"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Moaning Neighbor

amoka

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There is 50 something years old guy who lives right above me and every time his girlfriend comes over they have continues sex and the bed makes squeaky noise and the lady moans like a porn start. I barely can sleep whenever they are on it. I'm thinking about telling him about it. Or maybe call him in the middle of it next time it happens. What do you all suggest?
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Dust 2 Dust

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My neighbors have loud sex as well. At night I turn on a box fan to drown them out.
 

window

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leave an anonamous message under his door saying that he sounds like a squeeling wild boar when he orgasms...
 

tinctrar

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I hate to say it but I think im that guy. And it is never me making all the noise either - and I do feel quite bad for my neighbors.

It helps if your friendly with them. It would be alot easier to ease into the conversation. I try to make sure all my windows are closed (made that mistake a couple of times before and had security at my place - no bueno. We have alot of gated security communities here)

If its any consoliation to you - I wish there was something I can tell you. But its hard to tell the plate to stfu. Know what I mean? Anything short of putting a pillow over them doesnt really help.

Some of the women I sleep with are conscious about it though.

If I were your neighbor and you approached me about it I would sincerely apologize and then buy you a fine scotch for your troubles. Because I know for sure its hard for me to control the plate im with for that night. Blue Label would fit the bill, no?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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5string

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Ask him politely to do it on the chair instead. A little duct tape for her mouth might be a nice touch as well. Seriously though. A box fan would work pretty good. I have slept with one going at night for years. It drowns out noises that would normally wake me up.
 

amoka

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The box fan idea seems pretty good but I want to be able to sleep. I generally have trouble sleeping so introducing box fan will certainly not put me to sleep.
 

5string

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amoka said:
The box fan idea seems pretty good but I want to be able to sleep. I generally have trouble sleeping so introducing box fan will certainly not put me to sleep.
Try the box fan just for the heck of it. A little white noise while you are sleepin is a good thing. To put an end to it, may just need to have a chat with the guy. Be cool. Tell him you envy him and all, but it's really causing you not to get much sleep. Could get after him and tell him they sound like two cats hung over a clothsline. Just kidding.....
 

Teflon_Mcgee

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5string said:
Try the box fan just for the heck of it. A little white noise while you are sleepin is a good thing. To put an end to it, may just need to have a chat with the guy. Be cool. Tell him you envy him and all, but it's really causing you not to get much sleep. Could get after him and tell him they sound like two cats hung over a clothsline. Just kidding.....

Box fans are great.

I've been using one since I was a kid. I cannot sleep without one.
The way it drowns everything out is nice.....
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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amoka

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Talked to him about it today. We'll see if it happens again... lol
 
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