Need your opinion

[ink_wizard]

Ok so just in case you don’t know about my situation from my last post, I’ll briefly sum it up....I’ve been seeing this chick for nearly a couple of months. Have been on 4 dates in that time. We get on really well, lots of chemistry, and we slept together the other night which was amazing and we both enjoyed ourselves and she told me she did too. She’s been throwing all signs of high interest throughout the whole 2 months, always the first to message and set up dates with me, enthusiastic when she hears from me and has told me she that she enjoys my company and seeing me every time we see each other. The dilemma? Because of her “busy” schedule I’m lucky to see her every 2 weeks. We’ve never met up once or twice a week because she is always busy with work and her also wanting to spend time with friends on her time off as well, but when we do set up dates she’s never flaked and we do end up having a good time.

my other dilemma is even though lately she has responded to my texts promptly she sometimes will ignore them for a couple of hours as I’ve seen her online multiple times but she hasn’t opened my messages.....I kind of get the feeling that I’m second fiddle and not that big of a priority to her but yet when we are together she is all over me? She has told me she isn’t seeing anyone else and doesn’t have the time to “date ” multiple people but I don’t really understand the long wait times between dates and the often times of her ignoring or delaying text responses.
I really do like her, she’s probably been one of the better girls I’ve dated in the last year and want to continue seeing her but don’t know if I should just keep her as fwb and withdraw my attention from her and just let her come to me or just keep playing it cool and see how it goes? I do have other plates which are going fine but I really like this one lol. Also after having secks on the weekend and speaking to her yesterday to try and set up another date she seemed a bit unsure on when she’d be available next but said she would let me know and that it would definitely be “soon”.......

yeah don’t know what to think.....any opinions ?

 

[Paper Crane]

It could be that you're just more anxious than her.. and that she might just be more confident than you. I think the idea that a girl can be more confident than a man scares a lot of men. Or, another alternative might be that she is using you as a rebound and doesn't really like you as much as you like her. Either way don't sweat it. You're supposed to enjoy women not be anxious about them.

 

[Focal core]

A ground rules. A women thats into you will be never too busy for you.. Could be a rebound but youre her time killer for sure.. Youre her placeholder at the moment until she found someone that she really want. Call it FWB, Plates, she treated you the same.

Word of advised, never asked a women if she enjoy the time with you.. She should be the one who bring that up.

 

[Black Widow Void]

Been there and yeah, it's a jolt.

This is going to boil down to what is more important to you.

If you feel that her actions are contradicting her words... and you find a way to call her out, you'll feel good and it might seem like a temp victory. .. .but this is the short term achievement. After the "ah ha" wears off, you'll discover that you've cut all your options with her. If you allow some wiggle-room, you'll have a potential plate. Although you've demoted her, she can still serve a purpose.

If you can lower your expectations/ view of this gal, you can keep her as an option. And if you see her actions (not words) demonstrate better behavior, you can 'promote' her to something better (if she's earned it and you deem her worthy).

Personally, I've been too quick to dismiss certain women. In retrospect, I should have played it more cool and at least could have had them as a side option. Hopefully mentioning my blunders will prevent you from making the same mistakes

 

[ink_wizard]

So do I just pull back and let her come to me if she likes me or do I continue keeping low contact with her?

 

[Focal core]

So do I just pull back and let her come to me if she likes me or do I continue keeping low contact with her?

Pull back, enjoy your time with other plates, comm on logistic/date focus on improving yourselt at the moment. When she reach out she will be all over you again for sexual release, if she wants more there will be no mountain stopping her to pursue you and reciprocate according to her interest level.. Right now its kinda low..

 

[Focal core]

Op already in with her for couple of month, its either light contact or pullback.. Neither wont be wrong.. But avoid overtly contact .. Pull back would be better as it would prompt her to decide on what feelings she have for him.. Its a double edge sword as it as well will put op out from being friendzone/orbiter status.

 

[BadBoy89]

So do I just pull back and let her come to me if she likes me or do I continue keeping low contact with her?

Spin plates.

 

[Rainman4707]

Yeah. She dosent seem that interested. So match that. If you come across to keen, she will be gone like a rat up a drainpipe.

It sucks dose'nt it. We wish everything would be so simple. Life is harsh. Casanova found that also. For one reason or another, things didnt work out long term with his women. He was left wondering why. Destiny maybe.

We wish that she would prioritise you/us. Instead of her friends. Maybe you're thinking. I really like this one, im getting hooked on her, but she dose'nt seem as keen. Unfortuatley, i think..if you clear the haze....the answer is....don't come across to keen...maybe even pull back a little...give her the gift of missing you. I have a feeling you have to be very careful here...

 

[Spaz]

Idiots do things they don't want to do and will suffer their whole life because they think it's needed or its their duty.

Men who r geniuses, learns to do whats needed joyfully, and then they start to grow because they have a limitless way at looking at life.

 

[ink_wizard]

What I don’t get though is she’s the one usually always initiating contact with me and wanting to set up dates. I barely ever initiate contact with her. In person she’s all over me and then in between dates she’s contacting me and flirting. It’s just the fact that I don’t get to see her every week because of her “busy schedule”. And also that she takes ages to respond to messages despite being online....

 

[Rainman4707]

What I don’t get though is she’s the one usually always initiating contact with me and wanting to set up dates. I barely ever initiate contact with her. In person she’s all over me and then in between dates she’s contacting me and flirting. It’s just the fact that I don’t get to see her every week because of her “busy schedule”. And also that she takes ages to respond to messages despite being online....

Nothing much you can do about being low on her priority list apart from act needy and lose her.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Seriously? A few hours? C'mon man. This is extreme needy behavior.

My opinion is you are going to start acting desperate with this woman sooner rather than later and ruin it if you don't really work on your mindset.

 

[ThisIsSparta]

What I don’t get though is she’s the one usually always initiating contact with me and wanting to set up dates. I barely ever initiate contact with her. In person she’s all over me and then in between dates she’s contacting me and flirting. It’s just the fact that I don’t get to see her every week because of her “busy schedule”. And also that she takes ages to respond to messages despite being online....

You are her plate, guess she is in a relationship/marriage. Act accordingly and enjoy the ride as long as it lasts.

 

[dude99]

Ok so just in case you don’t know about my situation from my last post, I’ll briefly sum it up....I’ve been seeing this chick for nearly a couple of months. Have been on 4 dates in that time. We get on really well, lots of chemistry, and we slept together the other night which was amazing and we both enjoyed ourselves and she told me she did too. She’s been throwing all signs of high interest throughout the whole 2 months, always the first to message and set up dates with me, enthusiastic when she hears from me and has told me she that she enjoys my company and seeing me every time we see each other. The dilemma? Because of her “busy” schedule I’m lucky to see her every 2 weeks. We’ve never met up once or twice a week because she is always busy with work and her also wanting to spend time with friends on her time off as well, but when we do set up dates she’s never flaked and we do end up having a good time.

my other dilemma is even though lately she has responded to my texts promptly she sometimes will ignore them for a couple of hours as I’ve seen her online multiple times but she hasn’t opened my messages.....I kind of get the feeling that I’m second fiddle and not that big of a priority to her but yet when we are together she is all over me? She has told me she isn’t seeing anyone else and doesn’t have the time to “date ” multiple people but I don’t really understand the long wait times between dates and the often times of her ignoring or delaying text responses.
I really do like her, she’s probably been one of the better girls I’ve dated in the last year and want to continue seeing her but don’t know if I should just keep her as fwb and withdraw my attention from her and just let her come to me or just keep playing it cool and see how it goes? I do have other plates which are going fine but I really like this one lol. Also after having secks on the weekend and speaking to her yesterday to try and set up another date she seemed a bit unsure on when she’d be available next but said she would let me know and that it would definitely be “soon”.......

yeah don’t know what to think.....any opinions ?

Sounds like to me she is She is following "the rules." It was a book released in the 80s i believe, and it taught girls how to play mind games with men to make them fall harder and faster for them.

Don't take her behaviour too seriously.

 

[dude99]

So do I just pull back and let her come to me if she likes me or do I continue keeping low contact with her?

Play it cool. Pull back your effort and let her come to you. . Any chick that gave me "soon" for an answer would immediately have me withdrawing most of my effort and i would focus on other women until she reached out. If she is interested she will notice and she will reach out. Then you know she actually likes you.