There's not much I can say that you would be ready to understand right now. You will understand everything I say on a rational level, and you will think you already know it. Then you will read it and go out and post the same stupid posts (ps all my posts are stupid so there's no problem with that). On an emotional level, you are exaggerating to the stars.
First of all, take a deep breath. You're not the first person this has ever happened to, you are not the last, you will not be the last. It probably doesn't feel like it.
"honest guys, youve all heard this before countless times, but this girl IS the love of my life"
I know it feels like it. I've been there - lots of people on this board have been there. Losing some chick that you love sucks. But you're exaggerating. Every human being is equally beautiful. There are millions of gorgeous women that are right for us, even in our country, state, province, city etc.! So this woman was one of millions who could be a love of your life. So what?!
Third and by far the most important: do you feel like you could get a chick as wonderful as her within the next year? If not, THAT IS the problem, not the loss of this one chick out of 3 billion on earth.
Use the pain, the hurt as motivation to fix your life, your emotions, and your desperation starting right now. You don't have time to wait!
Give the girl the gift, as thanks for all your great times together. She deserves it. You've had such wonderful times.
Besides, she will be responsible for your new, better life - if you're smart enough to start it. Give her the gift. She sounds like a nice kid, I'm sure she's great.
When I came to this board, everyone told me: "If she wants friendship, it's almost certainly over." And I didn't believe them. I thought my relationship was different. Everybody does. Through experience, I learned better.
Since you certainly do not believe me (as nobody in your shoes does), I encourage you to try with every means you have to win her back. You probably won't, but at least you'll know you tried. Right?
Experience teaches better than anything I can do or say.
One last thing. Some people say that time heals all wounds. I don't believe this at all. Time buries all wounds. If you want to *heal* wounds, you have to use a different tack.