Once they've been fat they will return

[backbreaker]

The way human nature works, is that for someone to be extreme in something, it is usually overcompensating for at one point a deficiency at one point in life.

Some of the best guys with women, were motivated by the lack of sex and vowed to become the best they can, now they are great with women.

some, not all, but alot of the richest people on earth, grew up dirt poor, and the need/drive to be well off comes from the need to overcompensate for what they used to not have, financial security.

some of the best looking, 2 piece wearing size 0 pants, coke bottle shaped women, could lick the sweat off her stomach women, were at some point in time, not where they are now.

There is a woman at my gym,she's I want to say 32-33 years old.. if you could, like "create-a-woman" this is it. about the closest thing to a 10 as you will ever see. no flaw. has about an 8 pack stomach, a firm ass, my height, can't be more than 110 pounds, looks better than girls half her age, and that's no exaggeration whatsoever. Blonde, blue eyes. And you see her in the gym, like 3-4 hours a day. she's always wearing those bra shirts, showing her stomach, and there is not one ounce of fat anywhere. never see her eating anything bad, hell she takes it to the extreme. always working out, doing cardio, going to aerobics, etc.

we got to talking one day while we were both cooling down after being on the treadmill and i asked her, and told her she didn't have to answer but, but i'm just curious, did she used to be bigger? she said how did you know.. i said there is no way a normal woman who is your size, gets your work ethic from out of the blue. Guys she is ass licking hot. the type of hot you see and go home and jack off too lol.

So my point is, there is no point in making rash judgements like that, that quickly without having all the information at hand. Not saying she is defiantly going to develop that type of work ethic. She told me (this girl) she at one point was about 160, and after being rejected by a guy she liked, she startegoing to the gym, and just really took to the whole lifestyle. A LOT of bodybuilders, are guys who were at one point, just fat, and got so into the working out they took it up as a hobby. But you don't know and it's silyl to keep trying to take short cuts to NEXT women. Takes all of 10 seconds to ask for a drink of water, go look in her cabinet and see what she is eating.

 

[Rubirosa]

It's not a gender issue
Anyone who's "fat" , and then slims down though a discipline of diet and exercise has the potential to "slip".
The big problem is the sheer speed of returning fat. So hard and slow to lose, so quick to make a comeback. Quite unfair really.
However, if you feel the right to have an attractive mate, then you should make an effort in maintaining yourself...........

 

[Knight's Cross]

BB,
You've made your points, I've made mine. I will tell you in regards to your last post I stay away from "extreme" people. Extreme workout, extreme workaholic, extreme....name your area. I find you are exactly right. It's a overcompensating issue. Either they didn't get enough attention at home so they become overachievers, they were poor, so they are overworking to become wealthy, etc.
Double issue, weight control and overcompensation. Don't care for either.
KC

 

[backbreaker]

BB,
You've made your points, I've made mine. I will tell you in regards to your last post I stay away from "extreme" people. Extreme workout, extreme workaholic, extreme....name your area. I find you are exactly right. It's a overcompensating issue. Either they didn't get enough attention at home so they become overachievers, they were poor, so they are overworking to become wealthy, etc.
Double issue, weight control and overcompensation. Don't care for either.
KC

i am not *****ing as of now, we are having a healthy debate. nothing wrong with that.

I havr had some success in my time on earth, and i will be the first to tell you that yes i am overcompensating. For being the "third wheel" for attention behind my two more popular friends, for being told i wasn't as smart as some my class (though I was in all advanced classes so obviously i was considered intelligent) which is why I read as much as I do to this day. I don't think that's a bad thing at all.

What i am saying is, how is that necessarily a character flaw? because society says it is? Some of the greatest men in our history were overcompensating. George Washington had Sally Fairfax. Andrew Carnegie was pretty poor as a child and used that as motivation to make his business boom. Lincoln's dad *****d him out to everyone he could to do work and would then take the money that he made to keep for himself, and his dad would not let him go to school, he overcompensated by becoming one of the greatest presidents the united states ever had. FDR, Truman, Steve Jobs, Larry Ellison (Oracle), all were people who overcompesated.

There is a girl who i went to school with, who, no exaggeration is one of the best violinist in the country. We were in orachestra together, i was first chair 2nd violin, she was first chair 1st vilolin. I was good (seriously) but i wasn't on her level. no one was. But here is the catch. she was butt ugly. i would chainsaw my **** off before sleeping with her. Do you not think that her not getting any male attention from anyone, motivated her to become the best violinst she could possibly be? (this is here on the far right

http://www.mpnnow.com/canandaigua/x469089094&docid=kgI5IQqb3LJ8CM&w=300&h=214&ei=WVyKTob_PJSctweK5cSZAw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=443&vpy=176&dur=200&hovh=149&hovw=224&tx=53&ty=70&page=1&tbnh=149&tbnw=224&start=0&ndsp=22&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:0


My point being is that, and I'm sure rollo would tell you this in a more complex and more detailed description is that an issue doesn't necessarily mean bail, an issue is the fire that we use to either melt or mold our lives. One person might look at being "not getting enough attention at home" to using that as a reason to go get high, another might use that same issue and become a famous actor where everyone knows who they are.

I think your point of view personally is very short sighted and doesn't take into account actual human nature. More importantly, you are dismissing people who can not only be great lays, but be beneficial to your life in some way shape or form.

 

[Solomon]

I wonder how many of the fatty defenders can't get a skinny chic.

^^^

When you can't ignore their standards, best to just insult them like Solomon does.

A CHICK who is 5'4, 130 pounds is fat now?

http://www.363dseradio.com/graphics/lalapic3.jpg

http://www.freewebs.com/eternaldarknesswrestling/mickiejamesweepromopics14.bmp

Really now? Sorry Danger but I'm not buying it, this isn't about standards this thread is a bunch of KBJ's getting their jollies of on a lame thread. If the chick was 200 pounds still fine, you got a point but she lost the weight now and so she is disqualified because of her previous weight and fatness? you don't see how catty or gay that sounds? Read the original thread to yourself out loud or better yet to your alpha buddies then come back and tell me what they told ya

 

[Slickster]

This post should've been titled "Propensity for Density"


I'm sure we've all seen a fat girl get slim and then turn around and get fat again. No surprise there.

However, dumping a girl because she "used" to be fat is pretty ridiculous! Who are you Jerry Seinfeld?

After one date you have no idea if your relationship would ever get far enough that you'd have to be concerned about her getting fat again.


You need to replace your current maxim of "Once a fatty always a fatty" with "Never pass on a good thing".

She's slim and looking good now? Enjoy it!

 

[Victory Unlimited]

Once they've been fat they will return

Also, I've seen it it go the "other way" more often. I know of plenty of women who "used to be" Bomb Level Babes, but NOW...they're grossly overweight. And the reason WHY is simply because they never led any kind of fitness lifestyle in the first place.

 

[Larry Walker]

A CHICK who is 5'4, 130 pounds is fat now?

http://www.363dseradio.com/graphics/lalapic3.jpg

http://www.freewebs.com/eternaldarknesswrestling/mickiejamesweepromopics14.bmp

Really now? Sorry Danger but I'm not buying it, this isn't about standards this thread is a bunch of KBJ's getting their jollies of on a lame thread. If the chick was 200 pounds still fine, you got a point but she lost the weight now and so she is disqualified because of her previous weight and fatness? you don't see how catty or gay that sounds?

I don't believe this thread is the truth. I think the OP bombed on the date and he is trying to save his ego with this absurdity.

 

[Boilermaker]

Once they've been fat they will return is the dumbest argument I have ever heard.

KC obviously has a problem and he's too smug to face it.

Squirrels nailed it.

Cheers,

Boiler.

 

[Desdinova]

Any woman who's put in effort (without surgery) to lose weight should be commended. She realized she was a fat pig, and she did something to improve her appearance. I don't meet many women who have actually made this kind of improvement to their lives.

The ones that go back to being fat are the lazy ones. The ones who improve themselves are the ones who have the determination to be successful.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

I've got to concur with AZANON here. Women have far more rigid prerequisites for what makes an acceptable man for an LTR than men do for women. Women base their estimate of a man on his confidence, status, affluence, looks, humor, intellect, creativity, ambition, determination, decisiveness,..and the list goes on. Men's 2 requisites for intimacy? Looks and sexual availability, that's it. Beyond that. you can make a case for any esoteric quality that convinces you the girl's worth your long term investment, but if she's not hot enough to keep your physical interest, you're going to look elsewhere to make up for it.

Yet what is the single most common shaming tactic women use for men? Painting them as 'shallow' for requiring her to maintain a good shape and be sexually available.

Men have FAR too much on the line in the long term NOT to be concerned with demanding the highest standard from a woman for an investment that goes beyond anything she could hope to genuinely appreciate or match by other means.

All that said, what it really comes down to is the reason why this girl lost the weight. There are plenty of fresh divorcees frenetically working out at Planet Fitness in the hopes of reconditioning themselves enough to attract another husband - only to fatten up again once she finds the guy who "loves her for who she is". Women who once were fat, who slim down are prone to this. That's not to say there aren't women who make a definitive lifestyle change and go from being a walrus to a Fitness America Pageant contestant and parley that into modelin and a personal training career, but these are the most rare and notable exceptions.

It's really up to you to make the judgement call, but by no means should you allow accusations of superficiality influence your decision in that. As a Man, you are well within your rights to expect a maintained physique from a woman, considering the far greater sacrifices she expects from you. Would you leave her if she got fat? Damn right you would. Would she leave you if you went beta-listless-unemployed-alcoholic? Damn right she would.

 

[squirrels]

I have no idea what you are talking about in regards to your 5'4 130 lbs comment.

This thread is about standards. I absolutely agree that a woman who was fat before can easily become fat again.

Sure, a woman who was fat before can become fat again. A woman who WASN'T fat before can become fat for the FIRST time as well. Just stop exercising and start eating a lot of junk.

Sh*t, man...better not date ANY woman because if she can eat, there's a chance she could become fat!!

 

[Colossus]

It's not shallow. That's shaming 101.

Let KC have his standards.

Let me ask you guys this: how many of you here who are IN SHAPE---really in shape, not just an average guy who isnt fat---would accept or even go for a chubby?

I dont want Ms. Fitness America. I have two good buds who are dating figure competitors, and that brings a whole NEW set of neurotic annoyances (no offense intended Fug). But I also dont want a chick with 25 extra pounds, or a muffin top, or a foopa, or thunder thighs. Power to whoever likes that---not a damn thing wrong with that. Just not my flavor, not KC's flavor, and not the flavor of guys who are in great shape.

If you arent at least in good shape you have no business whatsoever having physical standards that are levels above your own body habitus. Unless you're rich, lol.

 

[5string]

Oh sh!t I'm gonna get flamed here.

A chick that is 5'4" and 130 lbs is overweight. Sorry. And I agree with some of the other guys. Once she gets fat and manages to lose it, she still has a propensity to become a fatty again. Much more so than a gal who was never fat in the first place.

I like em' petite, but that's just me.

 

[samspade]

Here's a good litmus test for those women who have been off the deep end and back.

If she explains her obesity by saying "I really let myself go - it was unhealthy and I knew it I needed to take control of my life again," then bonus points for her.

If she complains about staying in shape, blaming men, the media and other females for her having to attain some imaginary ideal, then you know she'll always have an excuse.

Rare is the woman who demonstrates even partial accountability. If you do find a woman with this mindset, put a check in the "pro" column.

 

[DMEDFISIK]

It's not shallow. That's shaming 101.

Let KC have his standards.

Let me ask you guys this: how many of you here who are IN SHAPE---really in shape, not just an average guy who isnt fat---would accept or even go for a chubby?

I dont want Ms. Fitness America. I have two good buds who are dating figure competitors, and that brings a whole NEW set of neurotic annoyances (no offense intended Fug). But I also dont want a chick with 25 extra pounds, or a muffin top, or a foopa, or thunder thighs. Power to whoever likes that---not a damn thing wrong with that. Just not my flavor, not KC's flavor, and not the flavor of guys who are in great shape.

If you arent at least in good shape you have no business whatsoever having physical standards that are levels above your own body habitus. Unless you're rich, lol.

Great points. I am fit and in shape, work out regularly, and I would NOT go for a chubby lass. I even have a problem with girls with a bit of a gut, and have even more problems when they think staying in shape is a burden with which they would rather not bother. Yes I'm shallow and not ashamed about it. Women are generally brutal about their standards, and I don't see why I should be different.

KC has valid points, but even petite girls will get out of shape eventually if they don't make serious effort to stay in shape. I would rather a former chubby girl with a committed habit of staying in shape and healthy living, to a petite one who assumes she'll be that way forever and uses this as a "justification" to do nothing.

 

[backbreaker]

Great points. I am fit and in shape, work out regularly, and I would NOT go for a chubby lass. I even have a problem with girls with a bit of a gut, and have even more problems when they think staying in shape is a burden with which they would rather not bother. Yes I'm shallow and not ashamed about it. Women are generally brutal about their standards, and I don't see why I should be different.

KC has valid points, but even petite girls will get out of shape eventually if they don't make serious effort to stay in shape. I would rather a former chubby girl with a committed habit of staying in shape and healthy living, to a petite one who assumes she'll be that way forever and uses this as a "justification" to do nothing.

exactly

first and foremost, let's visually put in persepctve what we are talking about, as far as a 5'4, 130 pound woman. here are random pictures of 5'4, 130 pound women

http://xe4.xanga.com/c9e8552638168233020504/z183847464.jpg
http://www.363dseradio.com/graphics/lalapic3.jpg
http://fs.migente.com/00f5a85d465cd5ca37ae69c4c973b9c3657eb3cc/500x500
http://www.trimspa-weight-loss.com/images/2614_c3.jpg
http://www.wrestlingepicenter.com/DivasBios/Deeb.jpg
http://images.google.com/imgres?q=5%274+130+pounds&hl=en&gbv=2&biw=1280&bih=862&tbm=isch&tbnid=3Ic4kRP_NWPDiM:&imgrefurl=http://womensprowrestling.blogspot.com/2008/03/serena-deeb.html&docid=__Asg11uVjLZLM&w=414&h=625&ei=FUyLTr73CpL1sQKA5KDEBA&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=1038&vpy=375&dur=3826&hovh=276&hovw=183&tx=150&ty=159&page=3&tbnh=159&tbnw=91&start=57&ndsp=29&ved=1t:429,r:7,s:57


for a girl who is actually going to the gym and not just going to the cardio machine, 5'4 130 isn't fat whatsoever, if she has any toneness to her at all. The girl at my gym that i posted about with the best ass i have ever seen and a flat stomach that's in college is about 5'4 125, and i would smash the living hell out of her. My mother is 5'5, 135 ish and you wouldn't call her chubby whatsoever.

Here's a good litmus test for those women who have been off the deep end and back.

If she explains her obesity by saying "I really let myself go - it was unhealthy and I knew it I needed to take control of my life again," then bonus points for her.

If she complains about staying in shape, blaming men, the media and other females for her having to attain some imaginary ideal, then you know she'll always have an excuse.

Rare is the woman who demonstrates even partial accountability. If you do

All you have t[o do is go to her kitchen adlook in her fridge. If she has truely converted to the lifestyle she will have the food of someone who is eating healthy. You walk in my kitchen right now and look in my fridge and you see bottled water, bananas, apples, some orange juice, some grape juice, some peanut butter and jelly, some eggs, some skim milk, a few other random things.

you walk in my mom's fridge and you see (she eats pretty much the same way i do, quite healthy) soy milk, apple juice, eggs, ham, water, alot of water, pineapple juice, yougert


walk into my wife's friends fridge, who keeps talking about how she is going to lose weight but doesn't, you find steaks, pops, beer, corn pops, bacon, leftover chicken and dumplings, you get the picture


it's really that simple.

A reformed cheater? Still a red flag

not necessarily. sex is not a moral issue. if a woman cheats it's because she doesn't like you, not because she's the devil.

A chick that is 5'4" and 130 lbs is overweight.

it depends on the woman if she's the type that has never seen a gym most likely yes. 5'4 130 is the hoover zone in reality, i've seen some 5'4 130 girls that were smokin, i've seen 5'4 130 girls that could stand to lose a few pounds

I've known some girls i would like to put boat loads of **** into at 5'4 130.

Let me ask you guys this: how many of you here who are IN SHAPE---really in shape, not just an average guy who isnt fat---would accept or even go for a chubby?

As stated, i spend about 15 or mor ehours a week in the gym, i could not take a girl that was not as healthy as me seriously long term, but where in this post does anyone say that she doesn't take her health seriously? hell she probably takes her health more seriously than the OP does.

It's really up to you to make the judgement call, but by no means should you allow accusations of superficiality influence your decision in that. As a Man, you are well within your rights to expect a maintained physique from a woman, considering the far greater sacrifices she expects from you. Would you leave her if she got fat? Damn right you would. Would she leave you if you went beta-listless-unemployed-alcoholic? Damn right she would.

what does one word of this have to do with the OP's point? she's not big. I'm going to assume she was attractive which is why the OP asked her out in the first place. she could have not told him about her previous weight issues and he wouldn't have been none the wiser.


this 3 page post is missing the practicality of actually watching/observing what her habits are. I do that with any girl i date or dated, within a week ic an tell if this is a woman who takes her health seriously. and if she isn't, i can still have sex and enjoy myself, not like she' s going to put on 50 pounds in 1 week or anything. B ut i know it won't ever work long term if she is not into health,l one because she will eventually put on weight and 2, she will harp on me about always going to the gym and she will keep food and crap around the house that will temp me all too often.

No one is necessarily shaming him for dumping her, we are pointing out that, as squirrels points out, his point of view really doesn't add up, because 1. the fact that she used to be 200 pounds doesn't stop you from going on 1 or 2 dates with a woman and having a good time and 2.i the were really serious about it he would have noted her actual habits.

If I like a girl one test i used to give all women is the "hey why don't you come to the gym with me, we can go get on the treadmill then go swimming aftewards".. a real natural fatty will find any excuse to not go with you. I have only dated 2 girls who actually did come with me, one being my now wife.


and to be frank, if you don't go to the gym, to the point where you can't ask her that, you really don't have a leg to stand on.

 

[Fuglydude]

Wtf backbreaker +15 hours in the gym/week?? WTF do you do in there mang?? I'll be doing 12-15 when I'm getting ready for a contest. When I'm bulking its maybe 5 hours a week, 6 at the most!

Its interesting to see the differences in opinions on this thread. I think BB's last post about looking at a girls' habits is crucial when deciding whether to consider the girl for a serious LTR. Maybe its the type of people I've been around, but Ive' seen plenty of average to fat chics get into comp shape within a year simply with focused dieting and training. We have a much greater control on your bodies, our physique and our looks than most people thing.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

I'll just leave this here,..

Before & After

 

[backbreaker]

Wtf backbreaker +15 hours in the gym/week?? WTF do you do in there mang?? I'll be doing 12-15 when I'm getting ready for a contest. When I'm bulking its maybe 5 hours a week, 6 at the most!

Its interesting to see the differences in opinions on this thread. I think BB's last post about looking at a girls' habits is crucial when deciding whether to consider the girl for a serious LTR. Maybe its the type of people I've been around, but Ive' seen plenty of average to fat chics get into comp shape within a year simply with focused dieting and training. We have a much greater control on your bodies, our physique and our looks than most people thing.

well i swim about an hour a day (i love to swim, probably my fav hobby), and i consider that gym time

this is my routine basically, an 11 day split

Day 1 Squat 5 x 8 Drop sets Front Leg Extensions 5 x 8 drop sets Hamstring Extensions 5 x 8 drop sets swim x 60 mintues mintues 45 mintues LIIT (morning) 45 mintues LIIT (night) Wind sprints HIIT

Day 2 Deadlift 8 x 10 drop sets Rows 8 x 10 drop sets Pull downs 8 x 10 drop sets Decline Situpx 8 x 15 swim x 60 mintues 45 mintues LIIT (morning) 45 mintues LIIT (night)
Day 3 Bench Press 10x 15 drop sets Military Press 10 x 15 drop sets Incline Barbell 10x 15 drop sets Iso Curles 10x 15 drop sets swim x 60 mintues Dips 8 x 10 45 mintues LIIT 45 mintues LIIT (night)


Day 4 Hamstring Extensions 5 x 8 drop sets Squat 5 x 8 drop sets Front Leg Extensions 5 x 8 drop sets swim x 60 mintues 45 mintues LIIT 45 mintues LIIT (night) 5 weighed leg raises weighted crunches 5 x 25 v-crunches 5 x 25 Day 5

rest







Day 6 Dips 8 x 10 drop sets Deadlift 8 x 10 drop sets Pull downs 8 x 10 drop sets Rows 8 x 10 drop sets Decline Situpx 8 x 15 drop sets swim x 60 mintues Wind sprints HIIT 45 mintues LIIT (night)



Day 7
rest






Day 8 Hamstring Extensions 5 x 8 drop sets Squat 5 x 8 drop sets Front Leg Extensions 5 x 8 drop sets swim x 60 mintues 45 mintues LIIT 45 mintues LIIT (night)

Day 9 Bench Press 10x 15 drop sets Military Press 10 x 15 drop sets Decline Barbell 10x 15 drop sets Dipx 8 x 10 drop sets Iso Curles 10x 15 drop sets swim x 60 mintues 45 mintues LIIT 45 mintues LIIT (night)

Day 10

Pull downs 8 x 10 d rop sets Deadlift 8 x 10 drop sets Rows 8 x 10 drop sets swim x 60 mintues 45 mintues LIIT 45 mintues LIIT (night)
Day 11
Rest


i usually do the LIIT before I do anything, and it's very very light, basically just to get a sweat going, then i workout, then i hit the pool. generally takes about 3 hours. I got to the gym this morning at 7am and got home at 10:15. Then at night i usually get on the treadmill or bike (we have one of both here at home, i get on one the misses gets on the other, we rotate) for 45 mintues right before dinner. been doing it for years.

it's somewhat overkill, but i do like a drink every now and then especially on saturdays, and i have a 3 year old son that likes taco bell and happy meals and nachos and pizza and ice cream (sparingly of course), i'd be lying if i said i didn't pick yself up a large fry and a strawberry banana smoothie (those things are good as hell) when i get him a happy meal or what not. I eat healthy i would say, between 80-85% of the time. Day 5 for me in the workout is a complete eat whatever the hell i want day, no holding back anything which acts as a refeed day, one of 2 i have (day 8 is a clean refeed). But i like having a resemblance of a 6 pack as well so i work hard.

that's what i am getting at, you lose 80 pounds, the **** is addictive. very few people who lose that much weight (like myself) are just going to go back to being a fat slob.

It's one thing, to be a 5'4 woman and be 140 pounds, and you are newly single, you get a gym membership, you are cardioing it up for 2 months, you drop 15 or so pounds by starving yourself and cardio to get in "get a man shape".

but 80 pounds? I don't think most people realize just how much weight 80 pounds is and how hard it is to lose. t habits that you have to form to lose that much weight, are just as hard to break as the habits of eating like a fat ****.

I think BB's last post about looking at a girls' habits is crucial when deciding whether to consider the girl for a serious LTR

I'm a pretty flexible guy when it comes to women, i have even forgiven past drug use, considering my own history, but this is one of 2 ironclad rules i have, the other being that she can't take any hard core drugs, even recreationally, considering my history that's not a chance i can take.

every woman will put on her "best face" so to speak when you first meet them.. but there are certain things you can watch for that even her on a subconscious level she can't hide. Ask her to go to the gym with you and see what she does. Have her cook you dinner and see what she cooks. It doesn't have to be brown rice and boiled chicken lol, but you can get a sense for how a person is by what they cook. Are they cooking pink salmon and rice and a green veggie with a salad, or are they cooking smoothered steak with mashed potatoes and gravy with home made biscuits and kool aid (damn that sounds good) Ask her what she did today 4-5 times and see if the word "gym" is mentioned at all.