"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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On the subject of hugging...

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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krd

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I agree that hugging is great. Just make sure you are comfortable doing it or you may screw it up. At this point I am still having a hard time with it, so when I do, it comes across as stiff and awkward. So my only advice would be to not even think about it, just go for it! I can't relly tell you how to get into this mindset, because I find it hard myself. But I know that this is one instance where thinking things through too much can actually be detrimental.
 

jwoz

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I agree with the previous posts that you should just do it. I guess that it ultimately depends on how the two of you have hit it off over the last few dates. It's your third, so I suppose that it hasn't gone that bad so far. I assume that you haven't kissed her goodbye yet?

If it were me, I would hug on the first greeting of the date.
 

Jester

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Yikes! HRMMmmmMMMm YIKES! just yikes!

My situation is a bit odd tho, so all i can say is YIKES!

A certain attention ***** always comments about me not giving her a hug when im leaving or before im about to go. Previously, that has brought me to give her a hug, but last time she said "hes not giving me a hug before he leaves" to some people, i said "yup". Good or bad move? Keep in mind shes an attention ***** AND she has a boyfriend but has said she likes me LOL. Its pathetic i know.

I was thinking next time i was in a similar situation with her, to walk to her with my arms open and then turn away at the last moment. Good idea or no? I'm looking to not fall into the friends zone or to be someone she just uses for attention.

[This message has been edited by Jester (edited 11-16-2001).]
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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BMX

Master Don Juan
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When I give women hugs, I do not hesitate or put much thought into it. I hug them close to me, not the gay ass-out hugs people like to give now. I bring them in close and I've had women say to me "mmmm, you give good hugs." Sometimes I do throw in a kiss if I feel like it. It's escalating on my behalf, not friendzoning on hers tbh.
 
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