WTF?

One of my biggest pet peeves on this site is when someone takes something that I said, changes it into something completely different and then argues against the thing they transformed it into. Let's look at what I REALLY said.

Originally posted by Giovanni Casanova:
compliance with her college's policies (you are required to either live on campus, with your parents, or be married).

First of all, you'll notice if you go back to that original post that this was only one of a list of considerations above and beyond the "obvious" reasons to get married (love, show of commitment, etc.). Yet you make it out as though the only reason I'm getting married to this girl is so she can save a couple of buck on campus housing costs.

You'll also notice the curious lack of me saying anything about saving money on campus housing. That's because -- get ready for this -- I NEVER SAID THAT! Yet you went into three paragraphs about why it was a bad idea to get married to save money on campus housing. The reality: she is going to a school that says that in order to attend, you MUST live on campus in a dorm unless you are living with your parents or you are married. So one benefit of being married is that we will be able to live wherever we choose to, which is actually about 20 miles or so away from her college (which is closer to my college and where I work). This, once again, is only ONE REASON out of MANY.

 

[Giovanni Casanova]

Originally posted by Pro
Hey cassanova. You got any of your boys around and that know this girl, what do they say about it? That's how you can usually assess the situation fairly accurately.

Your blind, they arent.

Let me know.

Yes, actually, I have three pretty close guy friends whose opinions I really respect and they all really like her and are very supportive of our marriage plans. They will actually be in the wedding as groomsmen, which they would never do if they didn't like her... they'd be dragging me away.

PS... one of those three was also one of the guys telling me to ditch my ex because she was a cheating b*tch... He has no such problems with my fiance.

 

[JustDoItAlways]

Well, as I've said before, she has been cheating on you since the beginning. All the signs are there. For example, how often she talks to the ex and the kid and the fact that she picked such a loser for a boyfriend.

She has cheated, she is cheating now etc. etc.

But she does love you and she loves how you are with the kid. And that is enough reason to get married.

You stud. You go.

 

[tiburon]

lol

JustAlwaysdoit..i dont think that that its enough reason to marry...especially if she is cheating....I think is alot to say she is cheating just out of the blue , but its fairly possible, and I would be very careful. There is no love if the other person is fvcking another one..if this is true ..she loves the father of the kid..and she is using GC. Nevertheless i dont like how this woman invaded his privacy but i wont say crap because GIOVANI CASANOVA finds that this is ok..and will give me 1001 excuses for why she doing this is not a big deal etc...

Honestly i think she is exploiting the fact that GC is traumatized from a series of bad women and using this to her advantage..

"I have dated several women since I broke up with her and have seen good and bad. Since I have seen so much bad, however, it really makes me appreciate how good she is."

see what i mean..i feel bad




Tiburon

 

[dietzcoi]

Giovanni, listen to your buddy Cesare.

The rest of you, give up. If he won't listen to Cesare he is going down. He is living in AFC land. If he thinks marrying a women with serious issues and problems makes him a DJ, he has not been paying much attention here.

The boy is going down. He is hypnotized and we cannot save him.

Dietzcoi

 

[tiburon]

COMPLETELY AGREE

dietzcoi you couldnt had put it better...HE IS GOING DOWN..Hypnotized..

Tiburon

 

[assasin]

What's with all the crazy "Don't get married women are evil" crap?

You all sound like your still recovering AFC's. Women may hurt you if you don't know how their minds work, and it's true that there are unpleasant women just as there are unpleasant men.

But Giovanni is a DJ. He knows the game. He went in to this with his eyes wide open, checked the territory and got all the information he needed.

By some of the "never get married" logic on this thread I'm amazed you guys have any kind of life. Jesus, what do you do when you have to buy bread from the store? Put it off in case it goes stale?

Life is about looking at the risks and reacting accordingly to minimise those risks. If you want to cross the road, do it at the crossing, there's still no guarantee that you wont get 20 tonnes of articulated lorry in your face!

In every aspect of life you face the risk of getting hurt. Remeber all that advice we give to newbies about approaching and getting the numbers? Feel the fear and do it anyway? Tell me what the difference is!

 

[tiburon]

LOL

LOL the bread has FDA laws aproved and an expiration date..and noone is afraid but you should read more and see the bread your so called DJ is buying.

Tiburon

 

[DJ Logic]

Hey Gio

As someone who has already been married all I can say is

OH MY GOD!! WTF ARE YOU THINKING??????!

j/k - I know you are a smart dude and have probably already torn your hair out thinking this thru. But you have to admit there is a spark of wisdom in what Cesare is saying. You are young and accepting a double-dose of HUGE responsibility. If this girl is so great, she would wait for you man. There should be no rush and this is the time of your life when you should be traveling and exploring the world, unless that does not interest you in the least. I´m not going to try to convince you to change your mind because I know you are a stubborn liittle bastard.

All I can do is sincerely wish you the best of luck with this ridiculous decision you have made. Hope it pans out for you buddy!

Just remember that if/when things go wrong, your DJ family will always have your back.

OH, yeh and Congratulations...I think.

 

[assasin]

You know her? Met her have you?

Or are you concerned that she checked out this site? Sounds like rational behaviour to me. I don't discuss this site with my wife. I've nothing to hide, but if she heard I was posting on a site primarily about picking up women, I would expect her to want to get more information.

That's the sign of a stable mind. An unstable mind would have started throwing saucepans at me the moment I got home.

If your GF has access to your computer and sees things that make her question her beliefs in you, she will investigate further. That is her right. No one can make me believe that that is a negative thing.

If she went all insecure and never let the matter drop, that would be a different matter. Is there any evidence that this is the case?

Or maybe we are talking about the EX and the innocent child? Oh she must be really horrible to have a past, and a past in which she made a mistake at that! Shudder.

Get real. My wife has an ex, several in fact and she talks about them occasionally. Do you want to know why?

Because the experiences she had in the past make her the person she is today.

The woman who got pregnant all those years ago is not the same woman Giovanni is seeing now. And suggesting that she must be cheating on him is just projecting your own insecurities about you own value onto every one elses situation.

You have said nothing positive about marriage or women in this discussion that I can see, nor have you offered any evidence that you have either past experience of a similar situation or external knowledge hidden from the rest of us yet you persist in making derrogatory comments which can only have a negative effect on Giovannis self esteem.

What are we to do as DJ's? Bumble along from one night stand to one night stand? See women as a mere recepticle for the end product of our lust, and deny any kind of intrinsic value?

If you can find happiness down that road, I pity your shallow existence.