JohnChops
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 9, 2012
- Messages
- 2,734
- Reaction score
- 481
I would've left if she kept me waiting for 30 mins and she's only a 6?! Holy **** I would've been out of there faster than you could blink.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Chumpher: listen, my very good female friend just got mad at ther boyfriend, do you mind if we just go the three of us to have a drink so I can cheer her up and then we go back to your place?
me: alright.
Translation: You're a chumpy dude who will be my castrated orbiter friend. Stick around!her: hey, I had such a great time with you. You're charming and very funy, I really like you!!
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
HalfPUAHalfAFC said:She was fishing for a guy to hang with that night. She had sent out several "feelers" and there were other options she hoped would come through instead of you.
There was no girlfriend with a boyfriend problem.
Her other options didn't pan out.
One of them kept her hanging past the last minute (i.e., when she agreed you would pick her up).
She didn't dress up because her other option was going to be a more casual get together, probably a FWB situation she didn't need to doll herself up for.
When that fell through, she thought, "What the heck...I might as well go out with him, nothing to lose."
She wanted to go to your place for a few reasons:
1. She didn't want to bump into other guys she was fishing for.
2. She would get a few free drinks and a movie out of it, plus some attention.
3. If you were super smooth and had game to turn her on, she thought maybe it could be a slim chance for a decent lay.
You did not give her the game she wanted or could not turn down. She went through with the "date" because, well, why not. It beats boredom and validates her belief that guys want her.
She doesn't see you as a tier-A guy but a tier-B guy. Decent if that's what you want to be. However, given that she wouldn't let you escalate sexually, I'm guessing she's probably written you off by now.
My advice: move on unless you just want to practice skills for a bang. In any case, she doesn't want to either boyfriend you or even FWB you.
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.