"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Need some tips on on non-alchoholic drinks in a bar/club!

MaxPayne

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Aight am a guy that does not drink at all. Whenever i go to a club or a bar i usually order a Redbull, and am telling u i have had enough already! lol

I need to find a cool non-alchoholic drink to order in a bar or club!

ohhh and if i do order it, i want it to be a MANLY drink :p

Thanks folks.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Hughman

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A manly, non-alcoholic drink?
Soda (carbonated water) and lime is sharp and refreshing.
Ginger ale, again, fiery but refreshing.
 

scrouds

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Water lol. Its cheaper too.

Do you really feel the need to fit into the bar so well that you need to carry around a mocktail? Order something you like.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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MaxPayne

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No folks trust me i don give a flying Fu*k what people would think of me if am carrying a mocktail or whatever. I just would like to know if there was any good drink that non-alchoholics recommend.

Apparently am just gonna be sticking to Redbull

Peace n Thnx
 

Duffdog

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rockstar?
 

DJDamage

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I am curious as to why would you go to a bar and order a non alcoholic drink?! why aren't you drinking?!

If I want to sober up and feel hydrated, by the end of the night I just ask for water and that's good enough to for me.
 

Cableguy

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Interesting topic as I've been going through this lately. I'm on a cut cycle and limit my adult beverages to 2 beers a night and only on Friday and Saturday nights. I hate RedBull (unless paired with Stoli) so I have been getting 7up. If I'm feeling crazy I'll get a diet Coke or plain old water with some lime squeezed in.

My game is 10 times tighter when I have a sober mind. I'm thinking of making this a permanent rule.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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King Turi

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What's the deal with Americans and diet coke?
Fuck that, just get a normal coke.
Diet coke makes you look like a poof.

I'm pretty much a non drinker, whenever I go out, I always just get coke, if I get sick of it I'll get a red bull or something to break it up.

The only beer I don't feel like instantly spitting back out is Corona, and I don't really like the taste of Vodka, though Smirnoff Premium was decent..

But yeah, just go Coke?
 

Aragon034

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King Turi said:
What's the deal with Americans and diet coke?
Fuck that, just get a normal coke.
Diet coke makes you look like a poof.

I'm pretty much a non drinker, whenever I go out, I always just get coke, if I get sick of it I'll get a red bull or something to break it up.

The only beer I don't feel like instantly spitting back out is Corona, and I don't really like the taste of Vodka, though Smirnoff Premium was decent..

But yeah, just go Coke?
there's alot of sugar in regular coke (or any soda beverage for that matter.)

Last time i had a regular coke was years ago and no one ever grills me for it. Nothing "poofy" about it.

If i don't feel like drinking too much i'll just nurse a pint for awhile. Not sure if you want to completely stop drinking or not though. I rarely if every get anything but diet coke or water other than beer and shots.
 

King Turi

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Well, I've been called a poof for not drinkin' alcohol, so it's give or take.

Diet coke still screws your teeth over though, all the same ****.

If you're workin' out, a normal coke ain't gonna do nothin' to ya weight wise, but I digress.
 

Poonani Maker

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I always drink a ton of water. Goto the bathroom at least 5 times. The barrrrtenders don't like me ordering free water, but hey, who gives a fvck. Fvck em. They serve me, not the other way around. Most places' bartenders are "o k" with me asking for water, and they always chuck it with too much ice out of spite it seems.

If I order water after ordering beer then some women think I don't like them, that I'm trying to sober up or tell those looking on that I don't want to be seen drunk with HER. People are too damn insecure and sensitive in bars. I say fvck it. If I don't go home with pvssy, then at least I'm healthier from drinkin all that water, flushing my system and pissing out the bad stuff in my bloodstream.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Evzone

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Just get a water if you don't want to drink alcohol.
 

RandallLambert

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There are really good non-alcoholic beers.

Try Koppaberg non-alcoholic pear cider. Like liquid bubblegum.
There are also non-alcohoilic beers like Fruuli which is strawberry flavoured, or apple and mango flavoured Heineken. In my opinion, you want a drink that LOOKS like it could be alcoholic, but isn't. E.g a cider drank to halfway and poured into a whisky glass can double for a scotch on the rocks.
 

#41

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I have a family history of alcoholism, so I'm very careful about drinking -- usually no more than 1 or 2 drinks. Many nights, I go out and don't drink at all. I actually enjoy being able to provide my own transportation home if needed.

As for bartenders giving you static about not ordering a "drink" -- tip like you bought a mixed drink and they won't give a fµck Bartenders hate people that don't tip; they could care less what you're drinking. That's stuff the proprietors worry about. If you're tipping, most bartenders won't charge you for a diet coke.

In less crowded bars, I'll sometimes say I'm DD'ing for my friends -- that usually gets free non-alcoholic drinks as well.
 
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