"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Job loss, self esteem and women

bigneil

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Have you ever lost your job and then indirectly lost your woman because of the self esteem loss? Your confidence is hurt and you become needy and clingy and they of course run, which hurts your confidence even more and makes you even more needy and clingy. It's a pretty sad series of events. Then you can't find other women either, and get Oneitis.

It seems the only solution is to find a new job before even attempting to date again.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Konada

Master Don Juan
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It seems like you already know what to work on. Get your confidence up, settle everything in your life before thinking about women. I can't remember who said it but it goes along the lines of this 'Women are simply just an addition into your already awesome life.'

Best of luck to picking yourself up.

Cheers,
Konada
 

dereklovesugly

Don Juan
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Just gotta pick yourself up and try again. It's rough but you'll get thru it. I'm at the opposite side of the spectrum of the job part, I'm working 65+ hours a week an lost a girl from it.
 

Solomon

Master Don Juan
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Inside her mind
bigneil said:
Have you ever lost your job and then indirectly lost your woman because of the self esteem loss? Your confidence is hurt and you become needy and clingy and they of course run, which hurts your confidence even more and makes you even more needy and clingy. It's a pretty sad series of events. Then you can't find other women either, and get Oneitis.

It seems the only solution is to find a new job before even attempting to date again.

I lost my job and had my car die on me all within 3 month period. My confidence and self-esteem went to shyt and on top of that I put on 15-20 pounds. I was getting dissed left and right by chicks even by chicks who were average or less!

It's not a fun feeling, I got a new job now, and a new car, however my confidence is far from where it use to be, I'm hitting the gym right now and I wanna drop 50

right now women and "game" are taking a backseat to the "improvement" of self
 

LoneWolf

Senior Don Juan
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Feb 23, 2011
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i don't even have a job right now. i don't even have a car either! but i'm probably starting work this month. i still don't have troubles with women. obviously not having a job isn't very appealing to most women, heh. i bullsh1t a bit just to make it sound like i'm not some bum and all. so it doesn't really affect getting women to be honest. not for me anyway. relationship maybe, depending on the girl.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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