So Friday my roommate in NY brings home some chick and not only is she still here Sunday but she smokes and he lets her when I'm asleep. There are 6 butts in the ashtray. Neither of us smokes. Is it just me or is that wrong on many fronts? Because she never left I haven't been able to talk to him yet. I think he's whipped.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Letting a smoker smoke in your house?
- Thread starter bigneil
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
U
user43770
Guest
I would be pissed.
incognito42
Master Don Juan
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- May 15, 2005
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- 40
If they knew you didnt allow smoking inside and did it when you were sleeping cause you wouldn't know, I'd deff confront them and be pissed about it no matter who it was
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Sir Psycho Sexy
Senior Don Juan
Why did you have an ashtray in the house then? It gives the impression smoking is allowed indoors. Either way it's not a big deal. Just tell her no smoking in the house...most smokers will respect someones home.
I hate being around cig smoke and 3 of my 6 roommates smoke. They are pretty good about going on the porch.
I hate being around cig smoke and 3 of my 6 roommates smoke. They are pretty good about going on the porch.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
backseatjuan
Banned
Smoking home is wrong, doesn't matter if you have a roommate or not. You should tell her nicely to stop outside if she wants to smoke, and if she ignores you, or forgets, tell her to leave.
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BeDJ
Guest
Where did the ashtray come from?
By allowing someone to smoke indoors, you are showing lack of respect for your house and those you share it with.
By allowing someone to smoke indoors, you are showing lack of respect for your house and those you share it with.
Bokanovsky
Master Don Juan
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This. Why didn't you tell her to stop smoking?Burroughs said:
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
I tell people to smoke at the window. Even though I hardly respect my own boundaries, everyone knows this about me and respects it. Make it clear in your mind that you won't have it. Then communicate it, that doesn't have to be forceful, just consistent. You can do it in a pleasant way.
You can just start off with "I'm sorry but eh... "
You can just start off with "I'm sorry but eh... "
backseatjuan
Banned
God damn guys, you are truly retarded in the USA! Congrads! Must be the fluoride in your water that making your IQ some 50 points less than it should be. Hey I read somewhere that in USA they had to lower average acceptable IQ or something. Geeezeeeee. What to do when someone smokes in your house, geeezeeee.
Retards!
Retards!