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Is there any reason for optimism in dating?

Pan87

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You say that sex is about power for you. Wouldn't you say that power is a trait of masculinity? Besides... I don't think most men will become Golem for banging a few females here and there that might be below their standards. To prevent having a part of their masculinity fade.
Real power is not needing sex from women to feel like a man - otherwise women rule you (don't ask me how I know this ;)). When it comes to sex itself, yes it's about power too. She submits and I dominate her. The way nature intended it.

I didn't say you were blackpill, dude. I'm just saying that "volcel" doesn't really make sense to me. If you went volcel because the only women available to you were beneath your standards, then that's incel. I go through incel periods too where the women available to me just aren't good enough. So I don't bang anyone.

Every single incel today could get laid if they wanted to with a hooker. The real meaning of incel is you can't get the women you want (which is something most guys struggle with).

Also, I recommend never sleeping with women below your standards just for a quick nut. It's demoralizing and bad for your soul. You should only ever be shooting for women who really turn you on. Rejecting women who are beneath you will do more for your masculinity than anything else.
 
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Pan87

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Life’s too short to be a pessimist. No, things aren’t ideal right now but they never really were. Truth be told, for much of human history, things didn’t look so bright for the “average guy”. Look at the lifestyle out ancestors had even a couple of hundred years ago. It was downright brutal. You have to make the best of the times we live in.
Dissatisfaction is actually how humanity makes progress. If everyone had the "don't be a pessimist" attitude then we'd still be living in caves and eating clay. Your fellow caveman would say "Hey dude, it's not so bad. Remember our ancestors used to live in a pond".

In reality, saying "this sh1t ain't good enough" and then using genius male ingenuity to find solutions is the answer.

Your solution is the wrong one.
 

DonJuanjr

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Real power is not needing sex from women to feel like a man
I never said you lose all masculinity. Just some part of it fades. While being in the sexless state you don't walk around feeling inferior or anything. It's subtle. Not noticeable until you brake the sexless state. The funny thing is... It's not noticeable by you, but is noticeable by others around you. I started a new job, I was in my late twenties. There was a coworker who was in his early twenties. He said to me "It seems like you haven't had sex in a long time". I was blown away that he could tell. I believe what ever he sensed is part of that fading masculinity I mentioned.

Also, I recommend never sleeping with women below your standards just for a quick nut. It's demoralizing and bad for your soul.
Maybe after you get to a certain point of success with women. But most incels obviously are not that successful.

I would think that not being able to hunt when you are trying to be a hunter is more demoralizing than being able to kill a deer, even though it's not a 10 point alpha buck. But one that a more seasoned hunter would ignore. There is a sense of accomplishment that comes with the novice hunter in getting that less than desirable buck.

I think we are just going to have to agree to disagree on this topic.
 
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Zimbabwe

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If you say so.
I'm almost two and a half years celibate and don't feel I'm missing anything at all worth my time and effort.
I also have pretty much zero social contact with anybody else either.
Are you an introvert? Me personally I can't stand being alone and i genuinely enjoy going out and doing stuff with a girlfriend.
 

lost_blackbird

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Are you an introvert? Me personally I can't stand being alone and i genuinely enjoy going out and doing stuff with a girlfriend.
No, I have Asperger's. Introversion comes as a free gift along with being largely unable to read social
cues, finding public spaces overwhelming, especially loud or brightly lit ones, in my case a severe aversion
to being touched by other humans, poor social skills in general, frequent inappropriate comments, a tendency
to meltdown or shutdown when emotionally overwhelmed and a distinct tendency to think in black and white
extremes. I also suffer extended periods of low level depression. What a catch huh? So I remove myself from
the social pool, in the long run, it saves me from being hurt by or disappointed with other people.
 

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corrector

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There was a coworker who was in his early twenties. He said to me "It seems like you haven't had sex in a long time". I was blown away that he could tell. I believe what ever he sensed is part of that fading masculinity I mentioned.
He was a gay guy who was trying to come on to you.
 

andreihaha

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What do you do when women don’t want to have sex with you and prostitution is illegal where you live?
You improve, not relocate.
I don't think there is a man on this planet that NO woman would sleep with.
If women don't want to sleep with you, it's because of one or many reasons. It's your job to find what those are, if you want the situation to change.
 

LARaiders85

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It is uncommon that moving from one city to another drastically changes dating outcomes. If you move, there have be to be other reasons besides dating for the move or you are moving from a small town (less than 100,000 population) to a mid-sized (100-700k) or larger metro area. It's tough to date in towns/cities of less than 100,000 when you are 25 or older.
The only problem with moving to a city is that your status is going to take a serious hit... Very few people get to play the status game in a city
 

andreihaha

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It's ridiculous that people would rather relocate than work on themselves. And that they would also advise other people to do this...
 

mrgoodstuff

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I never said you lose all masculinity. Just some part of it fades. While being in the sexless state you don't walk around feeling inferior or anything. It's subtle. Not noticeable until you brake the sexless state. The funny thing is... It's not noticeable by you, but is noticeable by others around you. I started a new job, I was in my late twenties. There was a coworker who was in his early twenties. He said to me "It seems like you haven't had sex in a long time". I was blown away that he could tell. I believe what ever he sensed is part of that fading masculinity I mentioned.
Women can REALLY notice it. It's also in your pheremones. So even if you are good looking guy, she might find that for what ever reason you don't turn her on or she's just not attracted. It's because the sexual male side of yourself has not been fed.

Maybe after you get to a certain point of success with women. But most incels obviously are not that successful.

I would think that not being able to hunt when you are trying to be a hunter is more demoralizing than being able to kill a deer, even though it's not a 10 point alpha buck. But one that a more seasoned hunter would ignore. There is a sense of accomplishment that comes with the novice hunter in getting that less than desirable buck.

I think we are just going to have to agree to disagree on this topic.
The hunter analogy indicates that one must work their way up the skill levels, no way around it to become proficient and for it to be second nature.
 

Barrister

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Women can REALLY notice it. It's also in your pheremones. So even if you are good looking guy, she might find that for what ever reason you don't turn her on or she's just not attracted. It's because the sexual male side of yourself has not been fed.



The hunter analogy indicates that one must work their way up the skill levels, no way around it to become proficient and for it to be second nature.
Agreed. Pure celibacy is not physically healthy. I believe there have a been a variety of studies that have confirmed this for a number of different reasons. Certainly sitting there and beating your own meat is not a good alternative either.

Some guys here need to listen to some more Marvin Gaye and George Michael. Sex is a natural process and it improves everything in your life. It’s also a major (and unreasonable IMO) jump to say if you want sex you are essentially being controlled by women. This mindset seems very destructive a depressing to have. Sex is the ultimate capitulation a woman can give a man. Not vice versa.
 
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mrgoodstuff

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Agreed. Pure celibacy is not physically healthy. I believe there have a been a variety of studies that have confirmed this for a number of different reasons. Certainly sitting there and beating your own meat is not a good alternative either.

Some guys here need to listen to some more Marvin Gaye and George Michael. Sex is a natural process and it improves everything in your life. It’s also a major (and unreasonable IMO) jump to say if you want sex you are essentially being controlled by women. This mindset seems very destructive a depressing to have. Sex is the ultimate capitulation a woman can give a man. Not vice versa.
Women without sex are the worst Karens ever. They have alot of stress and misery and attempt to inject it into others. Sexual men without it become bitter, cynical and negative - causing a self fulfilling prophecy of doom and gloom.

I just learned the Barry White the singer knew how the future would unfold:
 

corrector

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Here come all the chadsplainers trying to convince us that sex is important and that any guy can have sex, lol! The privilege is baffling.

You notice how you never hear of people say that food is good to eat because you might starve to death if you decided to stop eating for life, or that water or liquids are good to drink since you'll get dehydrated if you decided to stop drinking? How do you go to selling the idea that sex is good on a seduction board? This is gold.

I can guarantee you they all got vaxxed up since you add sex to that, it becomes a nobrainer.

Does THAT make the OP more optimistic about dating or more bad about it seeing he's an anti-vaxxer and one of those covid-deniers and probably hasn't gotten laid since the start of the pandemic?
 

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timmyroni

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I just got back from a major bike ride near the lake on a crowded trail. Wore an n95 mask the whole time. I was thinking, if I had taken the jab earlier, then I wouldn't have had to wear a mask, like everyone else there who did not, and be the only odd one out wearing a full N95 mask, with dark glasses and a bike helmet.
and was honestly worried about sex within marriage because my equipment doesn't work that well without herbal interventions. I guess it's just a lost cause.
:rofl: What an idiot!
 

corrector

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:rofl: What an idiot!
You are the idiot because you are unvaccinated and don't have a passport so you must just suffer. I really don't care (about getting or not getting a passport) but you clearly are losing out by making such a retarded thread that sounds like you are crying about not having a passport. Cry me a river.
 

timmyroni

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lol you're a little limp noodle tryna tell people how to get laid :rofl:

you're afraid of needles telling people to get a fake vaxx

boi your head is so far up your azz even your own wife wouldn't f-ck with you lmao.

You are the idiot because you are unvaccinated and don't have a passport so you must just suffer. I really don't care (about getting or not getting a passport) but you clearly are losing out by making such a retarded thread that sounds like you are crying about not having a passport. Cry me a river.
 

Barrister

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Here come all the chadsplainers trying to convince us that sex is important and that any guy can have sex, lol! The privilege is baffling.

You notice how you never hear of people say that food is good to eat because you might starve to death if you decided to stop eating for life, or that water or liquids are good to drink since you'll get dehydrated if you decided to stop drinking? How do you go to selling the idea that sex is good on a seduction board? This is gold.

I can guarantee you they all got vaxxed up since you add sex to that, it becomes a nobrainer.

Does THAT make the OP more optimistic about dating or more bad about it seeing he's an anti-vaxxer and one of those covid-deniers and probably hasn't gotten laid since the start of the pandemic?
Right - no one except “Chad” is getting laid and only then because he’s vaccinated. Do you derive some sick pleasure in being so negative to the point of silliness? Your attitude clearly holds you back - the least you can do is not spread your negativity to others.
 

corrector

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Right - no one except “Chad” is getting laid and only then because he’s vaccinated. Do you derive some sick pleasure in being so negative to the point of silliness? Your attitude clearly holds you back - the least you can do is not spread your negativity to others.
You are the one who has a skunk avatar.
 
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