so i was just talking to this girl, and she was talking about how nice i treated her (shes been having problems lately) now is taht a bad thing? (thinkin it is) and so how do i get out of that? i want to treat her nice because i really like her and think she deserves to be treated nice, but i dont want to be put in that "friends" category... whats some stuff i could do? any help?
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
"niceguy" problems
- Thread starter lucky13
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Docs
Banned
Yeah...that's bad.
Have you flirted at all with her....ever? If not, you damn well better start.
(It'll take time for her to come around...if it even has a chance in hell of happening)
Have you flirted at all with her....ever? If not, you damn well better start.
(It'll take time for her to come around...if it even has a chance in hell of happening)
sparky0000
Banned
- Joined
- Apr 27, 2006
- Messages
- 669
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i think you are doomed. every single girl that i desire seems to want me badly. i don't have to worry about whether she desires me or not. it is pretty obvious from very early on. i feel that if she doesn't act entirely interested, she must not really want you.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
whatever you do, don't become her emotional tampon. I'm in that situation right now. It sucks. If she asks you about emotional issues she's having (especially about other dudes) please don't talk to her about it. I made that mistake. I had such a case of one-itis and AFC i thought it was the only way to get close to this girl... what do i have to show for it now??? a girl that asks me about her guy problems. Good luck brotha.