"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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My gf apologized to her ex

topmanbarry

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Is this a red flag? My gf and I were talking abiut Her relationship with Her ex of 8 months and she realized how manipulative she was to him . Things with her family was really bad and she said that she used him as a comfort blanket and someone to be there for her when Noone else wanted to be .She sent a long paragraph about how she is sorry for everything . I don't know if this is disrespectful or if I am overreacting .
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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ImTheDoubleGreatest!

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Take what she says with a grain of salt, and move cautiously. He is occupying her mind and THAT is the essence of getting a girl to like you, even if she has hateful thoughts towards you at first....

Be careful.
 

way2smart

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He is definitely on her mind, maybe more so than you are.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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redbaron5

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I would be more concerned about the fact she is admitting to being a manipulative user of people than worrying about her messaging her exbf.
 

zekko

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redbaron5 said:
I would be more concerned about the fact she is admitting to being a manipulative user of people than worrying about her messaging her exbf.
I agree with this.

I wouldn't sweat the apologizing to the ex-boyfriend in and of itself - unless it was mixed with other warning signs.
 

Dhoulmagus

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Why did you bring up her ex in the first place??? The fact you care means you are insecure and its showing to her.
 

Fireballs

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topmanbarry said:
6 months.
I don't think it was disrespectful. Your girlfriend needed closure and sending that text to him has given it to her.

However, be weary of how she is treating you.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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chuck-101

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Hedge you dealings with her and still meet other women. It's an orange flag, but still a slight concern. But far as she knows, you can care less because she's luck to be with you. Don't mention to her this concerns you.
 

The Duke

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A lot of times therapist will recommend the one in counseling apologize to an ex as a means to get past what is bothering them. I wouldn't worry too much about it, however the fact that she was a manipulator will remain. And someday you might be on the receiving end of that. Perhaps you have helped her understand some of her manipulative ways? What has brought this to the surface for her?
 

sylvester the cat

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Um. Yes. It is a HUGE red flag. Manipulative? Keeping in touch with exes? This would break the boundary code stipulated upon becoming exclusive. Grounds for termination of contract/relationship.
 

GS750

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Agreed. Keeping in touch with exes is always a big red flag. Don't care how she rationalizes it. He's on her mind. Why?
 
Last edited:

hockeyfreak79

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Yeah 6 months in & she's pulling this sh*t. Anytime a woman starts sabotaging a relationship it's the biggest red flag IMO. This usually doesn't stop......make note OP.

I hear what PAIRS saying that does makes sense, just judge her off her actions towards you OP.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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MillionBillionaire

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A woman... showing remorse and "just wanting some closure.." BUAHAHAHAHAH HAHAHHA BUHAHAHAH times infinity billion.

Yeah right. Yes it's a red flag.

Caps for emphasis.
 

mangotot

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How do you know you if you are being used as a blanket too? This is the thing with women. They could very easily go and find a guy to provide comfort while many men in similar situation are totally on their own. With no support whatsoever and relying solely on their own resources.
 

topmanbarry

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She tells me that she loves him as a friend because he waa there for her in her depressive state
 

zekko

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topmanbarry said:
She tells me that she loves him as a friend because he waa there for her in her depressive state
This sounds like she is having trouble moving on from him.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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