"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

not providing value for others

Plinco

Plinco

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2008
Messages
3,096
Reaction score
1,951
Age
42
Location
Florida
Do anyone here have interests that are not valuable to anyone else?

I figured out that one of my main problems is that I do not provide enough value to other people, nor do I have the desire to.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

F

FairShake

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 8, 2008
Messages
2,405
Reaction score
306
What kind of interests do you think provide value to other people? Like computer or home repair? Or drinking alot and being funny?

The only interest you need for other people to like you is an interest in THEM.
 
Plinco

Plinco

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 29, 2008
Messages
3,096
Reaction score
1,951
Age
42
Location
Florida
the only things I am good at are landscaping, and customer service. I know that the economy is going to completely crash, and I know about this site; you would think I should be getting ready to be way ahead of other people, but it is like I do not have the desire to make a practical application of my foreknowledge.

People are attracted to value, but in a seriously bad economic crisis, landscaping and probably customer service is not going to cut it. I would like to think I could be a crisis manager or leader of some kind, but again, I do not know how to make a practical use of the situation.
 
I

Iceberg

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 19, 2002
Messages
3,110
Reaction score
136
Age
45
Location
Manhattan, NY
Not quite sure what you're talking about, but "providing value" to people goes FAR beyond what you do for a living.
 
F

FairShake

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 8, 2008
Messages
2,405
Reaction score
306
Plinco said:
the only things I am good at are landscaping, and customer service. I know that the economy is going to completely crash, and I know about this site; you would think I should be getting ready to be way ahead of other people, but it is like I do not have the desire to make a practical application of my foreknowledge.

People are attracted to value, but in a seriously bad economic crisis, landscaping and probably customer service is not going to cut it. I would like to think I could be a crisis manager or leader of some kind, but again, I do not know how to make a practical use of the situation.
Click to expand...
If you're talking about careers, health care is always a sure bet. But customer service is too. I don't know how bad the crash will be, but I don't think it will be apocolyptic so people will still buy and sell as always.

If you're talking social value, well, your interests are pretty literal and specific to you. People don't need alot in common but they need a couple things. And your interests aren't wide enough that alot of people will share them.

But there are other things that provide value besides interests. Being a good friend, listening, humor, a sense of fun. Connections between other people. Access to fun things. You can still have your own private interests but still be a socially valued person if you work it right.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top