"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Jumping in the deep end

Mr_rogers

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Hey everyone, just a quick question.

I have an opportunity to go to a couple bars with a couple good friends of mine who are a lot better with social stuff than I am. So I ask has anyone who was still fairly new to the DJ game ever tried just putting their fears aside and jumping right into the social scene by, say, going to a club, or a bar with friends looking to meet women? If so, is it a good way to learn, or is it just setting yourself up for failure?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Pathgen

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If you want to get better at social situations you need to isolate yourself in a cave and meditate. No friends or women just you and some candles. So i think your answer is no don't go to bars with friends to meet girls >.>
 

Mr_rogers

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Pathgen said:
If you want to get better at social situations you need to isolate yourself in a cave and meditate. No friends or women just you and some candles. So i think your answer is no don't go to bars with friends to meet girls >.>
Heh. Point taken. Thanks!
 

oakraiderz2

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Drink.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Mr_rogers

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oakraiderz2 said:
It takes about half a beer to get me feeling tipsy because the alcohol reacts with a medication I take. Not to mention that I sorta become a douchebag when I'm drunk... but we'll see.
 

Biggie

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Jumping in the deep end is the way to go. Unless you have heart problems and the water is freezing cold. Then your heart might stop and you could die. The lesson is: Go to a club with your friends and observe them. The best way to learn is to observe people who are good at it. However the women there aren't usually relationship material if that's what you're looking for. Oh and exercise for a healthy heart.
 
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