"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Is this a sign of interest when....

rgeere

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I met a girl the other day at a party, and she did all of the following. Signs of interest or just friendly?

*A girl seems to intentionally, but conservativelly, following you around or sitting around where you currently are sitting.

*She finds an excuse to invade your personal space somehow by pressing herself up against you to the point to where you feel every little detail of the front part of her body.

*Waits around for you when she knows you are about to leave, gives her hand out to you, and says something to the effect of "Maybe we will see each other around" or similar line.

What do you guys think? She's sort of cute and petite, so I'm thinking about inviting her to go somewhere with me. Do you think I have any chances?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Dirtheart

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Sounds positive to me. I'd certainly act on it!
 

Slickster

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Originally posted by rgeere
*Waits around for you when she knows you are about to leave, gives her hand out to you, and says something to the effect of "Maybe we will see each other around" or similar line.
Those are all good signs but this one in particular is her way of saying "C'mon buddy ask me out already!"

Seize these opportunities. You can't second guess yourself. Always be closing (number, date, kiss, etc.)

Next time you'll do better.
 

Dirtheart

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Slickster is right. When she said that you should have responded with something to the effect of: "If you give me your number we can arrange something" or "I'm free on [day], do you want to go somewhere/do something?"
 

rgeere

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I just saw her out in the hallway. Didn't really say anything to her, just walked by.

I don't think I messed up with her entirely. If anything I think I might have communicated to her that I wasn't interested.
This of course doesn't mean that I'm not, but I think she may feel this way.

At the party I didn't treat her diffrently than anyone else despite the signs. When she waited around and held out her hand I shook it and said "maybe" (in a positive neutral tone).

Maybe there was something else I could have done (asked her out, etc.). Need to find the right timing for it.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Hollowpoint

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"What do you guys think? She's sort of cute and petite, so I'm thinking about inviting her to go somewhere with me. Do you think I have any chances?"

LOL!
You don't get it do you?

It seems to me your AFC and past experiences/insecurities are holding you back.

OF COURSE YOU GO FOR IT!




DDUUUUUUUHHHHH!!
You sound like me several years ago!
 

rgeere

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Originally posted by PizDoff
"What do you guys think? She's sort of cute and petite, so I'm thinking about inviting her to go somewhere with me. Do you think I have any chances?"
LOL!
You don't get it do you?
It seems to me your AFC and past experiences/insecurities are holding you back.
OF COURSE YOU GO FOR IT!
DDUUUUUUUHHHHH!!
You sound like me several years ago!

Never underestimate a good swift kick in the rear. I'd be doing that to myself if I don't go out and do something with this girl.

Thanks.
 

romeo203

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--

Careful,
Same thing happened to me. Asked the girl for her number and she hesitated. I knew it was too good to be true. Next time I met her, she gave me a cold shoulder.
 

Aztec

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Don't wait too long. She may think that you're not interested, or gay.
 

CyranoDeBergerac

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Right around your second hint I would've realized she was waving me around third base and I'd be making out with her. Why are you stalling again?

-Cyrano
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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DJUofS

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Originally posted by rgeere
I met a girl the other day at a party, and she did all of the following. Signs of interest or just friendly?

*A girl seems to intentionally, but conservativelly, following you around or sitting around where you currently are sitting.

*She finds an excuse to invade your personal space somehow by pressing herself up against you to the point to where you feel every little detail of the front part of her body.

*Waits around for you when she knows you are about to leave, gives her hand out to you, and says something to the effect of "Maybe we will see each other around" or similar line.

What do you guys think? She's sort of cute and petite, so I'm thinking about inviting her to go somewhere with me. Do you think I have any chances?
If you think she's interested, make a move. Don't hesitate. If you sense any interest level (a good one), make a move.
 

JT47319

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Yeah, those are IOIs if you described them correctly.

Of course, if I'm reading in between the lines correctly, you tooled yourself over by acting like a total dork AFC.

Book up on anti-flake tactics before you call the bytch up. Worst case scenario, she's feeling that she gave you IOIs in which case A) she realized you're a total loser tool and she'll totally deny giving you IOIs because she doesn't want to be lowered to your loser Value level OR or B) you're not interested in her and she'll try to salvage her pride and put up her ASD shields so she isn't used for her pvssy.

Be prepared with anti-flake spray.
 
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