Let’s normalize getting laid

[tksniper]

Every time I see a post about someone finally getting laid, I cringe. Getting laid is not some special event that only “alpha males” can partake in. Case in point - I have a moving business where guys move furniture for me. I employ mostly big black dudes and I routinely see women (house wives) throwing themselves at these dudes and exchanging numbers. It literally happens every single day.

And now you have your “pickup artist” who thinks he’s the hottest thing since sliced bread, yet he feels like he needs to do 100 approaches a week and if he doesn’t, men would never figure out how to get laid.

Guys - people are getting laid everyday and guys who have sexual value to women are constantly getting hit on. This is normal. You aren’t special because some random chick made eye contact with you.

Attractive women have an insatiable sexual drive and they literally have an ecosystem of men taking care of their needs.

And yes, I got the word “ecosystem” from actual women. I’ve written posts in the past about how women seemingly have a validation ecosystem of desperate men. But I didn’t come up with that concept. I got it from women on instagram.

At the end of the day, if you aren’t getting hit on by hot women, then you aren’t attractive enough.

That has to be the litmus test. How many attractive women are hitting on you, and not how many women you are hitting on. Because I see guys get hit on all the time.

Women are always trying to hook up with guys they are attracted to. There’s no stupid game to figure out.

 

[corrector]

At the end of the day, if you aren’t getting hit on by hot women, then you aren’t attractive enough.

Being passively hit on is rare for most guys, even decent-looking ones. That doesn’t mean you’re unattractive — it just means you need to create opportunities instead of expecting them.

 

[BPH]

Every time I see a post about someone finally getting laid, I cringe. Getting laid is not some special event that only “alpha males” can partake in.

And now you have your “pickup artist” who thinks he’s the hottest thing since sliced bread, yet he feels like he needs to do 100 approaches a week and if he doesn’t, men would never figure out how to get laid.

You aren’t special because some random chick made eye contact with you.

Well...I feel personally attacked

Guys - people are getting laid everyday and guys who have sexual value to women are constantly getting hit on.

Let's be real, this is anecdotal...

Based on the statistics I was able to find, somewhere between 1 in 4 and 1 in 3 men under the age of 30 haven't had sex in the last year. Only about 1 in 3 men in that same age bracket are having sex at least once per week.

It is by no means the "norm" to be getting laid regularly outside of being in a long-term relationship, which is why we have the red pill movement, the male loneliness epidemic, forums like this one, etc.

 

[crowolf]

What is your point?

That a guy who is a "natural" or has good genetics doesn't struggle getting laid?

I mean, that's nothing new under the sun.

Maybe you are dissing the proactivity and schemes of the PUAs. Who turn this into a game and science, instead of just going through life, and landing opportunities when they present themselves.

I guess it just doesn't work that way for most of us. Especially for those who join the forums.

The other day I was thinking - man, all these thousands of hours reading, watching, listening and studying "game" and "women". It's fun and I enjoy it, but imagine - there are people who probably don't even need to do this.

I had to go through years of drought and improving myself. But nothing happened. The results came only when I started taking massive action.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Every time I see a post about someone finally getting laid, I cringe. Getting laid is not some special event that only “alpha males” can partake in. Case in point - I have a moving business where guys move furniture for me. I employ mostly big black dudes and I routinely see women (house wives) throwing themselves at these dudes and exchanging numbers. It literally happens every single day.

And now you have your “pickup artist” who thinks he’s the hottest thing since sliced bread, yet he feels like he needs to do 100 approaches a week and if he doesn’t, men would never figure out how to get laid.

Guys - people are getting laid everyday and guys who have sexual value to women are constantly getting hit on. This is normal. You aren’t special because some random chick made eye contact with you.

Attractive women have an insatiable sexual drive and they literally have an ecosystem of men taking care of their needs.

And yes, I got the word “ecosystem” from actual women. I’ve written posts in the past about how women seemingly have a validation ecosystem of desperate men. But I didn’t come up with that concept. I got it from women on instagram.

At the end of the day, if you aren’t getting hit on by hot women, then you aren’t attractive enough.

That has to be the litmus test. How many attractive women are hitting on you, and not how many women you are hitting on. Because I see guys get hit on all the time.

Women are always trying to hook up with guys they are attracted to. There’s no stupid game to figure out.

While I agree that getting laid should not be treated as some sort of a big accomplishment, the example that you provided is ridiculous. Just because some aging fat housewife who spent the last 20 years in a sexless marriage (and who is probably in the process of separation and divorce - hence the need for movers) experiences a jungle fever moment does not mean that all or even most women have an insatiable sexual drive. Far from it.

Nowadays, most women of reproductive age are on weed, antidepressants, contraceptive drugs, illicit drugs or some combination thereof. These are all things that dampen libido. There are plenty of women, including attractive ones, who stay celibate for years.

 

[The Duke]

If I relied on women hitting on me I wouldn't have been with many women. My looks aren't good enough so I rely on other qualities that do attract them.

I think you are looking at this thru a very small lense. This just isn't reality for the majority of the male population.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Yeah I'm not sure when guys got it in their mind "they got lucky"...if the man has any skills in that domain it was the woman who got lucky.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Yeah I'm not sure when guys got it in their mind "they got lucky"...if the man has any skills in that domain it was the woman who got lucky.

It's related to the cultural phenomenon known as "pvssy begging" and "putting women on a pedestal" that primarily afflicts men in English-speaking countries. Other examples of pedestalizing language include "my better half" and "the fairer sex". You won't find similar expressions in most other languages.

 

[RoadKing_Rabbit]

What is your point?

That a guy who is a "natural" or has good genetics doesn't struggle getting laid?

I mean, that's nothing new under the sun.

Maybe you are dissing the proactivity and schemes of the PUAs. Who turn this into a game and science, instead of just going through life, and landing opportunities when they present themselves.

I guess it just doesn't work that way for most of us. Especially for those who join the forums.

The other day I was thinking - man, all these thousands of hours reading, watching, listening and studying "game" and "women". It's fun and I enjoy it, but imagine - there are people who probably don't even need to do this.

I had to go through years of drought and improving myself. But nothing happened. The results came only when I started taking massive action.

That's my take. Of course there is nothing new to the point of the OP. If you are attractive enough to most women, of course they make a bigger deal out of snagging you than you do of snagging them. To the point of being annoying at times.

I agree with OP, but not everyone is taught about anything on how to become that. And unless you just happen to be some genetic freak of nature or understand dynamics from a young age with some experience under your belt (good and bad), you're not going to be 'well adjusted.' For crying out loud, the #1 complaint from women on first dates is bad hygiene or missing teeth... I don't even know WHY that needs to be covered, but that's where we are with a lot of dudes... I think a lot of guys just choose to remain as they are and gripe about how terrible women are.

To be fair, there are a host of dudes that are super good looking (definitely not as many though) and have the same issues. There are also wealthy men who have issues. There's no one size fits all when it comes to seduction. And even with the guy who seemingly pulls without effort (he does SOMETHING right even if it's behind the scenes and a woman appreciates how it makes him look or how it builds/elevates his life), all a HB has to say is "No dice." Like that hardly matters, because he SHOULD be able to know how to apply "No more" VS "One more." when they come to an impasse with a woman.

 

[plumber]

Women are always trying to hook up with guys they are attracted to. There’s no stupid game to figure out.

remember the 80/20 rule. or the 90/10.... top men get hit on. other men have to hunt. being a top man is partially genetic in both looks and behavior. that's right, also behavior is partially genetic and partially chemical. its a disservice to tell the 90% that they suck because they are not one of the 10%.

It is likely that a 10% man will have a distorted viewpoint. They might think that its bad character of the 90% is why they are not a 10% man. the world is not fair.

the true alpha helps his pack.

ALL men can be in the top 10% in something... but not all can do it for looks, behavior, charisma, money.. well actually anyone can do it for money.

many men are not alpha, never will be. they need to find a pack to be in where the alphas... are cool. this is a fact and something once accepted will solve most of the issues for some men. plenty of women will be attracted to a non alpha as long as the pack and leader are cool.

we can tell them to just do it. but often they can't...

 

[BaronOfHair]

Getting laid becoming stigmatized is a byproduct of this fixation on "safety" that's infected our culture over the last decade. When words, in and of themselves, are considered "harmful", there's now hope for an act during which naked human bodies are joined together + Exchange fluids

Change THAT, and we'll again enjoy a social climate in which being a sex-positive man is not only A-OK, but celebrated

 

[Barrister]

A lot of guys come here because they are struggling with getting women OR they are struggling with their relationships with them. I was in the latter. Those are the two ways most of us have found our way onto this forum and there is a lot of good advice sandwiched between some not so good takes. Our old friend Atom Smasher always said to "mine" the place for the gold here and it is apt.

When a guy in the first category finally gets a lay, there is no shame in him being proud of himself or in others telling him "good job." That is what SS is for. I understand the overall point, OP -- but your situation is going to be different from a lot of the guys here and their experience shouldn't be discounted simply because of that difference.

 

[tksniper]

A lot of guys come here because they are struggling with getting women OR they are struggling with their relationships with them. I was in the latter. Those are the two ways most of us have found our way onto this forum and there is a lot of good advice sandwiched between some not so good takes. Our old friend Atom Smasher always said to "mine" the place for the gold here and it is apt.

When a guy in the first category finally gets a lay, there is no shame in him being proud of himself or in others telling him "good job." That is what SS is for. I understand the overall point, OP -- but your situation is going to be different from a lot of the guys here and their experience shouldn't be discounted simply because of that difference.

I completely disagree that the purpose of this site is to get guys laid. It would be the equivalent of a website that teaches women on how to finally be able to give a bl0wjob. It directly disrespects the greats like Pook, Anti-Dump, etc, that taught about life and masculinity. Getting laid is simply a by-product of being a great man, not some great goal. The great goal is to become a great man.

Only fat women would create a website on how to give bl0wjobs and celebrate their wins, and vice versa. Only a website full of losers and simps (and validation seeking insecure men) would dedicate this website to guys getting laid- when getting laid should be like drinking water or breathing air.

If you believe getting laid is some great goal, then your entire mindset is coming from a low value frame. Men with high value frames are getting laid everyday like there’s no tomorrow.

I think you guys misunderstood me. I didn’t mean men are getting laid like it’s nothing and therefore, it should be normalized. What I meant was men with high value frames are treating getting laid like it’s nothing.

I don’t know a single guy in real life who gets laid regularly that puts getting laid on a pedestal. And if you exist, you are probably coming from an insecure frame. And you are probably better off not spreading your low value frame to others.

 

[corrector]

Only fat women would create a website on how to give bl0wjobs and celebrate their wins, and vice versa.

That analogy feels a bit exaggerated. The point people are making here is that improvement often starts with small wins, not that the end goal is just getting laid.

 

[Doctor Europeo]

Every time I see a post about someone finally getting laid, I cringe.

Yeah, I cringe a lot with some of the stuff I read here, comes with the territory. That being said, I dont mind members celebrating their lays.

There’s no stupid game to figure out.

With girls throwing themselves at you? Yeah, probably; we would need to clearly define "Game" first. If a woman if throwing herself at you, all you have to do is basically not get in your own way and escalate; does not getting in your own way and escalating count as "Game"? But higher quality women were not throwing themselves at me, I needed game/self improvement. Game and self improvement are not mutually exclusive.

I completely disagree that the purpose of this site is to get guys laid.

Im not sure about that: "Discuss meeting, dating, and attracting women with others. Ask a question or give advice. "

I completely disagree that the purpose of this site is to get guys laid. Getting laid is simply a by-product of being a great man, not some great goal. The great goal is to become a great man.

That´s kind of like going to thefastlaneforum.com and posting something along the lines of "I completely disagree that the purpose of this site is to make some big bucks. Making some big bucks is simply a by-product of being a great man, not some great goal. The great goal is to become a great man."

Only a website full of losers and simps (and validation seeking insecure men)

Ah yes, we have a lot of those. Comes with the territory. It would be nice if every poster was a quality poster, but that´s just not realistic. On the bright side, a lot of those "loser, simps, insecure men" have improved a lot thanks to this website, they are closer to "becoming a great man"

when getting laid should be like drinking water or breathing air.

It should be, but for a lot of men out there it isnt. This website (and this thread by extension) wouldnt exist otherwise, and we wouldnt be able to have this discussion.

You might have some good points about "life and masculinity", "frame", "the goal should be to become a great man", and stuff. But you have to admit "howtobeagreatman.com" would not be as catchy as "SoSuave". But yeah, you might have some good points.

 

[tksniper]

Yeah, I cringe a lot with some of the stuff I read here, comes with the territory. That being said, I dont mind members celebrating their lays.


With girls throwing themselves at you? Yeah, probably; we would need to clearly define "Game" first. If a woman if throwing herself at you, all you have to do is basically not get in your own way and escalate; does not getting in your own way and escalating count as "Game"? But higher quality women were not throwing themselves at me, I needed game/self improvement. Game and self improvement are not mutually exclusive.



Im not sure about that: "Discuss meeting, dating, and attracting women with others. Ask a question or give advice. "



That´s kind of like going to thefastlaneforum.com and posting something along the lines of "I completely disagree that the purpose of this site is to make some big bucks. Making some big bucks is simply a by-product of being a great man, not some great goal. The great goal is to become a great man."


Ah yes, we have a lot of those. Comes with the territory. It would be nice if every poster was a quality poster, but that´s just not realistic. On the bright side, a lot of those "loser, simps, insecure men" have improved a lot thanks to this website, they are closer to "becoming a great man"


It should be, but for a lot of men out there it isnt. This website (and this thread by extension) wouldnt exist otherwise, and we wouldnt be able to have this discussion.

You might have some good points about "life and masculinity", "frame", "the goal should be to become a great man", and stuff. But you have to admit "howtobeagreatman.com" would not be as catchy as "SoSuave". But yeah, you might have some good points.

You taught me alot bout game actually. When you are getting signals, all you have to do is escalate. Escalation is the name of the game. If you arent excalating, you aint doing nothing. Dont even attempt to write a field report. Put your ego on the line and eighter get laid or rejected.

 

[BaronOfHair]

@tksniper "There’s no stupid game to figure out"

Yeah, as many have noted prior, thinking of this stuff as "game" was likely an error... Navigating relations with not just women, but everyone/acquiring the capacity to persuade them to accede to our wishes = A vital component of manhood

Dirty as the word "manipulation" has become in our culture from The 20th Century-today, the fact is: Fellas who NEVER learn how to manipulate their external environments end up licking the bottom of f-c-ing dumpsters, and pretending to be happy with what they've settled for. George Washington didn't lead The US to victory, and the abolitionists didn't successfully free the slaves, without manipulating a substantial portion of their fellow citizens

 

[tksniper]

I have a reply to your but I think it’s not only going to benefit you, but an entire generation.

 

[BadBoy89]

when getting laid should be like drinking water or breathing air.

Agree if the woman is ugly, divorced, fat, slut, single mother, or older than 30,

But if the woman is under 30, non slut, and attractive? No. Women in that category are sought by the top 10% of men in the world. Most men can’t compete because it’s getting into the good genetic and / or powerful and rich territory, Yes a man can work on himself to make himself more attractive, but if he doesn’t certain attributes, like the height or the power, it will be tough.

A man shoukd be on Sosuave to get with the hot women under 30. If man needs help with ANY other type of women, he’s got bigger problems.

 

[tksniper]

Agree if the woman is ugly, divorced, fat, slut, single mother, or older than 30,

But if the woman is under 30, non slut, and attractive? No. Women in that category are sought by the top 10% of men in the world. Most men can’t compete because it’s getting into the good genetic and / or powerful and rich territory, Yes a man can work on himself to make himself more attractive, but if he doesn’t certain attributes, like the height or the power, it will be tough.

A man shoukd be on Sosuave to get with the hot women under 30. If man needs help with ANY other type of women, he’s got bigger problems.

I replied to your post on my status update