"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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No kiss on second “date” - I think this is a lost cause.

MoreThanSmooth

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No kiss on second date - I feel like I’ve completely blown it.
To be honest, I don’t even think these two meetings we’ve had have been actual dates.

First time round I invited her out for dinner. After, she suggested we go get drinks. Date started at 7:30pm and ended at 2:30am - no kiss.

Today, we went for a picnic in the mountains. I still didn’t have guts to go for a kiss. I didn’t feel there was a moment and I’m incredibly anxious around her.

I did make moves in the touching department. I laid my hand on hers, I got closer to her. I know it’s raher pathetic, but I’m shy and I’m not in the game.

So I feel like I’ve completely blown it with her.

She’s either 1) Not actually interested and hasn’t been since; 2) really confused about the whole thing; 3) going to move on.

The only “good signs” from the date were: her not flinching or moving when I did touch her. And she says she’ll drive to come see me and we’ll do something.
This literally sounds like you're doing absolutely fine, but you're just building it into a disaster in your head and getting anxious.

Take a chill pill and just enjoy being on the next date with her. When she's looking particularly comfy, lean in for a kiss. It's no big deal. If she wants a third date and was holding your hand then that's good. It's not always about getting a kiss, just like it's not always about having sex.

I did make moves in the touching department. I laid my hand on hers, I got closer to her. I know it’s raher pathetic, but I’m shy and I’m not in the game.
The only "pathetic" thing here is that you're judging yourself as pathetic. Stop kicking yourself in the balls, that's step one for not f*cking up. The more you're hating on yourself in your head, the less confident you're going to be and the more you'll f*ck things up next time.

You should be thinking "Held hands, that was pretty awesome. Date next week, I'll get the kiss this time." NOT "Oh my god I'm pathetic".

Also if you can't bring yourself to do the lip kiss straight up, go for a forehead kiss. Or, if you're REALLY shy, a cheek kiss. It'll normally naturally follow up into a proper kiss and she'll lean in.

I'll be honest - if she's even going on 3 dates with you, you're doing very well. I can't remember the last time I got to the second date, normally if I don't kiss a girl on the first date she gets p*ssy and nexts me, I think it's because I keep dating radical feminists >_>
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Igetit!

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So we’ve spoken to eachother today. She wants to come over to see the work I’ve done on this place I’ve moved to. I guess you can call it the 3rd date - I will take her bowling as well.

She’s asked if I’m free this week, but I’m not because of the work I’ve got to do. So I will suggest she comes this weekend.
Ok...... Well you said you thought this was a "lost cause" cause a kiss failed to happen on the 2ND date. Apparently,it's not lost yet,cause she's still expressed interest in still seeing you.

So...........given all the advice you've gotten up til now...when this "3rd date" takes place,what do YOU PLAN to do?
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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No kiss on second date - I feel like I’ve completely blown it.
To be honest, I don’t even think these two meetings we’ve had have been actual dates.

First time round I invited her out for dinner. After, she suggested we go get drinks. Date started at 7:30pm and ended at 2:30am - no kiss.

Today, we went for a picnic in the mountains. I still didn’t have guts to go for a kiss. I didn’t feel there was a moment and I’m incredibly anxious around her.

I did make moves in the touching department. I laid my hand on hers, I got closer to her. I know it’s raher pathetic, but I’m shy and I’m not in the game.

So I feel like I’ve completely blown it with her.

She’s either 1) Not actually interested and hasn’t been since; 2) really confused about the whole thing; 3) going to move on.

The only “good signs” from the date were: her not flinching or moving when I did touch her. And she says she’ll drive to come see me and we’ll do something.
#nextset
 

marmel75

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Ok...... Well you said you thought this was a "lost cause" cause a kiss failed to happen on the 2ND date. Apparently,it's not lost yet,cause she's still expressed interest in still seeing you.

So...........given all the advice you've gotten up til now...when this "3rd date" takes place,what do YOU PLAN to do?
I mean honestly when a basic kiss is such a big deal does it really matter? If he can't even bring himself to try and kiss a woman after being together for over 10 hours how will he seduce her?
 

Atom Smasher

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Perhaps he's on the beginning of the path to learning.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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