"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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My Movie Review: Blue Valentine

MatureDJ

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Gosling is the Tom Hanks of our age. I'd rate him as Chad-lite. Attractive enough to not be out of place in a romantic comedy, but not overwhelming so, like Brad Pitt.
 
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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MatureDJ

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A must watch. So is Unfaithful. It checks off all the boxes.

Beta provider slayed Chad who was screwing his wife in the end.


A combination of Chad having much more choice and Normie needing to hang on for dear life - and willing to defend it - could make Chads think twice about whom exactly they tap. I liken it to the way the honey badger fights off lions.

 

MatureDJ

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Indeed, a gamble is a good comparison. For the guys that play poker (especially poker tournaments), you can make all the right moves and right decisions, but a lot of times you'll still lose because you either got unlucky or the other person makes irrational decisions and they somehow got lucky and beat you.

Same with relationships, you can make all the right moves, but if your partner makes irrational decisions, it ultimately won't work out.

That's because we don't live in a vacuum, the actions of others directly impact our lives.
It's OVER for VacuumCels.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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eli77

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If more high school kids especially the guys watch film like this along with movie like kidz. The world will be a better place.
 

Pandora

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This movie is actually among my top 3 favorite movies of all time. The acting is superb. It is so good that it looks almost voyeuristic. The director Derek Cianfrance is said to be inspired by his parent's divorce.

He made another movie called Place Beyond the Pines that could have been an awesome movie but halfway through it turned into trash.
 

Travel memoir21

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Here in The Philippines, in The Iloilo Islands….Im chilling in my hotel room, just got done eating dinner and thinking about past relationships….the movie Blue Valentine come to mind….to all you divorced and older djs whose been in long term relationships….just how accurate was that portrayal? Thanks
 

BaronOfHair

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I saw a few posters talk about this movie recently on SS. Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams are both good actors, so I watched it last night.

My thoughts and review:

The movie is quite good and was up for many awards. Both Gosling and Williams were also nominated multiple times. I won't go into the plot in details, you can read about it or watch the movie. The writers were quite accurate, IMO, about what happens in most marriages and LTRs. They wrote from experience, is my guess.

Some notes:

- I thought Gosling was superb. Was never a huge fan of him, but this movie changed my opinion. I can't help but think at some point he's seen the original Rocky movie (Academy Award for Best Picture 1977), and imitated or channeled Stallone's character, Rocky Balboa. Sans the boxing part, the mannerisms, thinking, speech, attitude, wit, many features of the characters are very similar.

- Williams was very good too. The part that really stuck with me was how appalled and disgusted she was when Dean (Gosling) was trying to make love to her on the floor of the hotel. She gritted her teeth like she just could stand it even though he was trying to be spontaneous and romantic. She just didn’t even want him to touch her. Sinking feeling as he was still very in love with her.

- Gosling is depicted for the most part as the White Knight, marrying Cindy (Williams) after she gets knocked up by another guy. Dean isn’t a p*ussy per se, and he appears to be a really good dad and husband, keeping things light by acting goofy and showing affection to Frankie (kid) and Cindy. BUT, as has been discussed HEAVILY on SS for decades now, he is largely unmotivated with few aspirations. This plus his drinking proves to be his undoing with Cindy. She likely wanted better for her and her daughter. She was a nurse and was likely tired of towing the line the past 5 years.

- There is a part in the movie where Dean is talking to a co-worker. He comments that women are always pursuing “Prince Charming” (Alpha/IDGAF Guy) but always settle for the stable guy with the good job (Beta Male Provider). VERY TRUE.

- The ending is sad, but accurate. I felt really bad for Dean because he was offering his love and support the best he knew how; trying to be a good father and husband despite his challenges, which though evident, never really seemed adversely affect the family.

- Cindy simply falls out of love with him despite the way he treats her, which is depicted as quite good until she starts pulling away, then he loses his marbles but never hits her, etc. He’s just deeply hurt.

- The movie ends with Dean pleading for her to change her mind for theirs and Frankie’s sake, but she saying she has NOTHING left for him, zero. She also says she prefers Frankie not grow up in a household where the two parents despise each other. Really sad, I can relate on many levels. But, that's life. Nothing is forever. Dean is shown in the final scene dejected and sullen, walking out of the house and down the sidewalk as Frankie pleads and cries for him to stay. He tells her to go back to her mom as he continues walking as people are setting off fireworks for the 4th of July. The movie ends. Pictures are shown during the credits from their courtship where they both look so happy and in love. There are also flashbacks to this point throughout the movie which makes the ending even sadder and more gut wrenching when you see how far they, mainly Cindy, have fallen out of love.

Takeaways:

- Marriage and LTRs are HUGE gambles. You can do everything "right' as a man and the woman can and usually will fall out of love with you at some point in which it become more of a partnership. Especially in 2021. Think twice about betting everything you have on that.

- It is mainly the man’s (as the leader) responsibility to keep the woman interested, even in marriage. Sacrificing your life, dreams, and goals for her are not the answer and a turn-off in the long run. Being "nice" isn't the answer to a successful marriage or LTR.

-Have goals and aspirations and PURPOSE for two main reasons: 1) You will feel more fulfilled as a person and contributor on this planet. 2) Women are hugely attracted to men with these qualities, not chronic slackers and lazy asses.

Good watch. I'd recommend it. 4.5/5 Stars.

Ciao,

Dash
RG is an avowed Feminist. Ain't surprising that he signed onto a role like this, rather than recoiling in disgust
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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BaronOfHair

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But many relationships in America are like this though, that’s my point.
There are indeed, just as there Blacks who embody the stereotypes in Love&Hip Hop and Tyler Perry flicks. Fact is though, these stereotypes about men being pathetic schmucks and Blacks being ratchet wouldn't persist, if folks in both demographics simply stopped taking these roles
 

FlexpertHamilton

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The Place Beyond the Pines is Goslings best movie imo. In it, he portrays a very different character from Blue Valentine/Drive, where goes to great lengths to secure a future for his girl and (biological) son, and the entire movie is about the ramifications about that and the legacy you impart on your son. One of my favorite movies of all time, with a powerful message.

Blue Valentine was also good, but incredibly painful and depressing to watch. I need to rewatch it though because my details on it are fuzzy.

Gosling is the Tom Hanks of our age. I'd rate him as Chad-lite. Attractive enough to not be out of place in a romantic comedy, but not overwhelming so, like Brad Pitt.
I mean, if Brad Pitt is a 10 Gosling is still easily a 8+ or 9 but I didn't know Brad Pitt was considered the most attractive man. Who the hell do women even find attractive nowadays anyway?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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eli77

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every five years a movie like this comes along wish more females and males would see it.
 
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