"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Looking for help with congruence

thefenix

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I'm new to this forum, but I've read a bunch of articles, and it seems like a lot of people have lots of great experience and advice to offer.

I have a problem with congruence between how I think and how I conduct myself. I consider myself to be a mature man, and I "get it." I understand what is happening on every level when I talk to women and see others interacting. I give many of my friends advice for their relationships, and it tends to be right on.

However, when I am with women I just freeze up. I understand all of their cues and body language, but I just find myself at a loss. It's like I know how to act, but I always fall back into my old habits of interacting with women.

Does anyone have any advice for manning up when in the spotlight?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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thefenix

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There are some small things like smiling like a doofus, not projecting my voice well, and using weak eye contact.

And then there are bigger things like being weak with my views, being a bit of a pushover, and not taking control of planning and the situation in general. I turn into a complete cliche nice guy.
 

thefenix

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There are some small things like smiling like a doofus, not projecting my voice well, and using weak eye contact.

And then there are bigger things like being weak with my views, being a bit of a pushover, and not taking control of planning and the situation in general. I turn into a complete cliche nice guy.
 
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To be honest with you kid - you are the only person who can change yourself - you know what is wrong - as you stated - I suggest you do the opposite of what you have been doing, considering that what you are doing is unsatisfactory - you know the answer, why not tell us!!

I'll tell you straight - start pursuing women romantically - and not for a jolly good time!!
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

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