Noticing a Paradigm Shift here on SoSuave

[SELF-MASTERY]

I guess I'm just of all these guys posting about how much they suck, don't have, how ugly they are, how their mom is helping them with their game--- all that shyt...

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

I thought of this when I closed the site-- I already had all of the social skills that I needed to become successful with women, and I'm having a hard time thinking of what I've actually learned from reading and posting here. I think that most (NORMAL) guys already have what it takes to date/ FK attractive women.

 

[ATribeCalledDS]

The most important thing is not to get so caught in all this self-help shyt to the point that you don't work on your 'game.' I'm all for people working on their insecurities and trouble area in their life, but don't forget that you become good at this game through experience. You have to cover all bases; not just inner game.

CONFIDENCE THROUGH ACTION


--- MIND WORK WITHOUT FIELD WORK IS BULL----!

Wait, it's a game?

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

GAME= FIGURATIVE LANGUAGE

and here's a nice little wik link on literal and figurative language

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Literal_and_figurative_language

 

[Deep Dish]

The paradigm shifted years ago. It shifted before I ever arrived here in mid-2002. The forum has stayed the same except for the cycle of different usernames and different "PUA" trends. When I got here, Ross Jeffries was in, now out of style, and now it's "Mystery" and who else. The fact that the focus on self-improvement has stayed consistent over the years tells much about its validity, whereas the trendish PUA trends speaks of its flimsy reliability.

 

[Holland]

You have to know how to create the emotion of attraction within a woman.
If you can't do that you can me the most succesfull guy in the world but you won't get women through basic attraction (they might go for you for your money, status or social proof but that's not the way to go).

Improving yourself is great for building your confidence and I encourage anyone to do so but you have to be able to go through the mating sequence. There are many ways to go through it but it comes down to the same basic principles. You'll get it by first finding the right education and then doing that and try it over and over untill you start getting better and better at it. The progress will be probably in a J-curve, just like learning any skill.

"I hear, and I forget.
I see, and I remember.
I do, and I understand.
And not one moment before."

 

[NYC Dude]

I don't know about anyone else, but when I said "fvck being a pua, I just want to enjoy life" I finally started seeing results in my life both in terms of having a good time and getting girls. Techniques and such are good to know once you've got everything else in check, but they're definately not what most people need to concentrate on first.

 

[SELF-MASTERY]

I don't know about anyone else, but when I said "fvck being a pua, I just want to enjoy life" I finally started seeing results in my life both in terms of having a good time and getting girls. Techniques and such are good to know once you've got everything else in check, but they're definately not what most people need to concentrate on first.

From the first time I read that PUA garbage on fastseduction and on the google group I knew it was lame, and blocked that shyt out of my mind.

 

[DJ_in_making]

i'm about to self-improve my foot up y'alls ass. :kick:

 

[A-Unit]

Re:

You can't want for someone, if they don't want for themselves more.

Some guys don't want to better, they want things to be easier.

It's the nature of life, not just socializing, picking up women, etc.

Reality that exists, exists with anomalies as well as majorities. There will be a "few" who asceed and many who don't.

-----------------

Why be sad? Why care? A person has to want more for themselves than you can want for them, even if you know the potential is there.

It is they who will have to face their maker, or realize their life was spent worrying.

Emotions don't exist in the present, they exist in the past or future, when action has occurred or yet to occur. They worry about things done or not yet done. It's wasteful, and it's a trap of the 'mind'.

I'd add to the list of books awakening those that seek "The Way of the Peaceful Warrior." It's tag line is "A Book That Changes Lives," and it does through a very enjoyable story.

------------------------

Perhaps what you've noticed as a paradigm shift is an "enlightening" in the consciousness of man. Perhaps we are at terminal velocity, or critical mass, and all the self-help stuff, all the enlightenment material, all the New Age media, is about to help burst through mankind's plight into a new reality where humanity takes back their grace.

Or, maybe not?

Whatever occurs, you still exist, in your own state, as the only caretaker of that state, regardless of the "fish bowl" around you. Care for you own "fish health," and all will take care of itself.

------------------------

A-Unit

 

[PowertripII]

I've been on this board since 2001-2002 and I've always though the PUA crap was just that. Hell, before I even knew anything about this board I could've probably left most of them in the dust just sitting in the dark corner of the bar and quietly sipping my drink. It's been my staple for nearly a decade.

I came here to have a greater understanding of women and how to take control of my relationships with them (which previously were hit or miss). Picking them up is probably the easiest part of the equation and does not/should not involve a three-ring circus mentality.

C.

 

[KarmaSutra]

The paradigm shifted years ago. It shifted before I ever arrived here in mid-2002. The forum has stayed the same except for the cycle of different usernames and different "PUA" trends. When I got here, Ross Jeffries was in, now out of style, and now it's "Mystery" and who else. The fact that the focus on self-improvement has stayed consistent over the years tells much about its validity, whereas the trendish PUA trends speaks of its flimsy reliability.

That's fvcking poetry brother . . .

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

This of course will sound really odd coming from me, considering my bent for self-improvement and killing the inner AFC, but I cannot discount PUA techniques wholesale. PUA skills are tools - tools that should progress from a better understanding of oneself and the 'game' at large, but still useful when used appropriately. And there's the rub, using them appropriately and with maturity. I use what would be modified PUA techniques (which are really little more than subtle psychological manipulations) with women at work, female aquaintances, the girl at the checkout in the liquor store, my mother, my daughter and even my wife. The fact that Mystery, Style and a whole slew of other self-styled PUAs have turned what really amounts to behavioral prompts doesn't take away their usefulness, but learning these 'acts' or behaviors with rote memorization without regards to their long term consequence is where the danger lies.

It's putting the cart before the horse, PUA skills DO work and very well, but once a guy has played the part and gamed the girl he goes back to his AFC mindset and gets wrapped up in a situation he wanted so desperately, but now finds that it's more than he can handle or the girl simply bails on him once the jig is up and he reveals his form of 'bait & switch' - he's not the Man he sold her on.

Conversley the guy on the self-improvement path who sees and subdues his AFC nature, will get absolutely no where in his personal life if he lacks the tools that encourage him to go out and initiate. These are the keyboard jockeys who love to discuss the intricacies and psychological necessities of how the game is played - all while expressing how important it is to kill your inner AFC - but never enter the field to risk rejection. The PUA has the balls to initiate and crash & burn if it gives him a better advantage the next time around, but lacks the LTR and personal integrity to maintain his successes; while the meek DJ who's controlled his emotions, killed his AFC and has the mentality to put himself as the PRIZE, yet is hindered by his lack of PUA game fails in the short term.

PUA skills are as necessary as is a DJ mentality - it's balancing the two that's the art.

 

[TheTrader]

there is no such thing as a man who is not able to approach. to be a man means having the drive and desire to get in contact with new people, mainly women.

 

[Skel]

I like it. I feel now that we have been duped by these PUA's and their silly tactics. It is not that people havent tried to apply them. Its that deep down inside, every guy knows that the PUA philosphy does not work and is not natural.

I do not agree with this. Its not natural because you have never done it. Was driving a standard stick shift car natural when you tried it? It becomes natural as you drive it more and more often. PUA philsophy does work and if its not working for you then its because you lack the self confidence to pullit off. 2 cents out.

 

[Bonhomme]

This site is evolving, just as anything else does.

Women catch onto a lot of the tricks and gambits. Others that stand the test of time are really just applied psychology.

I've found that complicating things too much has been counterproductive. Looking back on things, there were only a few adjustments that really mattered. Ther rest was already there in spades. Probably the same for a lot of other guys.

 

[sstype]

Thanks for the responses guys...the general consensus remains that self-improvement is important if one wants to gain success with women.

If used correctly, PUA beliefs and tactics can also be another form of self-improvement. But we cannot expect it to be reliable all the time.

Having a strong masculine identity is 80% of your "game"

As Gunwitch mentioned in one of his posts, womens attraction towards masculinity(in different forms), is irrefutable and thus our energies should be focused on increasing our masculinity. The PUA stuff is great for fine tuning ourselves in different situations

 

[Jvesti]

The pua stuff is generally a bunch of snake oil. I've known plenty in the PUA community that are all about that stuff we'll call them "puaists" they are for the most part tools who can't get laid and creep girls out. Even that dork yes he's a dork "style" admited that 98% of them are dorky computer nerd virgins. The other 2% in my estimation are the ones who take advantage or them or the ones who are natural game and dont realize that their pua tactics are meaningless. To illustrate my point and their stupid delusioned bull****. Most of them are socially inept and just dont get the real world and reality. Generally their friend circle is only on asf. I distinctly remember a conversation with one that went as this:

Him: ya man, i went up to a group of 9's and was doing mystery method they totally gave me tons of IOI. See it totally works, your game is foolsmate
me: oh well that's nice I had sex with a girl....muliple times

The point of interacting with girls is to get them. Hence the reason we have sex drives. They think its such a big deal when a girl smiles at them or gives them one of their stupid IOI. But they are so disillusioned from reality they can';t see that its all worthless.

Sexual Energy is what attracts women, share masculine sexuality. Charisma is merely transmuted sexual energy to other means. Successful salesmen a lot of them can't explain what they do. In all actuality they are transmuting their sexual energy in other ways. Same for most successful guys with women. Because its VERY difficult to explain transmitting a certain emotion. I take a crack at it in "T Theory: The introduction to natural game" which is in the DJ bible. But its very difficult to explain, eventually as you get more out in the world you build your confidence and yourself you just "get it". When you get it things just come out naturally, your emotions almost carry what you say and how you act without you struggling much.

 

[Bvbidd]

The pua stuff is generally a bunch of snake oil. I've known plenty in the PUA community that are all about that stuff we'll call them "puaists" they are for the most part tools who can't get laid and creep girls out. Even that dork yes he's a dork "style" admited that 98% of them are dorky computer nerd virgins. The other 2% in my estimation are the ones who take advantage or them or the ones who are natural game and dont realize that their pua tactics are meaningless. To illustrate my point and their stupid delusioned bull****. Most of them are socially inept and just dont get the real world and reality. Generally their friend circle is only on asf. I distinctly remember a conversation with one that went as this:

Him: ya man, i went up to a group of 9's and was doing mystery method they totally gave me tons of IOI. See it totally works, your game is foolsmate
me: oh well that's nice I had sex with a girl....muliple times

The point of interacting with girls is to get them. Hence the reason we have sex drives. They think its such a big deal when a girl smiles at them or gives them one of their stupid IOI. But they are so disillusioned from reality they can';t see that its all worthless.

Sexual Energy is what attracts women, share masculine sexuality. Charisma is merely transmuted sexual energy to other means. Successful salesmen a lot of them can't explain what they do. In all actuality they are transmuting their sexual energy in other ways. Same for most successful guys with women. Because its VERY difficult to explain transmitting a certain emotion. I take a crack at it in "T Theory: The introduction to natural game" which is in the DJ bible. But its very difficult to explain, eventually as you get more out in the world you build your confidence and yourself you just "get it". When you get it things just come out naturally, your emotions almost carry what you say and how you act without you struggling much.

QFT - That post is %100 truth and probally one of the best posts I have seen on here (better than pook and any other guru) and what I try to tell you.

 

[manbearpig]

Sexual Energy is what attracts women, share masculine sexuality. Charisma is merely transmuted sexual energy to other means. Successful salesmen a lot of them can't explain what they do. In all actuality they are transmuting their sexual energy in other ways. Same for most successful guys with women. Because its VERY difficult to explain transmitting a certain emotion. I take a crack at it in "T Theory: The introduction to natural game" which is in the DJ bible. But its very difficult to explain, eventually as you get more out in the world you build your confidence and yourself you just "get it". When you get it things just come out naturally, your emotions almost carry what you say and how you act without you struggling much.

I'll check out that T theory article. Sounds interesting.