"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Jesus... My ex BPD is getting married..

J

Johnny Alias

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So... Wow.

Just got the news my ex BPD gf of 4 years is getting married...

I won't lie I've been very broken up about her. She moved in with him 6 months ago right after we broke up. The first 3 were agony with my best friend also dying.

So they've been together 6 months... Still the honeymoon phase really especially in terms of an alcoholic junkie borderline...

I'm 38. She's 43 with rapidly fading looks. Used to be a knockout but now she's got the white wine belly, ever expanding ass, grayig hair, wrinkles.

I didn't want this... She's a train wreck. Pill popper, mean drunk, no job, debt, rage... After 4 years and 3 recycles I was done.

And now she's getting married... In the time we've been apart steroid boys been in a bar fight and arrested, she's raged at many of her oldest friends and they're leaving her, she's been hospitalized twice due to drugs/alcohol...

Sounds like a winner right???

In our last face to face she bragged about how much money he has... And before that we had a fight with her saying "I was raised traditionally. I think a man should pay for everything!" This after I insist she do SOMETHING with her day besides sleep.

I know in a few years had we gotten married she and I would get divorced and id lose everything... Especially my time... Which isn't good. I do want a kid.
The stupid thought of white picket fences clouded my thinking and I withstood loads of abuse...

I understand that BPD, alcoholism, and conflict oriented people destroy relationships all on their own... And that this will end. I shouldn't care but I do. I want it to fail. I want her to abuse the fvck out of him like she did me.

Jesus what a morning... Good thing I banged last night. Woof.

Thanks for listening...
 
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"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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T

TheException

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Someone's still upset that they aren't with their ex.

Who cares....get over it pal. Life goes on. If she is as you describe...you shouldnt give two flying fvcks about her.
 
S

sylvester the cat

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as soon as i told my bpd i was engaged to someone else...BOOM!...she was up the duff, married and living on the other side of the world.

that still didn't stop her from contacting me by email though. lol.
 
S

skinnyguy

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She will ruin the relationship by herself. Just sit back and laugh while this guy gets cleaned out and you're still standing.
 
J

Johnny Alias

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skinnyguy said:
She will ruin the relationship by herself. Just sit back and laugh while this guy gets cleaned out and you're still standing.
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THAT is what I needed to hear... :box: :D
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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D

Dgwizdal

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Sit back and enjoy the train wreck. Don't let these guys kid you into thinkin you shouldn't feel some kinda way about it - bpd slootbag or not - she had an impact on ya and you'll get over it your own way. Just be glad you got out when you did.
 
A

asa_don

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Funny how all these men are obsessed over their "BPD ex" knowing all their details and every move but still have no clue on how to really game women.
 
J

Jaylan

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noobolgy said:
Why the fvck do you know about this, or care? Sucks for her fiance. Jesus man.
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This.

Dont give a fvk OP. Thats what you need to do. Move on and heal. Dont look for news on her, and tell others you dont wanna know when shes brought up.
 
L

LeonSK

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shouldn't be surprised... shouldn't care... easy said than done but u gotta show a indifference attitude.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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M

Married Buried

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Who cares if your ex BPD is getting married? She will be divorced in 6 months. My ex BPD was already divorced, after me she got married, had a kid, dumped the guy, got divorced again, collects child support, and has made 3 different guys their stepfather. She now STILL hops on a differnt c/ck every week and she is 35, she is still searching for that elusive rich alpha that will take her away from all her problems. They are completely delusional. Some things never change, she will be waiting for that guy until she is 92.

I know all this all because she advertizes her pathetic life on facebook and it's entertaining to see how the old trash is doing. I truly don't give a damn because I have a real woman now not a wh0re.
 
A

asa_don

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Malice said:
My ex BPD was already divorced, after me she got married, had a kid, dumped the guy, got divorced again, collects child support, and has made 3 different guys their stepfather. She now STILL hops on a differnt c/ck every week and she is 35, she is still searching for that elusive rich alpha that will take her away from all her problems. They are completely delusional. Some things never change, she will be waiting for that guy until she is 92.

I truly don't give a damn because I have a real woman now not a wh0re.
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If you truly don't give a damn, then why are you still keeping tabs on what she is doing? Sounds to me like you can't let go of her. Secretly you probably still want her back.

Malice said:
Give me a break dude. The only reason I look is because it's entertainment. Like watching a show on TV. I get down on my knees every day thanking god I got rid of that woman. I met a hot young Latina shortly after this and I am in an LTR. I love watching the wreckage of this BPD. I truly don't give a damn and laugh. That's the level I am on right now.
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Call it whatever you want, but you still have an obsession with her following every detail and move she makes. Would you watch bad TV show? Why would you get entertainment out of watching an ex? Checking up on her is a sign that you are still not over her. Not giving damn means she is out of your life for good. You still are making her part of your life by keeping tabs.
 
M

Married Buried

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asa_don said:
If you truly don't give a damn, then why are you still keeping tabs on what she is doing? Sounds to me like you can't let go of her. Secretly you probably still want her back.
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Give me a break dude. The only reason I look is because it's entertainment. Like watching a show on TV. I get down on my knees every day thanking god I got rid of that woman. I met a hot young Latina shortly after this and I am in an LTR. I love watching the wreckage of this BPD. I truly don't give a damn and laugh. That's the level I am on right now.
 
El Payaso

El Payaso

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You shouldn't care....
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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J

Johnny Alias

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Haha. OP here. Hey... Y'all are good people for even commenting.

Listen. I knew this post was gonna get flamed. No worries. BPD is a helluva drug. One day you might know... But I sincerely hope not.

Thanks to this site I'm not as vested emotionally as I once was. Did come as a shock I won't deny it.

But you left her for a reason. Probably MANY reasons.

All is well. Hard to let go of your stupid imagination.

Thanks again...
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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