Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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My biggest problem

steve_erkle

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I'm not really a big fan of approaching and **** because I'm still in high school and there's already a lot of hotties there and I know most of them. So the whole cold approaching ascept is unimportant to me.

What is important to me is inner game, just being confident and natural. I believe that if you are completely confident and natural, everything comes to you easily and there's no need for techniques or stuff like that. My problem is that I am a bit shy, and don't really have that confidence. And I don't just mean around girls, I mean everyone, including friends and family. I constantly subconciously feel like I'm holding back from being myself and can't let go of my inhibitions.

I know that I have a awesome personality because back when I wasn't shy like this and was confident I attracted some awesome people and I was just a lot of fun. I want to be like this again, but idk how.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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steve_erkle

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I haven't read the whole book but I read some of his good stuff. I dont mean to sound like a **** but I've been reading stuff like that for two years so I'm doubtful it will make a big difference. I guess I could be wrong though.

Anyone else been in my situation ?
 

Warrior74

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What happened to make you retreat back into a shell? Do you know? Figure that out.

Start taking action. You sound like you are afraid. So how do you get over fear? By thinking about it? By mulling it over? Or by doing what you are afraid of? Face your fear or it will climb up your back and consume you.

Say one thing everyday that you are terrified of saying. Say it anyway. Accept the consequences. And watch that it won't be as bad as you think. I promise. Good luck.
 

steve_erkle

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Warrior74 said:
What happened to make you retreat back into a shell? Do you know? Figure that out.

Start taking action. You sound like you are afraid. So how do you get over fear? By thinking about it? By mulling it over? Or by doing what you are afraid of? Face your fear or it will climb up your back and consume you.

Say one thing everyday that you are terrified of saying. Say it anyway. Accept the consequences. And watch that it won't be as bad as you think. I promise. Good luck.
Well, I had been shy all my life, and then I met this amazing girl and realized I wanted her and completely changed myself to get her. I started working out, seriously improved my looks, and uhh.. I guess when girls started liking the way I looked I got confidence from that which helped me make some friends and etc. So everything went up from there and I got the girl and people started liking me and looking up to me. Suddenl all the girlswanted me, but I was serious abcout my girl, so I ignored the others. For some reason i started losing my confidenxe and i broke up with herWhen we broke up I was devastated, and uhh yeah I haven't really had the confidence since then. I'm over her.. This was like two years ago.

Hmm.. It's not really that I'm scared it's just that I never feel like myself. I think. **** haha I don't even know what it is.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Warrior74 said:
What happened to make you retreat back into a shell? Do you know? Figure that out.

Start taking action. You sound like you are afraid. So how do you get over fear? By thinking about it? By mulling it over? Or by doing what you are afraid of? Face your fear or it will climb up your back and consume you.

Say one thing everyday that you are terrified of saying. Say it anyway. Accept the consequences. And watch that it won't be as bad as you think. I promise. Good luck.

yes it happened to me, minus getting a hot girlfriend, i got over it , once i accepetd reality, and started being myself, high school is the craziest social setting u can be in, but if u know anything about social dynamics u can be the man, take in what these guys are telling you

i just graduated in 07 and I'm a totally different dude, **** all the girls u can, and dont care what others think, i mean dont go over the edge and stop taking showers, i mean like always have your chin centered, always think positive, grow as person, go on college tours alot of those chicks get freaky in the hotels, everything ur going isnt new someone else has lived it , some are still living it while others have moved on and grown as a person, regain your confidence go get some coochie and you'll feel much better
 

xdreamz

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i dont know if itll work for you but pretending i was a lost student got me pretty damn far.
 

steve_erkle

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imaginemypotential said:
yes it happened to me, minus getting a hot girlfriend, i got over it , once i accepetd reality, and started being myself, high school is the craziest social setting u can be in, but if u know anything about social dynamics u can be the man, take in what these guys are telling you

i just graduated in 07 and I'm a totally different dude, **** all the girls u can, and dont care what others think, i mean dont go over the edge and stop taking showers, i mean like always have your chin centered, always think positive, grow as person, go on college tours alot of those chicks get freaky in the hotels, everything ur going isnt new someone else has lived it , some are still living it while others have moved on and grown as a person, regain your confidence go get some coochie and you'll feel much better
Hmm I like that.

anyone else?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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