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Most women are boring

user252009

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So, what I'm coming to realise is after a lot of interactions with women, dating etc., is that vast majority of women are boring. They have no big goals or passions in their life, no real hobbies (just look at your average woman's Tinder profile), and are usually pretty dull to talk to as well - they care not to converse in deep matters on a somewhat intellectual basis. Yes, many are into sports, but not all of us guys are into that, and you can't really grow much as a person just from sports. So, can we even still find a woman that we genuinely want to be together with, with the potential to grow together as people? Or are we in fact better off spinning plates?
 

Blacksheep

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I would say, spin plates with careful... Cause there is some crazy women too, and they will try to play and fck with you in many ways you would never imagine.

I've been dating some girls, and there is some of them that is actually nice person... but its rare.
 

RangerMIke

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It is VERY hard for me to find a woman that is really interested in the things I care about, but this is why you have guy friends. But you can use this to test the flexibility of women. If she likes you, she will make an effort to develop an interest in what you care about.

It's all about screening out women. Too many men look at dating as a means to get women... I use it to screen out women. It's like a funnel, many come in: few come out. But too many dudes flip the funnel in the opposite direction... with few coming in.

Make her run the obstacle course... too many guys let her skip the ones that are hard, and help her over the others. It's like Ranger School running the Darby Queen... when I went, back in the late 80s, you had to make it over the obstacles or you were out. Now that they allow women in Ranger School, navigating the obstacle course is optional... this is what dudes do with chicks. There are so desperate for a woman to succeed, standards get lowered.

Screen out chicks that are not flexible and just take take take. Then they wonder why sh1t goes sideways with a woman that is not generous with a rigid personality.
 

ThisIsSparta

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So, what I'm coming to realise is after a lot of interactions with women, dating etc., is that vast majority of women are boring. They have no big goals or passions in their life, no real hobbies (just look at your average woman's Tinder profile), and are usually pretty dull to talk to as well - they care not to converse in deep matters on a somewhat intellectual basis. Yes, many are into sports, but not all of us guys are into that, and you can't really grow much as a person just from sports. So, can we even still find a woman that we genuinely want to be together with, with the potential to grow together as people? Or are we in fact better off spinning plates?
Be careful what you wish for......

Are you looking for your ONEITIS?

Id rather have a "boring" woman that knows how to fukk and more or less stays out of my way for the rest of the time then an "exciting" woman that is high-maintainance and wants to "grow together" and 100 other things from me.

In the end we need women for sex and for having kids.

For everyting else i have friends, family, my cats and i am also totaly capable of having a good time just being by myself AND i can grow on my own.
 

samspade

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Id rather have a "boring" woman that knows how to fukk and more or less stays out of my way for the rest of the time then an "exciting" woman that is high-maintainance and wants to "grow together" and 100 other things from me.
The good news is you can have an exciting, interesting woman who also knows how to fukk and isn't high maintenance.

Actually I can teach any woman to be good in bed if she's not already; that part isn't hard to find or instill if you know how to lead. What she does with the other 22 hours of her day are more crucial to me, because it tells me what kind of life she leads and what her interests are.

Like @RangerMIke said, screen, screen, screen.
 

SW15

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So, what I'm coming to realise is after a lot of interactions with women, dating etc., is that vast majority of women are boring. They have no big goals or passions in their life, no real hobbies (just look at your average woman's Tinder profile), and are usually pretty dull to talk to as well - they care not to converse in deep matters on a somewhat intellectual basis. Yes, many are into sports, but not all of us guys are into that, and you can't really grow much as a person just from sports. So, can we even still find a woman that we genuinely want to be together with, with the potential to grow together as people? Or are we in fact better off spinning plates?
Your thoughts are sensible. After numerous interactions in dating endeavors, I've had similar thoughts and may have expressed a similar sentiment in real life conversations.

I play sports more than I watch them, and like athletic women. If a woman and man play the same sport, it is unlikely that the woman plays it as well as the man. My main sport is tennis. In my experience, tennis is not a great way to meet women in one's 20s and 30s (I'm 37). At public courts, you will rarely see 2 women in their 20s/30s playing a singles match. Most attractive women in their 20s/30s at public courts are playing with their boyfriend, husband, brother, or some other male. At private courts, there usually isn't a great membership base of younger women. Private courts are often a good way to meet late 30s-early 50s year old women, most of whom are divorced.

I've found it better to focus on women who are generally fit and do some other fitness activities besides tennis with them.

I think part of the boring women problem boils down to how dates are sourced. Sourcing dates on swipe apps when the interaction has been behind an electronic screen isn't the best way to determine compatability. A lot of times, there's a 2 hour date at a bar or now at an outdoor coffee shop, the man foots the bill, the woman gets a freebie, and the man is pisssed he wasted 2 hours, $20-$40, and didn't get sex or a 2nd date from the whole endeavor. A good portion of that problem can be solved by only sourcing dates in real life. Ideally, the dates are sourced through a common social network, which increases the probability of a good date or at least a good experience figuring out that there's not a good fit there. The next best option would be cold approaching in real life, but that's barely better than swiping. I've been surprised at how lousy I've been treated on approaches/dates from women I've met on walking paths, at the grocery store, at the gym/fitness classes, etc. The idea is to go on fewer dates and have fewer interactions than massive amounts of swiping and texting, but higher quality ones. That might reduce the boring factor a little bit.

Now that they allow women in Ranger School, navigating the obstacle course is optional... this is what dudes do with chicks. There are so desperate for a woman to succeed, standards get lowered.
The majority of men are sexual scavengers. The majority of men will put up with anything for sex or the promise of getting some future sex. It's bad.

Esther Vilar dedicated a whole chapter to this very thing. Even very “accomplished” women are incredibly lazy in high end positions.

Very few women will actually take on physical labor. Nope. They want CEO jobs. What do you think the purpose for the bulk of them to get college degrees is for? From their viewpoint, more authority with less work. They are lazy.

They excel greatly at service jobs. Nursing, retail, clerical etc.
The white collar career-obsessed woman is often boring. She's quite dedicated to her meaningless office role.

The mass entrance of women into the workforce has made both the work experience and personal life factors worse for both men and women.
 

Poonani Maker

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I had a nightmare where a fat gal was throwing kleenex boxes at me and a few other women were arguing with me I'd retaliated slightly physically and they ALL blew it out of proportion upping the lies. Utter nightmare dream where decoration (breast medals) cops showed up, before all the women start REALLY telling "stories." These were liberal women at some small party or something, a banquet or something in the dream. I woke up praising Lord Jesus cause it seemed so real. I think it's long work days and my hard workouts over the weekend that's influencing bad dreams. I had no true friend in that room but one, an older bald (has lost a lot of relatives suddenly over the past few years) guy I've worked with. He was my only hope of having my back against the accusations of what went on in the room in the dream. These women were all of the Millennial and Gen-Z only-cellphone/net-known eras. My workout this past weekend involved heavier punching than usual, more aggression. If my workout includes kicking or kickboxing then I'm less aggressive more somber. You see a tendency of fighters holding back the kicks (at least the high or liver ones) in preference of just boxing too to keep the aggression up.
 

ThisIsSparta

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The good news is you can have an exciting, interesting woman who also knows how to fukk and isn't high maintenance.

Actually I can teach any woman to be good in bed if she's not already; that part isn't hard to find or instill if you know how to lead. What she does with the other 22 hours of her day are more crucial to me, because it tells me what kind of life she leads and what her interests are.

Like @RangerMIke said, screen, screen, screen.
Everything is relative. What is "boring" for him might be "interesting" for her and who is he to judge that knitting aint "interesting" and worthy a womans time?

If you can teach ANY woman how to be good in bed you can teach ANY woman how to not be "boring".

And at the end of the day i dont expect a woman to make my life interesting and exciting.
It is supposed to be that way BEFORE you invite a woman to complement it.

What she does with the other 22 hours i of course of importance. But that doesnt mean she is supposed to be a mans animation program and neither vice versa.
 

Lookatu

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If she likes you, she will make an effort to develop an interest in what you care about.

It's all about screening out women.

Screen out chicks that are not flexible and just take take take.
This.
I found this to be true. Majority of the gals I've had relationships with all made efforts to support or participate with me in my interests and hobbies.

Screening women and the first couple dates are critical in getting a feel for how open minded and flexible she is to trying new things.

For example, instant red flag and rejection is if her favorite thing to do on the weekends is brunch, which I'm finding a lot of these days.

My current plate likes to go paddleboarding with me and discover new lakes and beaches on the weekends, so that is an added bonus in addition to the sex we have. She would also like to have sex with me everyday or anytime I want to which is also nice. But I've been the limiting factor on that one as my libido isn't as high as a 18yo and I have other things to do during the week.
 

RangerMIke

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The majority of men are sexual scavengers. The majority of men will put up with anything for sex or the promise of getting some future sex. It's bad.
Sad but true. The biggest bullsh1t phrase ever spoken is "Happy wife: happy life." Men have been conditioned to pander to the emotional whims of women. This might have working in the 19th century, when men had some authority, but now... it is epically harmful.

Why bust your @ss trying to make a chick happy, when if she is unhappy, there is little you can do to change that. I know men that do nothing but dance dance dance... and the woman just takes takes takes... there is no reciprocity, and many of my married friends MIGHT get sex once a week like she's handing out Scobey Snacks.... and when he gets sex he has to load up on Viagra because his wife has morphed into a fat pig. It's not the woman's fault, IT'S YOURS, for failing to screen out bad women and putting up with it.

I had an uncle that died a couple of years ago... he was one of these men, and my aunt just dogged him out his whole married life... the man busted his butt in a futile attempt to make her happy working well into his 70s, and when he got sick and couldn't work. All she did was b1tch about not having enough money. This went on for a few years, until nature ran it's course. I don't remember my aunt shedding one tear for him, when we were cleaning out their house, because she was moving in with my cousin (who I'm sure is going to be used like his dad). She just tossed all my uncle's stuff in the trash with ZERO thought or remorse.

This is what happens when you end up with the wrong fvcking woman. It is better to be by yourself then to be chained to a chick like this. If you are in a situation like this, you can not fix this by 'trying harder', it's too late, you ended up with the wrong woman because you let your hormones control your rational decision making, just go get fvcking divorced... sure you are going to take it in the shorts in divorce court, but it is worth it.
 

bat soup

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So, what I'm coming to realise is after a lot of interactions with women, dating etc., is that vast majority of women are boring. They have no big goals or passions in their life, no real hobbies (just look at your average woman's Tinder profile), and are usually pretty dull to talk to as well - they care not to converse in deep matters on a somewhat intellectual basis. Yes, many are into sports, but not all of us guys are into that, and you can't really grow much as a person just from sports. So, can we even still find a woman that we genuinely want to be together with, with the potential to grow together as people? Or are we in fact better off spinning plates?
Men and women are different. If you think about it, men are rarely interested in what women like (clothes, shoes, fashion, gossip etc) and women are rarely interested in what we like (technology, gaming, sports, etc). Sometimes you can find some common ground, but often not much. But then, when you approach a girl that you find attractive, it's generally because she has a nice figure and a beautiful face, not because you want to discuss your hobbies with her.
 

SW15

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Sad but true. The biggest bullsh1t phrase ever spoken is "Happy wife: happy life." Men have been conditioned to pander to the emotional whims of women. This might have working in the 19th century, when men had some authority, but now... it is epically harmful.
My father used to say something that he was running his life around making my mother happy. It was pretty detrimental for me to get this sort of messaging growing up. My parents did eventually have an acrimonious divorce when I was 15.

My father was saying that stuff mostly in the 1990s, well after its useful life as an idea had ended.

Men haven't had authority in the house since some point before the 1990s when I grew up.

Why bust your @ss trying to make a chick happy, when if she is unhappy, there is little you can do to change that. I know men that do nothing but dance dance dance... and the woman just takes takes takes... there is no reciprocity, and many of my married friends MIGHT get sex once a week like she's handing out Scobey Snacks.... and when he gets sex he has to load up on Viagra because his wife has morphed into a fat pig. It's not the woman's fault, IT'S YOURS, for failing to screen out bad women and putting up with it.
To a lot of men, once a week sex doesn't sound too bad. Recall that 28% of 18-29 year old men had no sex in calendar year 2018. These are men in the primes of their life. If you add in the 18-29 year old men only having sporadic, irregular sex, that probably pushes it up to 35-40%. This sporadic, irregular sex is less than once a week. To a lot of men, the worst part of that scenario is not the frequency. The worst part is that the sex would be with an overweight woman.

I had an uncle that died a couple of years ago... he was one of these men, and my aunt just dogged him out his whole married life... the man busted his butt in a futile attempt to make her happy working well into his 70s, and when he got sick and couldn't work. All she did was b1tch about not having enough money. This went on for a few years, until nature ran it's course. I don't remember my aunt shedding one tear for him, when we were cleaning out their house, because she was moving in with my cousin (who I'm sure is going to be used like his dad). She just tossed all my uncle's stuff in the trash with ZERO thought or remorse.

This is what happens when you end up with the wrong fvcking woman. It is better to be by yourself then to be chained to a chick like this. If you are in a situation like this, you can not fix this by 'trying harder', it's too late, you ended up with the wrong woman because you let your hormones control your rational decision making, just go get fvcking divorced... sure you are going to take it in the shorts in divorce court, but it is worth it.
Life is too short to be married to the wrong woman. I'm 37, never been married, and no kids. In a previous era, that would have made me really weird. In the current era, where Millennials have faced an absurdly bad mating environment, I'm not that unusual. My life choices over the years have prevented some of the worst downside risks. I never got any of my relationships close to the point of marriage. In my sex life, I have regularly used condoms, and most of the women I have had sex with used birth control as well. My personal life is a mess right now, but having a child with a woman and not having relational stability with her would have been a worse outcome for me.

To the original point, I think the idea of most women being boring has something to do with our dysfunctional mating environment. Men are sexual scavengers and women are absurdly hypergamous. Because men are sexual scavengers and often lacking sex, societal problems such as simping, porn addiction, OnlyFans, thirst, etc are occurring. Men are having a hard time connecting with women because we can't think clearly as we're primarily focused upon getting the bang. Women are having a hard time connecting due to promiscuous pasts, hypergamous desires, endless options, and some other factors. When these two random people are put together through swipe apps, it is the worst possible outcome because the women see the men as a walking wallet who might be able to fucck them and the men see the women as a walking combo of titts, vag, and asss.
 

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So are most guys.
Yes! The perspective OP has discovered here is the same one women (with abundant options) has. They have options and it turns out most guys are dull, they tire from seeing the 100th guy making the same approach and doing the same boring nothing like the 99 other dudes before. Most men become predictable, they're looking for the anomaly.

When desperation ends you see this perspective clearly and join the side that can choose rather than just hope to be chosen. Men also start seeing patterns, women doing the same predictable dull stuff and we too start looking for the anomaly.

@RangerMIke nails it. That's how we operate when any woman just isn't good enough anymore, when we want to find the right woman for ourselves and not settle for less.
 

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That's only if you live in the romantic paradigm. When I had abundance and discovered 90% of women were either needy or entitled, I didn't look for the 10%. Because that would make ME needy.

I simply looked for self fulfillment. And the 10% shows up.

Romance doesn't work the way most people think it does. It has nothing to do with you LOOKING.

It has everything to do with how you are BEING.
I absolutely agree, I could have articulated it more accurately. I meant passively look, not actively. To know which women who turn up in your life are interesting enough to bother spending time on, rather than regard any and all women worth your time.

As you say, that is a consequence of being self fulfilled.
 

Who Dares Win

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Women are for intimacy and relax, if you are into finance or politics forget about it.

"Travels, tattoos, sushi, celebrities and gossip" are basically the standard interestes of 90% of women.

Yet the worst you can get are women who understand they lack something but they find the wrong object to fill it, thats when you get that cancer of "sapiosexual, art and philosophy" girls, basically normal girls who learn and repeat concepts and lines from someone else that have no particular meaning or utility.

Most women dont even bother to learn how to do basic maintenance to their own car (change the oil, check tyre pressure) and are totally ignorant in finance.

So unless you are very lucky the most you can get out of a relationship is emotional support and nurture beside sex.

We are wired differently anyway so makes much more sense to accept reality, we dont usually give a fvck about the private life of a singer as much as they dont usually give a fvck about the specs of the car they just bought.
 

EyeOnThePrize

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The women you meet is in part a reflection of yourself and current life situation. Tinder is more or less a shotgun approach, you really don't know what you're getting until you meet up and talk. You're describing the average girl, and the average guy is also not very bright and not very interesting, that's the definition of average. And as averages they are the most abundant.

But aside from dating apps the women you meet will be at your caliber. What I mean is if you frequent a gym you're more likely to meet fit bunnies. If you frequent MENSA or the equivalent you're more likely to meet women smarter than you. If you frequent smelly bars then you're more likely to find alcoholic wh0res. If you frequent tinder then you're more likely to get the most average girl in the city.

To all the posters in this thread that are bashing women; the sooner you learn to filter, lead, and mold a woman in your image the sooner you'll realize just how much influence you have in her life. When a woman looks up to you, when you inspire her, she'll die for you. She'll be staring at your mouth waiting for your next words, because she senses that you're nurturing the relationship and wants more. You can inspire all women, including the ones you don't want to be with.

To hate sub par women for sub par behavior is silly, what did you expect? You might as well yell at the clouds when it rains.
 
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