"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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ME and my G/f are seeing who can go longer w/o masturbating

theonedude

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good lord, its only been 3 days!!

i notice im a lot hornier now tho, but its SOO hard.
altho i like feeling all lusty and stuff.
ne tips for staying the path and not masturbating.
cuz if i lose, she'll prolly think i have no self control.

P.S. i, of course have a good offense, and am trying to turn her on a lot, Quite fun.

soo, i need tips to turn her the hell on, like REALLY ON so that she caves, and i need soem tips for stayign with the not masturbatin.

plus these are always good cuz everyone reads these.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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PatrickWasHere

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Is ti masturbating, or doe sit include head and such?

If it does include head and whatnot, go with the 69 when you and her are really turned on. you'lll relieve eachother stress :)
 

Escalade

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Just be like "Since we can't masturbate ourselves we can just help out each other" and get some play in. Oh, and if you really need to do it, how would she know? Is she gonna smell your **** for lotion?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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ShizamDaMan

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You'll lose man, sorry. Longest I went was 20 days in a contest between friends.
 

Need-2-B-Pimpin

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I managed to go 16 years without it...so much for stopping now though.
 

Moonsong

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There's a "Zen Plateau" after two or three weeks. You just stop wanting to do it. Not that it kills your sex drive or anything, but it does get better. Good luck!
 

4nando

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moonsong speaks the truth. I can't remember the last time I yanked my chain, but it was quite some time ago. (We're talking months here though, which isn't that impressive except as a personal record.) After a while, you start to realize that sex isn't so important, and you don't need to masturbate constantly. Start applying it to other things, and suddenly you will see the events of your life and the past and the future come together. it's really weird when you realize that you're missing out on this when you masturbate. and then you just shun it forever.

go ahead, call me gay. i'd get angry if i weren't a zen master.
 

Nightspark

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lol i had something like that going down with my Ex... but it was less intense... and i won =) hehehe

just channel urr sex drive on something... pushups help, since they make ur arms tired and you yourself tired... on top of that you fitter each time.. so when urr horny channel it to something constructive like exercise...

if u wanna make her horny i guess u can start doing phone sex with her or something... works like a charm =) only if urr really descriptive and well good at it
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Kraken

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I personally try not to masturbate during certain time periods including: when I'm looking for girls, and when I'm with a girl. When I'm loaded with testosterone I feel much more energetic and outgoing with the ladies, and if I'm not single at the time, well, sex is just that much better.
 

niggah

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just **** another chick, thats not considered masterbation technically
 

Omega

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Hows she going to know if you jerk it? :confused:
 

DirkPitt

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Originally posted by Need-2-B-Pimpin
I managed to go 16 years without it...so much for stopping now though.
dang, that's 3 years more than this guy
 

triple_ultima

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Originally posted by 4nando
moonsong speaks the truth. I can't remember the last time I yanked my chain, but it was quite some time ago. (We're talking months here though, which isn't that impressive except as a personal record.) After a while, you start to realize that sex isn't so important, and you don't need to masturbate constantly. Start applying it to other things, and suddenly you will see the events of your life and the past and the future come together. it's really weird when you realize that you're missing out on this when you masturbate. and then you just shun it forever.

go ahead, call me gay. i'd get angry if i weren't a zen master.
You have intrigued me. I just might have to try not flogging the dolphin, but man it'll be tough. I can't even go one day without it...:(

Oh and by the way, girls are insanely good at not "feeding the clam" when they don't want to. She'll probably win.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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