"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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My last thread on this matter...

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mrpickles666

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I know my inner game is far from DJ. But I'm working on it. But I just want to ask one more time about how I handled my last flake. The day of, she said "she felt weird coming to my house" I deflected the flake by saying "didn't think you were coming. I already made plans." She gave me a bs complicated make no sense excuse to which I replied "don't worry about it. Let me know when you want to get together" and went NC (3 days so far). Did i communicate unworthiness when I said "didn't think you were coming?" I mean, I don't know. She usually confirms and she got back to me late so I was frontin' like I just up and made plans for the sake of value. I'm not thrilled with the "didn't think you were coming" either way but did that statement alone pedestal her? If you want to reply to this, I dont want to hear about the low interest level because it wasn't fvcking low, I lowered it with oneitis and by not letting her initiate contact more than me. If you want to reply, analyze my statements and the likelihood that NC could raise respect/attraction in the long run. IVE MOVED ON AND IM DATING OTHER GIRLS OK. No more of that captain obvious sh1t either.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Starwolf

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you should go AFC.

Call her, tell her you miss her and you would really like to see her.

it's clear that keeping up this whole facade has got you all fvcked up.

so get it over with .. Call her!

:up: goodluck



P.S. if it goes ok give an update
if not..also give an update.

then we can see if going AFC once in a while helps :p or if it should be avoided at all costs.
 
logicallefty

logicallefty

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Op I think you handled it acceptability. Now just stay NC and don't dwell on it. If there is any future hope with you and her NC is it, but my gut says you should call this one finished and keep on keeping on.
 
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mrpickles666

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logicallefty said:
Op I think you handled it acceptability. Now just stay NC and don't dwell on it. If there is any future hope with you and her NC is it, but my gut says you should call this one finished and keep on keeping on.
Click to expand...
Well, in essence, NC is calling it finished but also potential remedy for an over pursuer. My situation was created by very subtle mistakes. The frustrating part of it is they were really dumb and easily avoidable on my part. I got more than the time of day from her. But what do you mean by gut feeling?
 
logicallefty

logicallefty

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mrpickles666 said:
Well, in essence, NC is calling it finished but also potential remedy for an over pursuer. My situation was created by very subtle mistakes. The frustrating part of it is they were really dumb and easily avoidable on my part. I got more than the time of day from her. But what do you mean by gut feeling?
Click to expand...
Gut feeling = my opinion based on the facts you articulated in your original post
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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mrpickles666

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For the sake of my insomnia (not because of the situation, I just have insomnia) could you elaborate?
 
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mrpickles666

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logicallefty said:
Gut feeling = my opinion based on the facts you articulated in your original post
Click to expand...
like what specifically in my OP? You think it's less than 50/50?
 
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