"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
mixed messages
- Thread starter Atldude
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
_DracoLord_
Don Juan
- Joined
- Feb 6, 2007
- Messages
- 11
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Forget about her.
WhitePimp
Master Don Juan
Rollo Tomassi
Master Don Juan
Women with high IL wont confuse you. When a woman wants to fukk she'll find a way to fukk. If she's fluctuating between being into you and then not, put her away for a while and spin other plates. If she sorts it out for herself and pursues you, then you are still playing in your frame and you maintain the value of your attention to her. It's when you patiently while away your time wondering what the magic formula is that'll bring her around that you lean over into her frame.
What most guys think are 'mixed messages' or confusing behavior coming from a woman is simply due to their inability (for whatever reason) to make an accurate interpretation of why she's behaving in such a manner. Usually this boils down to a guy getting so wrapped up in a girl (i.e. ONEitis) that he'd rather make concessions for this behavior than see it for what it really is. In other words, it's far easier to call it 'mixed messages' or fall back on the old chestnut of how fickle women are, when in fact it's simply a rationale to keep themselves on the hook, so to speak, because they lack any real, viable, options with other women in their lives. A woman that has a high IL in a guy has no need (and less motivation) to engage in behaviors that would compromise her status with him. Women of all ILs will sh!t test, and men will pass or fail accordingly, but a test is more easily recognizable.
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
so this is what i am going to do..: i am going to stay offline (or maybe i should stay on line and ignore her?) the next two weeks and then one week before i get to her city i am going to txt her to set a date up.. and then disappear again... and then confirm a couple of days before... and then finally on the day i am going to call her to pick me up/ meet me at location...
what dy'all think?
cedd
Don Juan
ask yourself if shes worth the effort.
if you really want to see if shes interested or not : CALL HER AND ASK HER OUT !
if shes interested she'll accept your offer. if she doesn't accept or says some 'I don't know...bla bla' b****s then hang up and forget about her.
cheers
Rollo Tomassi said:
Golden.Rollo Tomassi said:
When you have other things (or spinning plates) going on in your life that are more important you won't have to resort to "pretending" like you do, and your behavior will exude this on it's own.
It's funny how you could call a guy an AFC for behaving a certain way toward a chick he likes, but you put this same guy in a situation where he doesn't really care about whatever chick he's with or the outcome of his relationship and you'd call him the jerk that women seem to love. This behavior manifests itself due to circumstance (of course it varies from person to person as well).
EDIT: I realise it's going to be difficult to not go for coffee with her, as you obviously seem to like her, but trust me it really will increase her interest level (provided she's slightly interested to begin with). So far you are appearing too intense, always available and frankly quite a desperate case. You mention that you don't want to get played, but you must realise that it is you who needs to be doing all the playing.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Most women don't like direct conflict so you're unlikely to get a honest answer if you ask that, and it makes you seem needy and desperate. She'll probably keep giving you mixed messages and wait for you to get a clue.
The prescription:
* Don't chat online except to set up something in person.
* Don't waste time with low interest women
* Go outside and get some numbers
Get at 'em tiger.
Atldude said:
nice.fbplayer06 said:I agree. Imagine asking her that question: regardless of how she responds, do you really expect there to be no awkwardness after you find out where you two stand? If she says she's serious, *and tells you this*, what then? I think it's better for this feeling to develop "under the radar" without either person blatantly telling the other that it's happening.
If she answers with "Let's just be friends,"nervous
Whatever happens, good luck man.
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
so this is what i think i am going to do... i was supposed to be at her city this weekend to visit some other people.. but can't because of work.. but will be visiting sometime this month or early next month... so i am going to just pop up.. and then give her a call when i am there.. and then try and arrange smthng ad-hoc.. and see how she responds...
regards