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Ok....so what if you're NOT an a-sshole?

Igetit!

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What's up guys.
I don't know how many of you have seen this thread www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=157146 that was made just yesterday by Badmannaz. It basically just says for an guy to be an a-hole in order to attract women. Now true,the info in his thread is correct. I can't deny that. But the idea of just telling guys to be a-holes just to get women just urks me. Now,I'm guilty of this. I haven't done it that often,but I have done it before (in the past),and yeah,it does attract women. But it was a front. That's not who I truely am,so I was being fake....yet it did produce results.

So my question is,what if you're not an a-hole? Then what? We already know that being a "nice guy" doesn't attract women. No surprise there. But if I pretend to be an a-hole,I might get some dates/female attention,but you can only pretend to be something you're not for so long. Then once the real you emerges,the woman will see that you're not who she thought you were,then she's out the door. Nice guy. A-hole. Are these the only two options?

Ahhh no. You can attract women without being an a-hole,believe it or not. The reason guys suggest for men to be a-holes to get women is because that's the most widely known way. I think it was asked on here a few weeks ago why is it that women are attracted to a-holes,and not to nice guys. That's a loaded question guys,but let me throw in my two cents on the subject.

Alright,here's the deal: A man,a true man,who is strong,masculine,dominant,has pride and self-respect,is looked down on by society. He's not "politically correct". Society "shuns" this type of man,a REAL man. Instead of embracing these types of men,society rejects them,and has come up with it's own version of what a man should be,AKA "the nice guy".
The nice guy is "socially acceptable". This is the type of man tv talk shows,the media,and Hollywood all say that men should aspire to be,and what women should be attracted to.

Now,nobody wants to be a social outcast. No one wants to be rejected by society. That's why women repress their sexuality or hide it. For fear of being labeled a sl*t or an wh0re. Well not only do women not want to be frowned upon by society,but neither do us men. Women put up the "good girl" act to be socially accepted,and us men become the "nice guy" to be accepted as well. But that's society's version of men and women. It's not natural.
So when we approach a woman being society's version of a man(aka "the nice guy),instead of being a real one,we get rejected. Why? Because sex/sexual attraction is natural. It was here waaaaay before all this politically correct crap showed up. Sexual attraction is a natural thing,so in order to generate it in a woman,you have to be a natural man.....not this p.c. nice guy crap.

Well that explains why women aren't attracted to nice guys,but why are they attracted to A-holes? Ahhh,I'm glad you asked:
As I said before,a real man is strong,masculine,dominant,has pride and self-respect,is a protector,a provider,and takes care of himself and his own.
Now,out the "nice guy" and an "A-hole",which one appears to resemble a real,natural man the most? The nice guy,who basically bows down to women,and puts them up on a pedistal,or the a-hole/jerk,who's mean/cruel,and who demeans women? Of course the a-hole does.
If the real,true man is shunned to the point where basically the only two options a woman has to choose from are the nice guy and the a-hole,then because the a-hole is the closest to a natural man,she chooses him.

Real men are shunned by society,nice guys are accepted,and a-holes are accepted. What? Yeah,I said a-holes are socially accepted...or that is,they're more accepted than real men,but less acceptable than the nice guys. Don't believe me? Check out some of the tv shows. You'll have a show on where participants will get eliminated one by one each week. There will be one person on there who is good,who doesn't cause trouble,and who follows the rules in order to try to win the prize. Then you'll have someone who lies,cheats,screws over the other contestants,then when it comes to elimination time,and it comes down to the good person and the trouble maker,the good person gets voted sent home,while the a-hole continues on. And why? Because of ratings. Because that's what people (society) will tune in to see. That's just the way it is.

So in conclusion,yes,you can get women by being an a-hole....but that's not the only way to attract women. You can simply be a man,be what you were created to be,and attract women too.
 

Rex Man

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The real reason people here say to be an @sshole is because it is on the opposite spectrum of nice guy. It get's them out of their "comfort zone", so to speak. While their newfound game may be a little rough around the edges, they can potentially smooth it out and develop some resemblance of game.
 

Scorrere

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Rex Man said:
The real reason people here say to be an @sshole is because it is on the opposite spectrum of nice guy. It get's them out of their "comfort zone", so to speak. While their newfound game may be a little rough around the edges, they can potentially smooth it out and develop some resemblance of game.
If your end goal is to just get laid, being a jerk will work much better than being a nice guy. That's really all a lot of people on this site are looking for.

However, a DJ gets laid AND also completely changes his life and becomes something else than his former self. At least that's how I understand the difference. Being a DJ is about changing your life with one part being getting better at picking up girls but also improving every other aspect of your life.
 

cola

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Dont Don'tbe a *******, its enough of them in the world but what works for me is letting her know that she isn't going to talk to me or treat me how she pleases, and don't be afraid to next her ass with a second thought. Here is a real life example I got this chicks phone number and was truing to build some phone rapport before asking to meet her again.. so she kept talking some bs about how she's a dominant female and bla bla I payed the **** no mind until I said something and she was like shut up.. then I snapped on her and told her not to talk to me like that she then said she don't think we'd work because we are both dominant I said ok byr and hung up before she could speak.. the next day she called me trying to be buddy buddy .. so here is colas rule of thumb.. these new females are strangers so treat them accordingly pretend that she's a dude don't let her say anything you wouldn't let a dude you already know say to you and if she crosses the line next her ass.. a female knowing you will next her carrysa lot of weight
 

theunflushables

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He says be an assh0le because assh0les have confidence. Just be confident.
 

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cola

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theunflushables said:
He says be an assh0le because assh0les have confidence. Just be confident.
Actually a lot of times being a '*******' in insecurity.. Confident people can be decewnt people it more boils down to not being a pushover I would never suggest someone to be a ******* and don't try to be someone your not instead mold yourself into someone who's naturally confident and that was you won't stress yourself out. Trying to portray a fascade can be exhausting.
 

Jitterbug

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Too long, didn't read it all.

Successful men are often called arseholes just like beautiful women are often called b!tches. Just because they appear so to you on the surface doesn't mean that it's necessarily true.

The women I date all think that I'm "nice"* but also "crazy" and unorthodox. The guys who want to date them (but can't) think that I'm an arsehole due to the outrageous things I do or say to them in public. They also think that they are nice, but when I talk to them, they harbour many negative views on women that supposedly "nice" guys shouldn't have. Then of course they say that women don't like nice guys and only want jerks.

* Do understand though that no woman would call a guy she likes an arsehole in the negative sense, even if he really is; he's always "nice" to her, and if he happens to slap her around a bit, he's "misunderstood".

Forget about the labels. You're not that nice. You're not bad-a$$ enough to be an arsehole. What people try to label you mean jack sh!t. Women aren't exactly great at judging characters. Nice guys, arseholes, AFCs, DJs, PUAs etc. can all get themselves some.
 

Igetit!

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theunflushables said:
He says be an assh0le because assh0les have confidence. Just be confident.
I gotta disagree with this one man. I believe that assh0les appear to be confident. It's kind of like on the movies when someone is put in jail for the first time.....they'll pretend to be all big and bad,and may attack someone just to deceive everyone into thinking that'll they're all that,and not to mess with them.And besides,even if an assh0le really is confident,you can't tell me that out of all the hundreds of different types of people/personalities in the world,that the only one with confidence and the best one to immulate is the assh0le? You said that Badmannaz said to be an A-hole because they're confident. If confidence is the goal,you mean to tell me that he couldn't come up with a better role model to learn from?

Besides,like Cola said,trying to portray a fascade,a "fake" version of yourself can be exhausting. It'd be like whenever your girl is around you,you have to put up this front while you two are together. Then when she leaves,you can relax,and go back to you normal self. Who wants to do that? Especially in an LTR. Naw man,it'd be soooo much easier to develop real confidence/self-respect in yourself. Yeah,it might take a little while,but it'd be a WHOLE lot better than trying to pull a harvey-twoface with a girl,with one face being the real you,and the other being this "assh0le persona" just to have some chick on your own.

I can't speak for the other members here,but me personally,I DO NOT want to lose/deny myself just for a woman.
 

Badmannaz

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LMAO WOW this thread was made out of reply to mine own i see!! well all you had to do was ask!!

Ok for one....REAL MEN ARE ADOOOOOOOOOORRRREEEEDD BY SOCIETY!!!! NOT SHUNNED!!! REAL MEN ARE THE KINGS OF THIS VERY WORLD I'll name some celebs

1.Dane Cook
2.Brad Pitt
3.Denzel Washington
4.ANY 007 guy....

Now the REASON WHY *******S get so many girls is not because we are flat out ****s to the girl (at first) lol but because we are charming....a Real Man will always come off even NICER to a woman BY WHAT HE DOES TO HER!!!

any dude who disagrees i know for a fact is not getting any play right now..period
Alpha male(HIGH STATUS)=cares for No one except himself looks for no approval =confident high status man
BETA male(LOW STATUS)=insecure sidekick who looks for acceptance in what he does so is a "Nice Guy" in hopes of being APPROVED by a woman = no confidence

Woman loves Confident high status men

woman + Alpha (*******) = SEX and whatever else you want from her ;-)

I use to b an AFC when i 1st got here...left this site and went in the field for a good 3 years now i'm back trying to help some poor Schmoe change his life so a woman doesn't ever dog him again...lol

THE truth is if your Sarging after attractive women that are highly desired by other men...you have to adapt to this MINDSET or you WILL not succeed...stop trying to fall in love and just have FUN...if your not looking to be with alot of women then this does not apply to you....but if your looking to become a don juan...then read this sh!t again!!! hahaha
 

Badmannaz

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women want to play....so be a player

and l live by this philosphy and you probably should too because this is probably why your last relationship fizzled and died...and don't forget it!!

now if you dont wanna be an ass then just believe....
that if you...
Treat her like a Dog then she'll BEG for a Treat
Treat her like a QUEEN and she'll treat you like a Servant...

dont believe me? well think of everytime you treated a girl like a queen and looked up to her? yea that's right she walked over you!!!

TAKE THE NATURAL ROLE OF A MAN ( MAN OVER WOMAN) and she will play hers...(I AM UNDER HIM) adopt this philosophy and you'll just naturally start to pull more chicks....it's all about your state of MIND...im actually a very nice guy myself...but...i can be a huge *******!!! and they like it!!
 

Igetit!

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Badmannaz said:
LMAO WOW this thread was made out of reply to mine own i see!! well all you had to do was ask!!
Yep,I made this thread just in your honor.

Badmannaz said:
Ok for one....REAL MEN ARE ADOOOOOOOOOORRRREEEEDD BY SOCIETY!!!! NOT SHUNNED!!! REAL MEN ARE THE KINGS OF THIS VERY WORLD
Ok, one this I both agree and disagree. You say that real men are adored by society? What in the world? The whole world is women/sex-crazed driven. Women (especially hot women) are held as queens in society. Everything is basically tilted in their favor. All the rules and laws where everything is supposed to be "equal" have handed them the power. Although it is men who make these laws,is men whose minds have been brainwashed by the feminist agenda.

Badmannaz said:
I'll name some celebs

1.Dane Cook
2.Brad Pitt
3.Denzel Washington
4.ANY 007 guy....
Do you mean these people themselves,or the characters they portray?

Badmannaz said:
Now the REASON WHY *******S get so many girls is not because we are flat out ****s to the girl (at first) lol but because we are charming....a Real Man will always come off even NICER to a woman BY WHAT HE DOES TO HER!!!
No arguement here. I've been there and done this too many times to know it's not true.


Badmannaz said:
Alpha male(HIGH STATUS)=cares for No one except himself looks for no approval =confident high status man
BETA male(LOW STATUS)=insecure sidekick who looks for acceptance in what he does so is a "Nice Guy" in hopes of being APPROVED by a woman = no confidence

Woman loves Confident high status men

woman + Alpha (*******) = SEX and whatever else you want from her ;-)
Agree here as well. You see, that's what I'm saying:When I hear you say the word,"assh0le",I get one impression,but when you break it down into the components,the traits and behaviors,I see all the characteristics of what a man/don juan should be. Maybe it's just the word "assh0le" that throws me off.

Badmannaz said:
I use to b an AFC when i 1st got here...left this site and went in the field for a good 3 years now i'm back trying to help some poor Schmoe change his life so a woman doesn't ever dog him again...lol
Same here. I was afc to the max,times 10. Got walked over by women more times than I could count. I bought this one book called,"How to succeed with women",and that one book turned everything around for me. The reactions from women were completely different from anything I had ever had before. My confident shot through the roof,maybe too high for my own good.
I was more successful with women,but I didn't consider myself an assh0le.
 

Lexington

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You don't have to be an a-hole, you just have to take up the good qualities of an a-hole

A-holes aren't afraid to be men. They're not afraid to be sexual with women. They're not afraid to approach because if they get rejected, they don't give a flying fvck. They're also not needy. They let girls know they're interested and they allow them to take it or leave it.

On the other hand, most nice guys are terrified about women. They care so much about placating the women and they put her up on a pedestal, demonstrating to her that they consider themselves unworthy of her. They are afraid to be sexual with women so they end up being a girlfriend with a penis.

So basically, don't be afraid to be sexual with women. Be up front in showing your interest. Get after what you want like a man. Always take the lead and make the first move and escalate. Let them take it or leave it. If they don't like you, realize that there are plenty of fish in the sea.
 

Igetit!

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Lexington said:
You don't have to be an a-hole, you just have to take up the good qualities of an a-hole

A-holes aren't afraid to be men. They're not afraid to be sexual with women. They're not afraid to approach because if they get rejected, they don't give a flying fvck. They're also not needy. They let girls know they're interested and they allow them to take it or leave it.

On the other hand, most nice guys are terrified about women. They care so much about placating the women and they put her up on a pedestal, demonstrating to her that they consider themselves unworthy of her. They are afraid to be sexual with women so they end up being a girlfriend with a penis.

So basically, don't be afraid to be sexual with women. Be up front in showing your interest. Get after what you want like a man. Always take the lead and make the first move and escalate. Let them take it or leave it. If they don't like you, realize that there are plenty of fish in the sea.
Hey Lexington,I completely 100% agree with everything you just said here. But all these qualities and traits you just mentioned seems like the characteristics of a don juan. It's all the things I've learned and been taught here on the forum. These should be in the mind and heart of ALL men period.
It's like I said before,I think it's just the word "assh0le" that gets me off track,because when I hear words or phrases like confidence,self-respect,not putting women on a pedistal,not being afraid of rejection,not being afraid to show your sexual interest in a girl,and other such things,the word "assh0le" doesn't come to my mind. The phrase "real man" does.
 

Lexington

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Igetit! said:
Hey Lexington,I completely 100% agree with everything you just said here. But all these qualities and traits you just mentioned seems like the characteristics of a don juan. It's all the things I've learned and been taught here on the forum. These should be in the mind and heart of ALL men period.
It's like I said before,I think it's just the word "assh0le" that gets me off track,because when I hear words or phrases like confidence,self-respect,not putting women on a pedistal,not being afraid of rejection,not being afraid to show your sexual interest in a girl,and other such things,the word "assh0le" doesn't come to my mind. The phrase "real man" does.
Unfortunately, a-holes tend to have more manly than most nice guys. I learned this hard way. I had my broken many a time watching complete pricks getting with the girls I wanted. That's when I decided that enough is enough and that I had to do something to change my ways. Clearly the old ways weren't working.
 

Dannyrt34

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Hmm, I believe that being yourself is the best way. Seriously, if you're not being yourself, you're being fake. And unless you only want a one-night-stand, you can only put on this 'fake' persona for so long until your true colors begin to show.

So how do you be yourself and still get the girl? Learn to love who you really are and be confident with how you really are. Did you ever not say something flirty/sexual to a girl because you were afraid of offending her? Well guess what, if you thought it, that's who you are, say these things with confidence.

Even when it comes to being nice. I treat my dates like gold, haha. But I do it with confidence, and because that's just how I am. I WANT to be nice, I don't do it because I think the girl will like me more or anything.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with being nice, especially if that's just how you are. Learn to be confident with it. As long as you're not being nice only to impress women, then embrace it.
 

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