You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
A combination of Chad having much more choice and Normie needing to hang on for dear life - and willing to defend it - could make Chads think twice about whom exactly they tap. I liken it to the way the honey badger fights off lions.A must watch. So is Unfaithful. It checks off all the boxes.
Beta provider slayed Chad who was screwing his wife in the end.
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Unfaithful (2002 film) - Wikipedia
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May check it out. Any movies 5/5?
One of my favourites is Shawshank Redemption. Nothing to do with women but still a great movie.
Right up there with the Raphael scene from "Whatever":Last American Virgin.
It's OVER for VacuumCels.Indeed, a gamble is a good comparison. For the guys that play poker (especially poker tournaments), you can make all the right moves and right decisions, but a lot of times you'll still lose because you either got unlucky or the other person makes irrational decisions and they somehow got lucky and beat you.
Same with relationships, you can make all the right moves, but if your partner makes irrational decisions, it ultimately won't work out.
That's because we don't live in a vacuum, the actions of others directly impact our lives.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
RG is an avowed Feminist. Ain't surprising that he signed onto a role like this, rather than recoiling in disgustI saw a few posters talk about this movie recently on SS. Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams are both good actors, so I watched it last night.
My thoughts and review:
The movie is quite good and was up for many awards. Both Gosling and Williams were also nominated multiple times. I won't go into the plot in details, you can read about it or watch the movie. The writers were quite accurate, IMO, about what happens in most marriages and LTRs. They wrote from experience, is my guess.
Some notes:
- I thought Gosling was superb. Was never a huge fan of him, but this movie changed my opinion. I can't help but think at some point he's seen the original Rocky movie (Academy Award for Best Picture 1977), and imitated or channeled Stallone's character, Rocky Balboa. Sans the boxing part, the mannerisms, thinking, speech, attitude, wit, many features of the characters are very similar.
- Williams was very good too. The part that really stuck with me was how appalled and disgusted she was when Dean (Gosling) was trying to make love to her on the floor of the hotel. She gritted her teeth like she just could stand it even though he was trying to be spontaneous and romantic. She just didn’t even want him to touch her. Sinking feeling as he was still very in love with her.
- Gosling is depicted for the most part as the White Knight, marrying Cindy (Williams) after she gets knocked up by another guy. Dean isn’t a p*ussy per se, and he appears to be a really good dad and husband, keeping things light by acting goofy and showing affection to Frankie (kid) and Cindy. BUT, as has been discussed HEAVILY on SS for decades now, he is largely unmotivated with few aspirations. This plus his drinking proves to be his undoing with Cindy. She likely wanted better for her and her daughter. She was a nurse and was likely tired of towing the line the past 5 years.
- There is a part in the movie where Dean is talking to a co-worker. He comments that women are always pursuing “Prince Charming” (Alpha/IDGAF Guy) but always settle for the stable guy with the good job (Beta Male Provider). VERY TRUE.
- The ending is sad, but accurate. I felt really bad for Dean because he was offering his love and support the best he knew how; trying to be a good father and husband despite his challenges, which though evident, never really seemed adversely affect the family.
- Cindy simply falls out of love with him despite the way he treats her, which is depicted as quite good until she starts pulling away, then he loses his marbles but never hits her, etc. He’s just deeply hurt.
- The movie ends with Dean pleading for her to change her mind for theirs and Frankie’s sake, but she saying she has NOTHING left for him, zero. She also says she prefers Frankie not grow up in a household where the two parents despise each other. Really sad, I can relate on many levels. But, that's life. Nothing is forever. Dean is shown in the final scene dejected and sullen, walking out of the house and down the sidewalk as Frankie pleads and cries for him to stay. He tells her to go back to her mom as he continues walking as people are setting off fireworks for the 4th of July. The movie ends. Pictures are shown during the credits from their courtship where they both look so happy and in love. There are also flashbacks to this point throughout the movie which makes the ending even sadder and more gut wrenching when you see how far they, mainly Cindy, have fallen out of love.
Takeaways:
- Marriage and LTRs are HUGE gambles. You can do everything "right' as a man and the woman can and usually will fall out of love with you at some point in which it become more of a partnership. Especially in 2021. Think twice about betting everything you have on that.
- It is mainly the man’s (as the leader) responsibility to keep the woman interested, even in marriage. Sacrificing your life, dreams, and goals for her are not the answer and a turn-off in the long run. Being "nice" isn't the answer to a successful marriage or LTR.
-Have goals and aspirations and PURPOSE for two main reasons: 1) You will feel more fulfilled as a person and contributor on this planet. 2) Women are hugely attracted to men with these qualities, not chronic slackers and lazy asses.
Good watch. I'd recommend it. 4.5/5 Stars.
Ciao,
Dash
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
But many relationships in America are like this though, that’s my point.RG is an avowed Feminist. Ain't surprising that he signed onto a role like this, rather than recoiling in disgust
There are indeed, just as there Blacks who embody the stereotypes in Love&Hip Hop and Tyler Perry flicks. Fact is though, these stereotypes about men being pathetic schmucks and Blacks being ratchet wouldn't persist, if folks in both demographics simply stopped taking these rolesBut many relationships in America are like this though, that’s my point.
Male feminist? Wow.RG is an avowed Feminist.
Male feminist? Wow.
I consider male feminists to be weak men.
I mean, if Brad Pitt is a 10 Gosling is still easily a 8+ or 9 but I didn't know Brad Pitt was considered the most attractive man. Who the hell do women even find attractive nowadays anyway?Gosling is the Tom Hanks of our age. I'd rate him as Chad-lite. Attractive enough to not be out of place in a romantic comedy, but not overwhelming so, like Brad Pitt.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.